My New York Christmas Snowglobe
Last Christmas I was quite destructive and I knew it.
That's why I chose to spend the day on my own
I knew I was in a poor place and I remember behaving badly when going to a dreadful amateur Dickensian production of Gothic ghost stories
Instead of rolling with the dreadful acting punches, I ridiculed and bitched about everything and I made a disappointing evening a great deal worse
No one likes a killjoy.
Especially me
And there I was the biggest fucking killjoy since
Herod
Recently fate has been conspiring to undermine my better humour and resolve. My trip to London to see Nu and Sitges Jon cancelled , my divorce's elusive
decree Absolute, halted by pedestrian legal work. Physical cold after cold after shits have meant time off work ( without pay) and the pay I have had has been squeezed thin by solicitor and tax bills both "thoughtfully" requested weeks before Christmas
Oh poor me !
But not
poor me eh?
Nu sent me a miniature Christmas tree through the post, complete with lights and baubles and star while Sitges Jon send me a photo of a treat he had bought me from Fortum & Masons ( three bespoke scotch eggs!)
And yesterday I received two wrapped gifts from my nephew Leo
Hand written Gifts that lighten the heart whilst your arse is red from sitting on the bog!!
Sunday I was helping a support worker clean and move beds around the hospice.
She was fed up and tired and as we negiotiated a few fire doors which I managed to keep open my an over stretched bit of leg action I felt something rip in by boxer short area.
I overplayed the rip , just a little and the support worker who is called Cat started to laugh.
I overplayed more and we both started to giggle and the giggling intensified as giggling so often does when you are tired and a little sad and at work and are in need of a bit silliness and humour.
And moments later were we're helpless on the floor crying and laughing and messing around like little kids in a school yard.
She told me how much she liked working with me as several of the nurses have done recently
And that's a boost.because it's true!
So Despite myself ,
I hope I am no longer a killjoy