Going Gently

Flower Arranging with Mr Poznań

Animal Helper Pat dropped by with a gift of a bowl of the. Sweetest and most delicious tomatoes out of her greenhouse. I’ve been eating them all morning like grapes.

I’m not doing much today. I’m back on nights so apart from dropping some chocolate chip cookies off in the telephone box food swap, I’ve only mooched around the cottage,

The weather is changeable with sunny spells and I made udon noodles in sweet chilli sauce as Roger skipped around the garden chasing the fewer butterflies that circle the dying blooms of the three buddliea bushes that screen the cottage from the new build.

I cut flowers for vases and stopped to talk to Mr Poznań who is looking increasingly frail as I cut them over the kitchen wall.

He apologised for not coming to the flower Show but had heard through Pippa at the Rectory that it was a roaring success.

On his way back home he handed me a few stalks of Hedge Cranesbill for my vases and told me to lose weight. He laughed easily as Roger jumped up and down in and out of view in an effort to say hello his eyes crinkling like mine do, in amusement when an old hand touched the young dog’s head.

I’ve not put the radio on today, nor music and the yappers at the new build, for once have been quiet, so the day has passed quietly, with only the wood pigeons, my dogs occasional barks to break over the sound of the breeze.

I feel a bit jet lagged and I wasn’t sure what day it was this morning

Cinema

Paris Memories

Last Night I did an extra night shift

and so in compensation I've arranged a few cinema trips with friends from Saturday.

Saturday I'm meeting Nigel for Lunch in Chester then we are going to see the classic Midnight Cowboy

at the Storyhouse.(it will be great to have a proper adult pot mortum) Sunday I'm meeting my friend Colin for an early dinner then we are gong to see the Italian L'immensita with Penelope Cruz also at the Storyhouse.

Its a triple whammy on Monday when Gorgeous Dave and I also venture to the storyhouse for the Asian comedy Joy Ride

Tonight Im on my own for the french drama Paris Memories

phew

With a heart of a lion

When I’m pottering, I leave the back door open.

The small patio is enclosed on four sides by wall, one adjacent to the lane.

This wall is known not unsurprisingly as the kitchen wall .

This is where most visitors to Bwthyn y Llan stop and chat.

Four steps lead up to a gateway into the back garden and usually this is blocked by old crate which acts as a gate when the dogs are mooching on their own.

I was making my bed when I heard the Welsh terriers barking,

Dorothy was with me as usual and immediately she and I picked up on the tone of the barking which was fearful rather than just warning.

She let out a woof and leapt for the door and was down the stairs before I could turn.

A stranger was in the kitchen and she went for him without any hesitation, chasing him across the patio where he jumped the crate.

By the time I got to the kitchen he was panting by bluebell and had shut the metal gate under the Montana arch.

Dorothy was stood against the crate with flint eyes

The man said something about window replacements but was already walking away.and her eyes followed him very carefully. Bulldogs are benign characters but I have seen this look before. When they turn, they turn totally into different dogs. Fierce and icy cold.

God alone knows what would have happened to him, if the crate hadn’t been in place.

As small as she is, I suspect he would have been badly bitten.

The Welsh had been woken by the man as he entered the kitchen , they had been asleep on the reading chair . Neither moved until Dorothy had chased the man out of the door.

I took some Flowers

I took some flowers and “crap” magazines to my sister tonight,

She’s sore, but brighter than she was.

She asked me about my date….she’s always hopeful, like a Jewish Moma

And I said it was ok with a smile

And she nodded

“Don’t settle for ok “ she said kindly

“I won’t” I replied

It was a hollow smile

The Rain On Your Face

I’m doing a few single nights with breaks in between.

This fucks with my body clock something dreadful and whereas I can usually sleep well, long and hard when I need to recently I’ve been left fidgety and restless.

There is a remedy for this, especially if it threatening light rain

And that is to lie down in the field for a while.

Now if I had a private garden, I good stretch out on the wet lawn would suffice ,

But as my garden is overlooked by anyone walking down the lane

I’d cause a bit of a stir, lying there like a corpse .

No the privacy of the field is ideal.

Yesterday I had a lie down just as it started to rain lightly.

It was 1pm and the dogs had been walked and returned to bed

I flopped down heavily

Face to the sky

Bum on flattened long grass and ragwort , a plant which needs to be removed before the ponies arrive back.

The trick is to lie there until you feel refreshed but before you feel chilled by the rain.

It didn’t take long, and I almost fell asleep before opening my eyes to the grey clouds scuttling across the sky and the three caw warning calls of a crow in the Churchyard.

I didn’t bother to towel dry.

