Please Call

 

Someone I’m friendly with has gone missing.
Their family have involved the police and social media is clamouring for news.
Things are worrying
As a Samaritan I have listened to many people who have ‘vanished’ from home for a variety of reasons 
A non judgemental, ear and a voice in the dark is what the volunteers can provide.
If you read this, Samaritans can be reached on freephone  116 123

Bluebell,Ghosts and the Mysterious disappearance of a nurse’s watch

 

I was up early this morning. 
Bluebell has her MOT today
I’ve had her two years now 
And she’s been a good friend to me all told .

Strange as it may seem I used to be a rather bad driver, but now with my lengthy daily commutes I have become a more confident and practiced one.
Another positive to come out of divorce.

I tell you this in way of a bit of local colour, for the main gist of the story centres upon me leaving the house early, early enough to bump into the new village leaders Ian & Helen who live down the lane 
They were out walking their jaunty beagle.
Ian asked me if I had found my nurses Watch which he had in turn found in the lane and had placed it through Bluebell’s open window onto my passenger seat



I told him that I didn’t have such a watch and went off to search for it.
Dorothy had been there first.
The only thing left of the watch was it’s plastic case.
Like Captain Hook’s Crocodile she had swallowed the watch whole!
I’ve left a message to the watch’s owner on the village what’s app group saying that if anyone has lost it to please have a look on my garden lawn Later today
Dorothy is regular as clockwork and may deposit it after lunch!

The affable despot known as Jason has just phoned with a somewhat worrying tale of ghosts and ghouls
Now he is not know for tales of fancy but last night as he was putting out the bins on the side of his house on chapel Street he saw a stranger walking along the road.
The man was elderly and walked with the gait of a very old man. He was short , perhaps five foot five with a shock of bright white hair and although not frightened in any way , Jason stopped to watch the man as he had never seen him before. 
As Jason stopped the man vanished

Now this is spooky 

The area between Jason’s house and the chapel next door ( one of the oldest buildings in the village) seems to be a hotspot for the strange sightings of what is thought to be John Wynne the founder of Trelawnyd and village shepherd Graham as well as Auntie Gladys and several village schoolgirls  have reported strange sightings of a man in a long coat standing near to the village hall which sits on Chapel Street .
See this piece from the Trelawnyd History Blog 


I’m convinced I’ve seen a ghost  the despot said on the phone to me this morning
And he wasn’t laughing


Soup & Scotch Egg Self Help

10th October Saturday 20.00pm

I’m having a break from blogging for a bit but not from writing everyday.
That I would find an impossibility. I’m on my last night this week ( 48 hours total) after the same amount Of hours last week. Next week it’s the same
I’ve felt somewhat overwhelmed and not in the right frame of mind to publish
Yet I write?
Go figure.
I bought sweets for the day staff and an orchid for my trained colleague before I came to work as she has had a shit time recently.
Much shittier than mine .......
Lisa Tarbuck was laughing on the radio as I drove to work and this piece of nostalgia pleased me when she played it



I’m not sure, if I will post these mini snippets of daily life
But I will continue to write them until I feel ok to blog again.
I feel I have nothing worth reading or to share at the moment

11th October Sunday..2.20 am

He was waiting for his wife to pass away and she was comfortable under sedation. We talked about many things in the side room that night. But I particularly remember talking about Andrew Wyeth my favourite painter in those wee small hours before dawn. 
We shared anacdotes, they were less painful than reality.
He appreciated my love for Christina’s world but didn’t share my affection for it 
But, as it turned out we both loved Wyeth’s portrait of his wife Betsy in his piece Maga’s Daughter
Which remains in a museum in Seattle .
That was many weeks ago now and I’ve just been passed a note from the visitor, who was now a widower
He had found me a print of “Maga’s Daughter” in the US and was sending it me
I forgot my great niece’s birthday which is not like me
I’m not cooking on gas

Maga’s Daughter

Me looking at my much loved Christina’s World in MOMA New York 2014


12th October Monday10.35 am

I slept heavy. I always do after nights. 
Yesterday my family met for soup and Cornish pasties in the garden
It was lovely but I felt lacklustre and boring
We are talking about Christmas ....turkey sandwiches and soup outside
It’s a new Way of looking at things



12th October Monday 6pm


I actually didn’t get up until 1pm.
It’s pouring down and miserable 
I made cannon ball sized low calorie scotch eggs and spicy butternut squash soup
And I watched Sorry Wrong Number on the iPad as I did so
I feel brighter today


Bloody lovely


I feel better today
Rested and more in balance
The scotch eggs did it
Not the eating of said eggs ( I managed one at a push as it needed two hands to lift it) 
But the planning and making of them and some spicy soup.
Me time...gentle space time 
If I feel like this again (and more long stretches of nights amid lockdown are on the horizon)
I won’t feel ‘ obliged’ to blog 

