Fuck

 I joked with my sister that I wouldn’t get to Rome , given the fiasco of the post lockdown flight cancellations , and what do you know, I fucking didn’t 

In the line for security, I collapsed ( fainted ) onto the man and his wife  and their luggage in front of me.

I remember nothing of this  but a sudden hot feeling and then faraway voices , concerned and shouting.

I bit my tongue which bled all over, banged my head and I wet myself ( my bladder was playing up)

It was awful.

Awful.

Awful.

Medics on bikes arrived and a woman wiped my face with a cold wet towel 

One of my shoes had come off.

I felt better when the ambulance men arrived but I was taken to Ashford A&E anyway just after 9 am

I knew the routine but it was still all rather scary, X-rays, blood and urine tests , blood sugars, ECG the works. There was mention of a seizure but that reporting seemed vague. 

I talked to the registrar forcibly and was discharged

A support worker had my trousers washed which was kind

My small suitcase is missing,

I thought it was with the ambulance men as the woman with the towel told me that my bags were safe.

Someone at the airport will text me when it’s found, and it will be couriered to me

I want home

Old Friend

 

“ Hello !” The text pinged as soon as I sat down on the seat.

I think there’s only one straight through to London train from North Wales and that’s the 13.59 from Prestatyn 

My friend Tina was sat just behind me, we used to work together but she now works at a different hospice

She’s a Romany Gypsy and has more interesting tales in her on a bad day than Agatha Christie on a good day

I miss working with her as she has a earthy, easy  laugh and a voice like Eartha Kitt

She’s off at Crewe so I managed a somewhat overheard gossip with her until Chester.

I’m staying in London tonight, and travelling to Rome in the morning. I’m flying via London to maximise my mini break, tonight I will get a last minute ticket to something, or I may go to the Curzon to see a film if there’s anything good on. 

I’ve just told Tina, that I’m like the mum of three doggy toddlers….I love them, but it’s lovely to have an adult day away from them once in a while. 

She reads the blog and knows this 

Thank God for the Alf’s and Karen’s of this world

 Rather reflective today,

I had a sleep this afternoon and the dogs picked up on my mood immediately  and crowded around quietly and without bickering.

We slept from 2 pm until 5 pm and I missed a vets appointment and a pharmacy visit.

I will do that in the morning

I had a phone call this morning from an older lady who couldn’t use the mobile phone that well. 

I didn’t know her but I knew her daughter Sue

We had been psychiatric nurses and friends together back in the day

Sue died a few days ago after a long and very private battle with breast cancer.

I didn’t even know that she was ill.

She lived in Newcastle and our friendship was one concentrated upon a long and detailed letter once a year and texts, usually referring to 80s comic one liners, films we have loved and reviews of theatre trips we had embarked on.

My last text from her was in The end of July when she sent me this 

I texted back Are U Ok ? 

And received the 👍

That was her last message to me and mine to her.

Her mother was tearful and a bit flummoxed 

She is in her 90s and lives alone now.

I asked her if she had any help and was told that Alf and Karen have been very good

Thank God for the Alfs and Karen’s of this world

She told me derails of the funeral and said that Sue had left me a painting of hers

A watercolour of the River Ouse towards Acomb. 

We shared a flat for a short time just outside York

I haven’t even got a photo of Sue. I had a check this afternoon. I can’t even remember what she sounded like 

I felt bad about that

Ive been out on a walk to the fields beyond the lane 

And had a cry

A Haunting In Venice

There is only one true Venetian  ghost Movie and that is the knife wheeling midget in a red coat film,  Don’t look now. That WAS bloody scary 

Kenneth Branagh’s Scooby -doo version of Agatha Christie’s Hallowe’en Party is dreadful. Michelle Yeoh, 

Jamie Dornan and Kelly Reilly are wasted .

Heavy handed cinematography, too many dark sets and masks and I guessed the honey bit what a shame….nice to see sister Janet and sister in law Jayne.

 

Back to University Proper

 

My Venice pencil case all ready 

Amsterdam 1996

 I’ve just taken Trendy Carol’s hubby to the hospital. Driving around at 20 mph after we have been bashing along at 45 was a bind and totally impractical. 

