Isn't everyone just a little bizarre?

I have a theory that when were are alone, all of us can be, well, just a little odd!
Now I am not speaking "serial killer" here, I am actually referring to those private little moments of "madness" we all indulge in from time to time.
Today was a case in point.
I took all four dogs out for their walk this morning and for a change I walked them down the snow filled bridlepath called Gypsy lane. The sides of the path are screened by trees and hedges and I had walked well over a mile before I had to stop in order for George to get his head out of a large rabbit hole.
As I stood waiting I looked into the hedge and there balanced neatly in the Ivy on a tree was a glowing ten pence piece!..
Weird? well yes it was, because in actual fact I was me that placed the coin in the tree way back in 2006.
Gawd knows just why I had done it. I remember finding a coin in my pocket, and I remember thinking It would be a grand Idea to secrete it on a tree but on reflection I cannot, for the life of me, remember my actual motivation for doing so!
I mean, why on earth,does a middle aged man, go out of his way to jam a ten pence piece in a tree?
Does anyone else do similar bizarre things?
answers on a postcard....

Tattoo

My Brother is on holiday in Florida and has done the indulgent thing and got himself a long awaited tattoo¬! He's looking more brave about it all than I would be
They have just sent me this photo (as it happens) by phone....isn't technology great?..

It's Complicated

.............well actually Nancy Meyers new comedy isn't complicated in any shape or form despite having a fairly "unconventional" storyline.
Jane (Meryl Streep) has been amicably divorced from her husband Jake (Alec Baldwin) for ten years. During their son's graduation, the pair start a secret affair, despite Jake having a new wife and Jane starting a tentative relationship with shy architect Adam (a weirdly airbrushed Steve Martin).
Hummm......,do hilarious situations abound?...well no they don't........not at all, but on the whole this film does have a few interesting things to say on the closure of long term relationships and dating in middle age, and it is mildly amusing thanks primarily to Streep and Baldwin's polished and rather winning performances.(But that is about it~)
Streep acts her socks off with the very smallest of gestures, and I always find her a mesmerising actor to watch. She is also quite beautiful and physically untouched by Hollywood standards which makes her all the more attractive and appealing to an audience. You can almost feel the waves of admiration people have for Streep, as you are sat there and that is impressive!
Meryl made me give this film an averagely good 7/10
ps. Hazel has her fourth date wth new beau Alan tomorrow......as her GAYBEST FRIEND..I get the first look at him ! I will be on best behaviour

Hard Work

Now as readers of this blog will know, I will never complain about the work I choose to do on the allotment and field, but I must admit this morning has been a bit of a slog. After night duty and -11 degrees of real frost, every water container on the field was frozen solid,like cement.
Each coop water feeder had to have warm water bucketed over from the cottage to fill it, and it took an absolute age to complete all the work effectively.
The younger hens are not doing well in the icy weather. At roosting time, they often seem disorientated by the snow and ice, and I have had to check the churchyard and field borders, where they have been found sat forlornly in the shelter of wall and gravestone. not making the effort to walk back to their huts across the cold snow.
Last night I found eight hens in this state and managed the ferry them all to a coop safely before nightfall. The buff girls are especially prone to this sort of apathy, but at least allow themselves to be caught and carried without murmur or protest.
Anyhow enough of the snow and enough of hens.... Off to the cinema with Hazel later, think we are going to rough it with the new Streep film It's Complicated

Thanks Cassie

Now I do not suffer from black moods and despondency.Sure I have down day like everyone else, but generally I am spared the artistic mood swings that Chris sometimes suffers from when he is at full stretch with his academic work.
I did, however feel a bit flat today. It is the time of year that money is tight. The Berlingto is due its MOT, and its car tax; the vet's bills keep on coming; William is due his next haircut and the credit cards need paying!
So, I was thrilled to receive a package from a rather irate new postman this afternoon. I should have re phrased that, the package was actually from Cassie (and not the postman!) and was filled with a selection of little Christmas gifts!
Thank you Cassie and Patrick, it was such a thoughtful and kind thing to do, and I am most grateful to receive them all (especially the Geeky rooster t shirt!)

