Wait For Me

 Wait for me , a song from the musical HadesTown is doing the rounds at the moment 

It’s a powerful piece which strangely has become the backdrop to the story of how two snails endeavour to reach the ark. 

How odd. 

I’m full of cold which is tiresome and cancelled meeting a friend in Liverpool which is a pisser. 

I’ve just had breakfast in Tesco’s cafe and cleaned the inside of Bluebell

I’m one crazy exciting bitch !

Saying What You Think and the 10 pm Curfew

 I was never a fan of Dr Who but I rather liked this clip where the real Vincent Van Gogh was given the chance to realise that he was infact a much loved and celebrated artist. It seems kind and right and so unlike reality that meant that Vincent never realised his talent when he was penniless and dying. 

Emily is a nurse , I have worked with over the past few years. She is leaving the hospice for pastures new and she is young, gobby, confident, questioning and potty mouthed and I adore working with her. Last week I told her that fact, but I balanced the usual I’ll miss you with some home truths. 

I told her she was a good nurse, and one that would make an excellent sister but I also told her why I thought so . I acknowledged her strengths , and without embarrassment gave her examples of her good practice . The older I get, the more important I think it is to be positive and truthful and celebratory about people.  

Emily is in the middle back row and the chap in the cap is Ben another dear friend who leaves soon

I will miss them both so much 

Go on try it. Say something nice to a friend, celebrate a strength, acknowledge a skill. 

Look at Vincent’s face and tell me it’s a bad idea……..

And thank you to Gemma from Melbourne , who emailed me with a suggestion 

“ Put the dogs to bed on the kitchen reading chair at 10 pm , put a log on the fire and call the cats , and just see if the dynamic of no dogs and just me has on Weaver” 

So I did just that, and stretching out on my trendy blue sofa I settled to watch A Bridge Too far.

Almost immediately did Bun come for a cuddle , but minutes later Weaver sat uncomfortably on the back of the chair. 

The dog’s absence had suddenly opened up them for cats time 

And half an hour later I was scratching a slightly moody but receptive Weaver behind the ears as she purred a dog free purr 

Simple psychology 

But I had missed it 

The Lovers, The Dreamers and me

 A few days ago Disney brought back a “one off” episode of The Muppets which seems to tap in to a universal and collective need for childhood nostalgia. The above sing a long with Kermit leading a 2000 strong audience in The Rainbow Connection is a testament to this fact, especially as the audience was quite willing for forgo the fact that the puppeteer was obvious to all that sang a long with a green felt frog.

Adults, quite simply have and retain their childish capacity for wonder, fantasy and innocence. Remember ten year old Imogen singing the glorious doll’s song from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang at the village Show rehearsals and how all of the grown ups suddenly became all bleary eyed and silent as we watched her open mouthed.

I remember once watching a homeless woman singing You are my Sunshine , my only Sunshine to her old sick  dog , with so much passion and feeling on Colwyn Bay Promenade that it hurt like a punch.

I remember too sharing with my old Irish therapist that the song Moon River had a great significance to me and quietly she sang the words 

“ two drifters off to see the world, there’s such a lot of world to see…..” in a thin, reedy alto by an eighty year old counsellor with “ we’re  after the same…. rainbows end, waiting round the bend , my Huckleberry friend ..Moon River …and me…….”

And I joined in with the last line with my shaky bass…..the moment, raw and all rather special because we had sung it together. 

Face down in the litter tray

 I’m tired today. 

It’s all due to the Queen and an unfortunate encounter with weaver the psycho cat .in the middle of the night.

The Queen ( Gawd Bless her) has spent the last five years staring up the lane into the village from my spare bedroom window. The lifesize cut out was a gift from my friend Jane which she presented to me at Manchester Airport before we left for Barcelona .

She’s a talking point, and I find her presence amusing.

I’m also rather fond of the old gal .