“It’s like being in a funeral” Euan noted and I agree….it’s all one big white elephant and the cost alone of changing the street signage will be obscene 

( for those that don’t know the Welsh Government has changed all 30 Mile an hour zones down to 20  miles an hour..a very unpopular move)

I went to the chemist to sort out my repeat prescription before Rome and valeted Bluebell inside and out 

Tomorrow I’m back in college for the day.

Tonight I will light the fire and sort out my college paperwork and files on the floor of the living room

I’ve booked a tour of the coliseum, organised a car from the airport and tried to book two restaurants I have been totally recommended to, for consecutive nights but both told me they didn’t take bookings .

More single prejudice I wonder? Who knows

My discussion about eating along in restaurants have been interesting

My difficulty is that I’m just not used to it, especially at night. 

I am reminded here of a night in Amsterdam many years ago when a ex boyfriend was being a total arse. He handpicked the restaurant we had sat down in which was a swanky and somewhat pretentious affair and as other diners chatted quietly he proceeded to lose his temper of the smallest of things, most of them with no validity whatsoever .

He verbally berated me, until it grew embarrassing for the other diners to hear so red faced I got up slowly and walked out. 

It was the first and last time I had done anything like that before. 

And it was the beginning of the end for that relationship 

That night , I found another restaurant around Lord’s canal and asked for a table for one, which was hidden away in a corner

And I told my waitress I had walked away from my boyfriend’s sharp mouth after a one sided row

She was sweet, Dutch, older with impeccable English 

 “If a man embarrasses you in public” she said “he’s a klootzak” 

She was right, he was a klootzak! 

And finally, it’s officially autumn.

I’ve bought recycled coffee logs for the fire and made a corned beef hash for later whilst listening to old Desert Island Discs featuring costume designer Jenny Beavan and the glorious Sophia Loren

Tonight, the cottage is cosy

 

Arse on a Swing

 I got to Liverpool early as the train from Hooton was on time. 

So I went to Mowgli on Bold Street to practice having a meal out on my own before Rome on Friday 

Have you a table for one ? I asked and the cheerful twelve year old waiter immediately pointed to a free position in the window bar where a swing seat was facing the glass.  

Yes what looked like a swing seat faced me

I looked at the waiter quizzically as if to say, my arse on that swing.?

But he didn’t pick up on my non verbals .

“ Id prefer a table and a chair if you find one “ I asked nicely 

He couldn’t “find” one.

Hey ho.

I left

The Audience with Lucy Worsley was an interesting evening. The historian is engaging, humorous and articulate and her affection and respect  for Christie is clear basically because of Agatha’s very human reaction to her husbands’ infidelity in 1926 where she disappeared for 11 days.

Worsley is a romantic and Christie ‘s subsequent relationship with max a man 16 years her junior pleased her greatly and her positivism and pleasure of the happy ending was infectious 

Past Lives

 “In-yun” is the Korean belief that people in different lifetimes can have some sort of connection no matter how fleeting. Writer Nora ( Greta Lee) believes this as does her childhood boyfriend Hae Sung ( Teo Yoo) who she left in Korean after emigrating to Canada with her parents. 

Twelve years later the couple meet by accident on line and continue a sort of chasted , mutually intimate video link courtship until she again calls off the relationship citing it would be too long a time before they met.

Another 12 years later, Nora is living with her American writer husband in New York. Hae Sung visits them and amid much thoughts of “ In Yun what could have been” they finally go their separate ways.

Writer/ director Celine Song has crafted a gentle exploration of how change affects people, or not in the case of Hae Sung. Nora has changed her name, her culture and has a romantic job. She embraces the Hae Sung concept more than Hae Sung, the boy and man she left behind in so many ways.

It’s an interesting idea, spoilt a little by the lack of character substance, especially of Yoo’s character who is eclipsed by Nora’s Americanisation.

The film is unhurried, beautifully shot and thoughtful but I was left wanting more and receiving less

In the end, Nora’s self indulgence left me cold, and by the end of it , I was happy it was over.