Skyscraper Thoughts

In 1974, I was totally overawed by the skyscraper technology in the Movie The Towering Inferno. Having a building that stood 138 stories from the ground, seemed totally fantastic and almost unbelievable to a 12 year old geek like me, and ever since then, I have always harboured a boyish fascination in the beauty and scale of the skyscraper.(which may sound a little odd given the fact that I am terrified of heights!)
Over the years I have made secret Towering Inferno pilgrimages to the likes of The World Trade Centre, The Empire State, The Chrysler Building, The Rockefeller Centre, The Hyatt Regency in San Francisco and even the Space Needle in Seattle, and at each one, I have experienced the white knuckle, shaky anxiety-filled excitement at the sense of being literally "trapped" thousands of feet above the ground
Now that the huge Burj Khalifa has been topped out at an amazing 168 stories in the city of Dubai, where do we stop in our amazing technological race for bigger and better?
In 1974, I could hardly comprehend a building over 100 stories, let alone understand the modern day norms such as the Internet. Gawd, If you told me as a boy that every person on earth would have their own tiny mobile phone by the year 2000, I would have laughed until I cried..... Anyhow enough of this urban dreaming, am off to work tonight. The weather remains terribly cold

Welcome back on line

After a hiatus of many many months, my sister Janet is now back on line....welcome back

x

"What we need now, is a war"

A Village view taken from my friend Geoff's blog

http://onceinalifetimeinwales.blogspot.com/ (Two blogs from one Village....must be a record) Well Hughie survived his cold night up in the bare Graveyard Elm, and this morning heralded the sun, a tree full of cold footed guinea fowl (above) and a village full of activity and gossip!
Nothing unites people more than a crisis, whether it be a disaster or man made conflicts, and this morning the "Spirit that won the war" was evident all over Trelawnyd.
The post office was packed when I called in to thank Jenny for her phone call of yesterday. (She had a load of out of date milk that she offered for me to feed up the pigs in the cold weather!)
The subject on everyone's lips was of course the snow, and each person had something to say about, who got stuck where, and who didn't make it up the hill to get home!
In some cases, peoples' stories were indeed serious, for example my friend, Geoff's wife Christine was trapped alone in traffic for over seven hours, but most people made the hazardous journeys home in more or less one piece.
Of course, as always, little acts of kindness surface amid the unusual conditions. Farmers, in their tractors ferried people up the 700 feet from the coastal plain for nothing (although one farmer was reported to have charged individuals 20£ a pop to pull their cars out of the snow drifts!). The village pub opened all day to accommodate stranded commuters, and next door neighbour Mandy, was spotted darting around the village checking upon elderly friends after she had delivered the newspapers and magazines!
Not to be outdone, I dropped in some spare eggs to Mrs Jones and Auntie Gladys,offered to clear Trevor's paths of ice (at 80 he had sorted it all out himself!) and enjoyed the "bonne amie", from the much increased daily village population, as most people had decided to spend the entire day at home.
Brits love this sort of crisis, and to be fair, I do think that it brings out our normal self effacing natures and wry senses of humour. but, having the animals, , I am beginning to hate the snow and misery it brings. Extra food and water all need to be checked upon throughout the day, but at least I don't have to worry too much about Gladys and Nora, who have been left a huge parcel of stale Christmas cake this afternoon by a kind soul. After a massive feed both girls have retired to their straw filled hut to sleep the cold away

Kirsty Young: a voice of reason

Chris has been snowed in, and is spending the night at my sister's house down the hill in Prestatyn.
I have shelved his home made meatballs in the fridge (a tasty tea, you will have to admit!) and now am settling down for a spot of Internet news reading!
I love Kirsty Young. With a voice like Scottish treacle and an insightful mind and knack for the right question, she is a breath of fresh air on BBC's Desert Island discs