Around three am this morning Mary and Weaver had a spat . The yowling woke me and I got up to find Mary cornered helplessly by the airing cupboard after a crafty old lady pee on the bathroom shower mat I was in no mood for silliness so I gabbed a pair of damp underpants from the radiator and threw them at Weaver who stalked angrily into the spare room 

Here she had a tantrum 

I’d just got back into bed when an unholy crash thundered filled the night

Weaver had knocked the Queen from her window seat complete with the large wooden box which I’d used to prop her up with. 

The Queen , now lay helplessly,  face down in the cats’ litter tray

Leaving her felt strangely treasonable especially as her face was smeared with the end product of a can of whisker’s chicken bits .

I searched the bathroom for a packet of wet wipes and finding none proceeded to dampen toilet paper with soap and warm water

It all felt suddenly very surreal, as I wiped my former monarch’s cheeks clear of cat poo in the wee small hours of the morning

Goodnight your majesty I called out when I had finished 

God Bless

🎤🎶 Rise Like a Phoenix · Eurocanción Sinfónica · Grupo Talía

Last night I caught up with affable Despot Jason , his wife Claire and other villagers for the pub quiz.

Again it was exactly what I needed, froth, humour , silliness and good natured banter, even though I was over tired with working three nights , I knew I needed the contact and the warmth. 

The new publican who fielded the queries that I was ok a week ago came over to say hello, which was sweet, he told me he was glad I was alive ….not an affirmation you get often , lol 

We won the quiz which was a bonus ( see below) 

Mary was chesty when I got home and I took her bed with me to sleep the night under my arm . At my 6 am wee break, I was amused that Bun had joined her! Paws clasped around her cardigan.  

I’ve got friends booked to meet me this week 

“ Mir geht es gut”

Chuckle

January has left with a bit of whimper and for me it’s been good riddance to bad rubbish.

I still feel lethargic and a little “ out of sorts” but already I can feel the afternoons  are lighter just a little bit longer. 

There is hope in the air. 

I am on my last night of three, and my recent  night at the cinema before nights reminded me that I was human and benefitted for a change of scene. 

Monday is the village Pub quiz and I’ve arranged to go with affable despot Jason. 

And the velvet voiced Linda has given me the most gentle of kicks-the-arse to sort of a Trelawnyd Productions meeting the week after next.

The older you get, the closer physical wellness affects psychological wellness. This, for me is compounded by the time of year and social isolation .

Everything is enmeshed and feels somewhat complicated.

My head and thinking is fuzzy

It’s not rocket science , 

Just one step in front of the other, and start ticking the mental list off.

I know I’m coming out of “ something”

Whatever something is ?

For when I helped a patient to stand up and he fearfully held me close grabbing my uniform I relaxed the tension in the moment by reminding him “ we are not engaged as yet” and that he had to buy me a gin and tonic first before I would even think about it” 

My head wants and needs to laugh 

In January I think everyone’s do

Moira Rose Confronts

One of my favourite actresses died yesterday. Catherine O’Hara was a gifted comic and actress. She stole more scenes than lassie in her time and when in her sixties, forged out a new following by creating the amazing character of  MoiraRose in Schitt’s Creek.

She will be missed

28 Years Later

The second film in the third franchise of 28 Years Later has breathed some new energy and life into the story of infected zombie types and the feral well in post apocalyptic Britain. 

Now we have the car crash drama where the Jimmy Saville look-a-like killer group headed by the dim but manipulative Jimmy ( Jack O’Connell) finally meet up to the unhinged but ultimately benign Robinson Crusoe Dr Ian Kelson ( Ralph Fiennes) and his Man Friday Infected Alpha ( an extraordinary powerful performance by Chi Lewis Parry. Don’t forget we have Spike (Alfie Williams ) from the first movie who is reluctantly conscripted into the psychopathic group and Kelly (Erin Kellyman) a fellow member who shows some much welcomed empathy, so the scene is set for a violent ( and too violent to be honest) sequel that keeps you on the edge of your seat. 

Not an easy watch , but an interesting film with Fiennes on spectacular form 

Janet hated it 

Chi Lewis Parry, a strangely attractive “ zombie”