Shut Up And Dance

This is my favourite dance song, not that I do a lot of dancing nowadays.

The video has been edited well as you can see.

It always brings a smile to my face

I met my friend Polly for coffee at breakfast time . She is a doctor and a friend I can trust and bizarre as it sounds she gave me a neurological exam whilst we sat in the Bryn Williams cafe window.

She thinks my arm weakness may be a result of muscle damage and suggested I go for an ultrasound .

I’ve emailed my doctor with her suggestions 

Skirmish

A quiet war has been raging in the cottage 

It’s all very subtle

So subtle I have missed it 

Last night I noticed that Mary wasn’t curled up asleep on the couch as per her norm

I found her sat next to the cat flap looking innocent

If she could whistle, she would have done it

I knew something was afoot.

A flash of eyes told me the story, golden eyes outside the cat flap 

Bun or Weaver were waiting to come in

Mary was the gatekeeper 

And was letting no bugger inside

Old dogs eh ? 

They can be real twats

 

Being Looked After

 Sometimes as Karpman postulated in the 1960s there is a need for some of us to take on the victim role.

I don’t say this lightly or sarcastically, I just think that sometimes us human beings need and want to be looked after. 

My GP asked me what I thought about trying out work with my weakened arm. 

I was wearing my big boys pants and was just about to say let’s give it a go! When something stopped me , 

I wasn’t sure , I was in two minds and I wanted him to make the decision .

Sometimes all you need is for someone to take over.

And he did. 

He signed me off for a month and promised to chase my tests up.

He was kind, and I needed him to be kind.

This morning I rang my old counsellor up and asked her if she had a free moment

She did

And  an hour later I was sat with her talking about my feelings of being ill and the vulnerabilities that unleashes. 

I talked myself quiet for a therapeutic hour

And I talked myself still.

My counsellor shook her head when I prepared to pay her,

She simply smiled and said “ Im retired”

Bees

 I’ve been in college today, only two more official weeks to go and that’s it! 

I got home around 3.30 and was faced with the oddest thing

30 or so honey bees on the inside of the closed window

All buzzing loudly

I opened the window wide to let them out

How odd

Flowers

 

I pick wild flowers from the hedgerow sides some mornings. The hedges are cut regularly to keep the lane open, so I’m not doing a disservice to any species

So Lonely

 The hidden disease in the Modern world is loneliness .

I see this in many of my clients where isolation and loneliness contributes to brittle mental health 

If the nhs can make a friend for people in need, the country would be saved literally millions I can tell u.

It’s so true.

The video is from Trelawnyd villager Kelda who produces a daily video entitled 

“ This is the day in the life of a lonely person who wants to tell someone about their day” 

Kelda is a talented video maker and manager and I hope to get her on board for this years flower show

Watch her tiktok videos they are a hoot, but a hoot with a serious message 

Loneliness  is a nasty affliction .

I know I’ve told the story of the woman I once washed on Intensive Care who shared the fact tha I had been the first person to physically touch her in 17 years. 

Such a fact is more than sobering 

That woman gave me two baby turkeys as a sort of thank you

That in itself says enough. 

I saw my friend Ruth for breakfast last Friday and we hugged a goodbye.

I held on to that hug a second or two more than I usually would 

Such is the physical need of loneliness .

I can own it ….and share it

This afternoon one of my clients had a crisis related to isolation and together, with  the pro active mental health team on call, tragedy has been averted 

And so if you meet someone who talks to you a little too long at the shops or a friend who rings you a little late at night please take a big breath and realise that that person may be in need your input a little more than you realise. 

As a new counsellor one of my clients shared that she had spoken to no one else but me for the whole week. I reminded her that I had heard her and that she had a voice and that made her cry 

And cry hard to hear…….

We should all have a voice

We should all be heard.

I understand loneliness 

I’ve lived it. 

I’ve coped with it 

It’s nasty affliction that no one should suffer from it, so reach out! 

Please do something about it if you can 

  

A Siamese Cat in a Wind Tunnel

 Me and my sister Janet went to the cinema last night. The film The Accountant 2 was shite but we both said it was nice to get out of the house even though the best we could say about the film was that it was short . Ben Afflick’s Botox stole the acting honours.

My first boyfriend overused Botox in later yearsand the last photograph I saw of him ( on a gay dating site) he looked like a Siamese cat caught in a wind tunnel .

Thank fuck I’m not that vain.

Mind you there are no wrinkles on a balloon as they say in Sheffield 

 

Today I’m writing an essay, my last one for university 

I’ve put chilli broth in the slow cooker for supper and breakfast is

Avocado on whole meal toast with poached eggs with The Archers Omnibus of course

Bliss

I’ve given the Welsh an extra large eggs each to play with and eat

Eggs make their coats shine

Solala from Sweden

Ps

The scene of Pope Francis’ lifelong friend the nun, Sister Genevieve breaking protocol unchecked to say goodbye to her friend left me in tears….I loved that the Vatican staff respected her and left her alone 

20 Years

 Arfon stopped his van to chat. 

He’s done it now for twenty years

Always cheerful, in his sing song Welsh way.

His mother Gwyneth lived in the family farm across the shallow valley and was a firm favourite of mine

She too had a sing song voice, which she never raised beyond a whisper.

She and Olwenna Hughes were the First Ladies I met when I came to Trelawnyd

They were peeping in the lounge window, pretty sure that the cottage was empty. 

I caught them in the lane and introduced myself, Olwenna had fat ankles and couldn’t be hurried.

Arfon asked me how long I had lived in the village before we had discussed heat pumps and how he had used the wrong grout to point his farmhouse 

“ Twenty Years” I told him

It is twenty years this summer.

I’ve never lived in one place for twenty years

Sheffield, my spiritual home took 16 of my salad years, York before that only four or so

Arfon was surprised it was two decades at Bwthyn y Llan

I’m still collating my counselling portfolio today and will do so until 7 pm when I’m off to the cinema with my sister, some trashy thriller but it gets me out of the house

I will leave you with the latest offering from my lisping choir

Enjoy