Today I read with interest (thanks Nige), her thoughts on the recent trend for "pushy parents" and their constant need to develop their tots into what is being termed "baby Einsteins!"
Recently Young visited a nursery . The three year olds there were being encouraged to take part in what was being termed "improvement exercises",which I suspect were basic IQ lessons. Reacting to what she saw, Kirsty wryly commented
'If my child's not coming home covered in snot and poster paint, it's been a bad day at nursery.' and you know what, she's perfectly right!
Why can't children be left alone to be children nowadays? Needy, high achieving parents, are competing with each other to be the best they can be and there seems to be an increasing hysteria to treat their children as aspirational objects rather than normal kids with dirty faces and silly voices.....kids, I am told, are now attending yoga classes,ballet,gym,after school lessons, extra tuition and socialization groups ! Primary school kids have what only can be termed "group therapy" sessions, to vent their feelings and concerns whist tiny kids are expected to be part of school forums policy making!
Baloney!
Sure develop your kids with love, support, interest and the occasional after school club! Spend time reading with them and playing sports...but for God's sake treat them like the kiddies that they are, and not potential little brain boxes in need of constant development.

White Out

The village has come to a complete standstill and looks deserted . The usually busy A road through the village is quiet and still, except for a farm tractor which looked as though it was transporting people up the hill to the school from Dyserth, the next village (below pic),

A smattering of hens had marooned themselves in the shelter of a few gravestones in the Churchyard and in arm fulls of ones and twos, I have just transferred them all down back into their hen houses.

Goose Stepping Embarrassment

A huge cold blizzard hit around midday, effectively trapping me inside the cottage. Luckily I had already given the dogs a long walk and had just finished cleaning out the 13 animal houses but my main job for the day, namely the clearing out of my rubbish filled shed, had to wait.

When I was walking up the lane I noticed a set of large wellington boot foot prints, that were spaced far apart, and started to walk inside the prints, copying the stride!

Now, I am sure that all of us have done similar childish "games" when alone (haven't we???), but I think I got a little carried away, as I increased my speed (and my gait) and effectively "goose stepped" up the lane!

By the time I had marched 100 yards, I must have resembled a Nazi storm trouper, (I was listening to "Ride of the Valkyries" on Classic Fm which didn't help) and so engrossed I was in getting my foot work right, I hadn't noticed a car creeping up behind me with 2 women in it. Both were laughing at me, and waved gaily as they passed. I am such a tit sometimes!

Anyhow, as the blizzard started I raced out into the field and put Boris and Gloria back into their house with food and water. All the other animals with the exception of the ducks had already hidden away, but I did notice Halleh squatting in the snow by the gate. He had caught the sickly Susan, during one of his testosterone filled urges and had effectively raped her. The poor hen is almost on her last legs anyway, and just didn't have the reserve to get out of his way, and I was so annoyed with myself for not preempting all this before the inevitable happened.

I gently cradled Susan under my coat, then set her up in a warm pet carrier in the field shed. She ate a little of the mashed egg I had offered her, but looked dreadfully shocked.If Halleh doesn't realise that he is a duck very soon, he will have to go!.

Guinea pigs

The guinea fowl are now free in the field, and have quickly developed from hysterical, pain-in-the arse missiles to complex little characters with a charm and humour all of their own.

When they are let free of their ramshackle rabbit hutch in the morning, with a joyous excitement they burst forth to fly the length and breadth of the field, then quite suddenly realise that they have all been separated, and in noisy panic gallop in from all four corners to meet up again.

They also seem to have incredible appetites, and have deftly stolen feed from the turkeys, ducks and the slower hens. Only the more robust hybrid hens, have kept the six gluttons at bay.

Being free, has strangely calmed them down somewhat, and I have managed to get quite close to them in order to feed and water them all.......amazing what food does for a nervous disposition.

I am getting quite fond of this little group of despots

"Ordinary is good"

I had to tell myself off a little today, after leaving a snobby comment on a friend's film blog. He had written a review of the Macaulay Culkin star vehicle The Good Son (1993), and kind of celebrated some aspects of this mainly unseen thriller. I stated rather haughtily that I wouldn't waste my time watching it, and on a moment's reflection I realised that there are some things that are thought to be "ordinary" and "middle of the road" that turn out to be quite brilliant if you give them a chance.

Last night I watched the wonderful One Fine Day (1996), and although rom coms are historically mostly viewed as popcorn fodder, I always thought that this sparkling 1940 esque comedy is a true movie classic in the Spencer Tracey/Katherine Hepburn vein.