I just crawled back into bed next to Dorothy who rolled over with a piggy fart

And slept the rest of the day until six

The Sounds

My elder sister has been in surgery this weekend. She’s ok

But she’s been on my mind and I’m dreaming of childhood Sunday mornings circa 1967

With songs like this playing constantly from her bedroom

Serendipity returns

I’ve talked about serendipity before.

Ever since my husband left, when I’ve desperately required money

It has arrived, out of the blue

Just when it was needed….

When I had no car a PPI claim came in.

When solicitor and tax bills came in unexpectedly a mortgage rebate turned up

And when I had vets bills a galore a pension underpayment was acknowledged

I’ve been very lucky.

Only yesterday me and my counselling chums met up for dinner and Some of the conversation centred about the cost of the course which the three of us are all self funding.

Of the three of us, my worries re paying course fees seemed most precarious.

Well today I received an email from an organisation that supports nurse education and development. I had approached them an age ago regarding an application for grant support.

Well that support came through today and will pay for the whole of my first year’s University fees!

How fantastic is that?

Perhaps more good fortune than serendipitous but great whatever the definition.

I sat in Churchyard this morning and reviewed my good fortune after watering my laburnum which is going from strength to strength. It feels as though, financially , I have been watched over by guardian Angel of sorts

It’s a nice feeling.

As I sat there, I noticed that Auntie Glad’s gravestone had been updated and renewed

I touched it before walking back home

And how did the date go. ?

I hear you ask

Well it went nicely

Mark talked easily and seems like a very nice man

He’s a widower from covid time and I think, not quite over his husband’s death.

I will meet him again for coffee

Breaking Bread

My counselling besties Caroline and Donna

There’s a lot to be said for meals out with loved ones.

Monday my family met up for a barbecue for my brother in law ‘s birthday,

relaxed, funny and chatty.

I loved it.

And yesterday I met a friend for breakfast which proved to be a gossip and laugh over sausage sandwiches and great coffee.

Great fun.

Last night I met up with my counselling friends at Pen y Bryn in Colwyn Bay and three hours around a table of food which included wild boar apple pie and gravy to die for, shot past in an instant.

We start our course in a month and all have felt mutually supported before the challenge starts …it’s nice to have our clique in place.

Im also pleased that my idea of a group get together means that the numerous members of the Trelawnyd Community Association are getting together for a curry night inside the hall in a few weeks time.

I thought we deserved some down time , using the hall as a venue , just for us….

Bring your own booze…..I intend to weave my way home late that night……

There is something fundamental about breaking bread together. Sitting with those you love and like, with food and drink and talking and laughing and telling stories.

No phones, no tv, no other distractions .

Just gossip, and chatter, and sharing the odd morsel

Around a table

Face to face

Karl Jenkins - " THE ARMED MAN " Benedictus

A fellow scruffy Welshman Karl Jenkins The Armed Man is a piece of music you have to see live and in a big venue.

I saw it in London over twenty years ago and realised then I would never tire of the Benedictus .

I listened to it this morning with the cottage windows wide and with the music floating over the graveyard

Date

I’m working all weekend so will fill some of the space before hand doing a few nice things.

Coffee with a friend tomorrow morning , breakfast with another ( that was this morning) Dinner out with my counselling friends tomorrow evening and an on line film course on zoom Friday morning.

Friday afternoon I’m on that date I told you about a few weeks ago.

I’ve changed my whole view on dating, I think.

I’m not cynical

But I’m realistic…..and dating will only occur in a local watering hole “ for coffee”

“ coffee” means you can make a run for it if things are not quite what you hoped for.

No investment in dinner. No long drives, no feeling trapped

And no bullshit

Over coffee I can smell bullshit a mile away.

Roses, Ballet, Castration and other stories

I spent today at home.

Bedding was washed and hung on the field gate to dry.

Underwear and t shirts on the kitchen wall and shrubbery.

I washed windows and cleaned paintwork

Washed floors and mopped the old uneven wooden floorboards

Ones that date from 1760

You can tell it’s the summer holidays as a gaggle of children ran up and down the lane shouting “ The Queen , Curtsey at the Queen!!!!” as Roger barked excitedly at them running up and down the gravel path like a loon.

The Queen cut out now is beaming up the lane from my spare bedroom

The local children find her presence amusing.

I read a counselling text book in the afternoon and fell asleep for a while with Mary under my arm. She is in season and Roger is still awaiting a reschedule of his castration ( sickness at the vets caused his original one to be cancelled)

I need to rebook him tomorrow

I made Mandu dumplings with kimchi and ground pork spiced with garlic and fresh ginger and cleaned Bluebell inside and out .

Before sweeping the paths clear of rose petals from the climbing rose which is still blooming strongly around the front door.