To chatter away in that empty room

,




Suo Gân


Thanks to Cro for this video.
He posted it this morning.
I have shamelessly stolen it this afternoon
Suo Gân is perhaps the most lovely of Welsh lullabies

It’s final verse talks about not being fearful 
Do not fear it’s only a leaf beating at the door
Do not fear it’s only a small wave that murmurs on the seashore

I have my own personal connection with this piece of music as I now always associate it with my hospice Work 
I’ve posted this before but I think it’s worth repeating but last winter as I was writing up notes after a particularly busy shift one of my fellow nurses, a welsh speaker started to sing the lullaby gently to herself as she completed her paperwork . From across the ward another Welsh speaking nurse suddenly joined in and as soprano and Alto they sang Suo Gân together quite beautifully

The lullaby wafting through the quiet rooms and corridors like a warm hand

Grayson Perry’s Perspective



I’ve had a hard week...harder than I would like
It’s ok to acknowledge it, as most of us are experiencing a shitty time at the moment...
But it has been especially  hard for me....there I’ve said it.
It’s been hard as I’m on night shifts that have exaggerated my separation  from the real world...a life which has already been separated by Covid rules and lockdown.
My tentative move into sociability, cinema, friendships and contact external to my own bubble has been curtailed and so


I’m sad and I’m suddenly lonely 

And I’m allowed to be sad......
Even though I hate it......... anyway conference calls to old friends Nigel and Cheryl have helped so much too,
Perspective gained....virtual hugs given

I’ve just watched Grayson Perry on his American road trip too

And I’ve realised, quite quickly, that I’m doing
A bit crap....but in essence I’m doing  .....just fine ...

Day Off

Kristi’s work- next to Colin


Today is my first proper day off
I am back on nights tomorrow
Apart from the necessary jobs , I’m intending to watch Bombshell  the Charlize Therzon, Margo Robbie film on dvd 
I’ve made macaroni cheese for supper
It’s my sister in law’s birthday today so I’ve dropped off flowers and cake and a gift 
She told me I looked rough
I  do! She was right.

Gifts, whether birthday or otherwise do lighten the heart, I always think and today Kristi sent me one of her paintings which I complemented her on , on her blog. It’s a very welcome addition to my art wall and I’m sending you a big thank you for your kindness.....
( I must add here that I’m wearing another blog reader gift today, a lovely bulldog T shirt from Jackie D it made a welcome change from my now rather robust collection of Walking Dead t shirts)

Trump’s idiocy post Covid has left me speechless 
As did his maskless wave to the nation to the avengers theme
Arsehole
I’m not watching the tv news now 
The dahlia and rubekkia are blooming their last in the garden and look cheerful 
Cheerful is good today  


Ps
Bombshell proved to be an inspired choice of dvd purchase 
It’s a wonderfully insightful and intelligent study of the sexual harassment of female anchor women from Fox News by the CEO Roger Ailes. 
Worth seeing especially for Therzon’s powerhouse performance as anchorwoman Megan Kelly






First Son Of Trelawnyd

 


The books I’m about to read are being stacked against the foot of my new Sofa in readiness of my days off.
I am yet to claim the sofa as my own as yet
Quelle surprise!

I note from the village what’s app site that Trelawnyd’s son  poet and author Emyr Humphreys has died at the age of 101 in his Anglesey home. 
Humphreys was brought up in Trelawnyd and many characters and situations described in his books were taken directly from his upbringing in the streets I know well
On the recommendation of Pippa in the rectory I have just bought his most famous novel A Toy Epic written in 1958
No doubt that will be placed on the pile for when the sofa finally becomes free!

I’m washed out today

3\4 Rainbow

Three quarter the way through night shifts
And Dorothy has now mastered sleeping with me and Mary during the day in bed without losing control of her bladder.
As you can imagine, it makes for a more peaceful day all round.
She still has to get as close as is bulldog-ly possible in order to watch me sleep and more importantly breath, but after the first half hour of anxiety filled dread, she finally relaxes enough to sleep herself, that is,  after she hears me snore like a pig a sound that presumably reassures her that I haven’t slipped away in my sleep. 

The village wardens have all reported in to our leader the Velvet Voiced Linda yesterday evening before I set off for Llandudno which was nice
There was much light hearted discussion about reinstating village stocks after one rather grumpy member of the warden group complained about lights being left on in the village hall but no one had any real news, given the lockdown.
We were all hoping for some sort of social gathering before Christmas....hummm that looks unlikely unless the 30 people outdoor rule changes

My sister Janet visited yesterday afternoon too, but didn’t disturb me as she left a gift in the box by the front door.
A gay rainbow for my window, which was nice.
I’ve been reading about the history of the rainbow flag.
It’s not only the adopted flag of the LGBTQ community ( circa 1970) but also the International peace flag 

It’s brightened the cottage on a very blustery and wet weekend.