For 90 minutes I smiled at George Clooney wringing every doe-eyed moment from his Charming New York reporter divorcee, who slowly falls for the considerable charms of the slightly neurotic business woman Michelle Pfieffer, and only in retrospect did I realise that it takes a truly brilliant film to illicit such a response.

In a similar way, I must now sing the praises of another "ordinary" artist. For Christmas my sister bought me the Susan Boyle CD, and today was the first chance I had to give it a good listening to. Now most of the tracks (madonna cover, religious hymns and elevator songs) left me a bit cold, but I was drawn a cover version of The Rolling Stones' Wild Horses and the haunting "Proud" (see previous blog).....Both were lovely but "proud" was a standout for me.

I should, I know, not be in such a hurry to condemn things I have not experienced. Pure "art house" film fans may have overlooked the joys of George Clooney's dimples..and indi music fiends may not have given the Sue Bou album a spin and therefore could well have missed out on a great deal of pleasure....keep an open mind John eh? hey ho!

Perhaps I will even give The Good Son a whirl

Susan Boyle -.Proud

To understand why I have posted this song read next blog

The Church bell

Who needs an expensive video camera?.......I took this video on my battered old digital camera this morning as the poultry looked on.
Chris is ringing the Church bell !!!!

Field update and a requested roll call

Another morning, another ice cold start.
The morning routine is practiced and now, almost relies on muscle memory rather than conscious thought. I no longer need Chris to assist with turkey tablet administration, and with a great deal of professional "joir de vivre" I can now corner Boris, sit on him, open his beak and drop in the required medication..literally within seconds; leaving him slightly stunned but unharmed with the whole affair! Gloria and the baby turkeys put up less of a challenge, and this morning I was glad to see that no more yellow poo could be seen in both turkey houses....I am guarded but I may pull all six birds through the blackhead threat.

Today is the last day of Chris' holiday, and although I love him dearly, I can't wait for him to get back to some sort of normality at the University. The combination of snow, cold, 4 dogs and a cat and a very small cottage and 24/7 Chris has jangled my nerves slightly (I know I am a pig!), I know too that I am a creature of routine, and getting back into it will be just fine and dandy!.

Anyhow I will close with an answer to an email I received yesterday from a very funny lady called Justine from somewhere in the wilds of Washington State in the USA.
She asked me for a roll call of our animals, and because I love making lists I am more than happy to comply with her request......so here goes:-

2 Welsh Terriers (Meg and William)
2 Scottish Terriers (Maddie and George)
1 cat with multiple leg fractures (Albert)
2 Pot bellied pigs (Gladys and Nora)
1 gay guinea fowl cock with a crush on Rogo the cockerel (Hughie)
6 adolescent guinea fowl that have not as yet been sexed
3 full grown cockerels (Bill, Rogo and the elderly Stanley)
1 immigrant cockerel (Jesus, the cockerel that turned up on Boxing night)
1 Buff Orpington cockerel (the sweet natured Scotty)
2 bantam cockerels (Pirrie and Roger)
2 adult turkeys (Boris and the slutty looking white turkey Gloria)
4 adolescent turkey poults (not named or sexed as these will be sold---gulp!)
6 indian runner ducks
1 orphan muscovy drake (Halleh-above pic)- who was brought up by Blanche the hen
7 golden buff orpington hens (Elizabeth, Lily,Sorrel,violet,Kate Winslett, Marion and Jessop)
2 partridge orpington hens (Shula and Jill)
1 white lace orpington that was dumped by the gate (Lillian)
1 runt hen with a dislocated hip (Bunny)
2 acarana hens (Sheila and faye)
1 pure breed excelsior leghorn (the highly strung Scarlett)
36 assorted hybrid hens including a few surviving elderly girls from my original coop (Mildred Pierce,Whoopie Goldberg, Raquel Welsh) and my champion broody hen Blanche, who has raised brood after brood of chicks and ducklings over the past few years

Total population 84
85 with Chris

Must go......the dogs need a walk and Chris is going to Church this morning and has been elevated to bell ringer, so I want to be back so I can hear him massacre the bell ringing rhythm again (last time it sounded like war had broken out!!!!!!!!!!!!)