I love that I have a living stereotype of roses around the front door

The blooms are a deep red this year and look magnificent .

I rang Chic Eleanor and arranged to meet for coffee and booked to see old Trev in his residential home later in the week. I will take the information the visitors to the flower show gave me when they dropped off the Hall blueprints. He’ll find them interesting.

I also had an email prompt by the Royal Opera House to book tickets for the ballet Don Quixote in October for my sister’s Christmas pressie so I booked them quicksticks as tickets fly so quickly and also managed booked us in for a meal on the balcony restaurant before hand …what fun

I’ve always wanted to go.

How wonderful that we can.

Hey ho

Bunting Bank

The TCA phone box is up and running as a food bank, information centred book swap and whatever you want it to be, now that Sailor John has furnished it with its own shelving unit .

I popped up yesterday with a few books and some bunting.

Ok the bunting isn’t practical but it’s pretty and some deserving soul may like it

Food banks shouldn’t always be all about food.

I went to a barbecue last night, my brother in law was 75

I don’t see him as an older man , I see the and hear the teenage man/boy I first met in the middle sixties when I was a very small boy.

I’ve known him 61 years, the same as both my sisters ….wow

Anyhow today looks sunny.

And washing the cottage windows is the planned job for the day

I’ve picked hydrangea heads and put them in vases in the living room and kitchen and saw Terry sulking in the lane with his dog as I did so,

“ I woz robbed “ was all he said, smiling at the floor

This afternoon I read a counselling text book , the saddest of quotes

“ We Leave doors open for people , who’ll never knock again….how stubborn the human heart”

Oppenheimer

I went to a morning showing of Oppenheimer today

A film so intricate, complicated and detailed it probably mirrored the remarkable life of the theoretical physicist J Oppenheimer very well indeed .

The film by director Christopher Nolan is complicated and nuanced. It covered three time periods in Oppenheimers development of the hydrogen bomb highlighting the intensity of the storylines with some roars of musics and sound effects.

Cillian Murphy is impressive as the charismatic yet quite unlikable Doctor, and captures the intensity of the character in a kind of almost reptilian way. Oppenheimer was a womaniser and had an Ego to boot. He knew his abilities and was conceited enough to blindly disregard his position within the government machine until that government took a dislike to his communist sympathies after the war.

This is a male orientated film with fine performances from Murphy, Robert Downey Junior as Lewis Strauus the head of the Us Atomic Energy Commission, and Matt Damon, a General in charge of Los Alamos , the secret town in the desert where the scientist developed the A bomb.

Emily Blunt as Oppenheimer’s second wife and Florence Pugh as his communist sympathiser psychiatrist mistress have only minor parts in the drama, which is a shame as both interesting characters could have been explored further, but I guess the narrative ( which is complicated enough ) does last for three hours.

Oppenheimer is an excellent, intelligent and overall detailed movie which weaves magnificently intricate scenes together with intense editing and skill.

It’s worth the effort of concentration

A new Star

I just have to tell you that next year’s Flower Show poster will feature this young mum from the village who won second in the Jam class yesterday

It’s priceless

A Boiled Egg

I’m only going to share one story about the Flower Show

Ive done it to death over the last week.

But this story is about the power of feeling a part of something.

Of joining in.

Of community.

Eirlys is a friend of mine. She’s like me, not built for fashion or elegance and is at her happiest mucking our her hens in a tired old jumper.

She is the first to say this, before you reach for your keyboards.

Anyhow, it’s been a very tough year for Eirlys. Her husband died in the winter and like many, rural widows, she’s been a bit isolated and all rather flat.

Yesterday she came and chaperoned the arts and crafts judge to help me out.

She also entered the boiled egg class in the cookery section, an event slightly fraught with difficulties as she arrived a whole 24 hours too early clutching said boiled egg on a plastic plate.

After realising her mistake , she spent yesterday early morning boiling scores of eggs before turning up at the right time but in a rainstorm, laughing but stressed

“I ve dropped me egg in the street” she shouted at everyone when she walked into the hall but with a bit of cajoling peeled it before arranging it on a plate alongside the nine other entries.

She left just before the cookery judges assessed the eggs, with all the forensic detail of a coroner, she was happy that she had played her part.

After the show, I dropped off to her farmhouse with the egg. She had entered a vase of flowers too which I returned too; flowers she had picked from alongside the hard shoulder of London Road. And before she could draw breath I showed her First Prize certificate for Best Egg!

She laughed hard and long and almost seemed suddenly overwhelmed by the happiness and fun of the whole day.

It was never about the egg,

How could it have been?

It was all about sharing, and company, companionship

And being a part of something, ever slightly bigger than yourself and your own worries