My New York Christmas Snowglobe
That's why I chose to spend the day on my own
I knew I was in a poor place and I remember behaving badly when going to a dreadful amateur Dickensian production of Gothic ghost stories
Instead of rolling with the dreadful acting punches, I ridiculed and bitched about everything and I made a disappointing evening a great deal worse
No one likes a killjoy.
Especially me
And there I was the biggest fucking killjoy since Herod
Recently fate has been conspiring to undermine my better humour and resolve. My trip to London to see Nu and Sitges Jon cancelled , my divorce's elusive decree Absolute, halted by pedestrian legal work. Physical cold after cold after shits have meant time off work ( without pay) and the pay I have had has been squeezed thin by solicitor and tax bills both "thoughtfully" requested weeks before Christmas
Oh poor me !
But not poor me eh?
Nu sent me a miniature Christmas tree through the post, complete with lights and baubles and star while Sitges Jon send me a photo of a treat he had bought me from Fortum & Masons ( three bespoke scotch eggs!)
And yesterday I received two wrapped gifts from my nephew Leo
Hand written Gifts that lighten the heart whilst your arse is red from sitting on the bog!!
Sunday I was helping a support worker clean and move beds around the hospice.
She was fed up and tired and as we negiotiated a few fire doors which I managed to keep open my an over stretched bit of leg action I felt something rip in by boxer short area.
I overplayed the rip , just a little and the support worker who is called Cat started to laugh.
I overplayed more and we both started to giggle and the giggling intensified as giggling so often does when you are tired and a little sad and at work and are in need of a bit silliness and humour.
And moments later were we're helpless on the floor crying and laughing and messing around like little kids in a school yard.
She told me how much she liked working with me as several of the nurses have done recently
And that's a boost.because it's true!
So Despite myself ,
I hope I am no longer a killjoy
Good for you John - kind and thoughtful as ever, you bring joy to others every day in every way. I know that it has been a very difficult year for you but 2020 can only be better. You deserve it and I know there are literally hundreds of people wishing you much happiness in the future.Hugs Susan
ReplyDeleteYou're not a killjoy John, far from it. You're far too empathetic and funny (even if unintentionally funny sometimes!) to be a killjoy. Silly belly aching laughter with friends or colleagues is just the best kind - especially if those around you don't know what you're laughing at. xx
ReplyDeletePS It's your decision of course, but I really hope the Santa with the big willy wins the best card comp. And I really hope someone sends me the same card - it's hilarious.
DeleteFortnum and Masons - the inventors of the scotch egg. Enjoy!
ReplyDeleteThat's what I miss about work.
ReplyDeleteThe best part of work is being goofy and silly with coworkers! People who make that happen are true gems in the workplace.
ReplyDeleteIt takes time, the best is yet to come.
ReplyDeleteNothing better than laughter and humor and even better it is contagious. Friendship is the holy grail. Susan
ReplyDeleteWhen we have been hurt, we tend to be hurtful. I think that is what happened to you last Christmas.
ReplyDeleteI know this year has been so very hard for you but you have received a lot of love and thus, you are sharing it. Good for you, John! I know your co-workers do love working with you. You bring things to the job that no one else could.
Mirth is probably the most special gift of all.
And I thought it was going to be something about Albert. Oh, never mind. ;-)
ReplyDeleteLike Raybeard, I thought you'd caught Albert laughing ...
ReplyDeleteA poet named Lois Wyse wrote a poem titled "10pm" that starts 'When I am not at peace with me, I do not like you either.' It's hard to pretend to be happy when you're not due to things beyond your control.
Big hugs!
when you think about it, the scotch eggs were the perfect gift. you saw something you covet from a good and thoughtful friend but didn't suffer the guilt from eating them.
ReplyDeleteAt least the shits and the pant ripping didn't occur together! That would have been messy x
ReplyDeleteKeep your pecker up!
ReplyDeleteLove your sense of humor! When things get crappy... I laugh when I feel like crying... (lol) Sent a card from USA a week ago. Hope it gets to you before Christmas. Cheers John!
ReplyDeleteCali G
I am glad you have had some flickers of joy among all the crap you have had to deal with this year. I bet you are a great addition to the team you work with. It is wonderful that your colleague shares the same sort of humour as you do. Tell her you wrote a blog post that she was in! x
ReplyDeleteHere's a toast to better days ahead!
ReplyDeleteThere's nothing like a good giggle.
ReplyDeleteAnd three bespoke scotch eggs.
I think next year I am going to get myself a little gift for the start of each week from the beginning of December, through to the end of February. Just like an advent calendar to myself. Nothing big just something each week. The darkness is not my friend and I think a lot of people struggle through the winter months with the lack of light and with all the extra you are going through, it is no wonder you have lost a bit of joy. Hold on John its a new decade soon, go into it roaring like a hurricane and claim it as a fresh start and the best years to come! Feel better soon sweetie. Sol xxx
ReplyDeleteYes, that would be a killjoy...Killer? What the heck, you needed it. Please take care of you, hugs from me.
ReplyDeleteCat (a different one...)
Laughter is the best medicine, so true.
ReplyDeleteYou couldn't be a kill joy if you tried! x
ReplyDeleteKill joy? You? As I type Jazz is laughing loudly - so you did make a cat laugh.
ReplyDeleteWe all have our killjoy moments, as we do our moments of good humor. You're just being human, and it's all transient anyway. Glad you had a good laugh with your co-worker! And sorry to hear about your cancelled trips.
ReplyDeleteMay the road ahesd bring you peace,joy and a happy new year.
ReplyDeleteYou're a funny guy, John!
ReplyDeleteFinding humor is the best.
ReplyDeleteOh, no fountains of shit shooting from a naked man's arse tonight? I have come to expect it.
ReplyDeleteTo unexpectedly laugh with abandon is such a cleansing thing. I love it when that happens, to me or to anyone I know, because it's truly a wonderful feeling.
ReplyDeleteShared laughter is the best! I think the song “Better Things” by the Kinks says everything I wish for you.
ReplyDeleteXoxo
Barbara
I think that all the poo poo that has been evacuated from your lovely bottom recently John,is a good thing in a way and it's the universe telling you that the crappy times have passed and lovely,happy times are ahead for you now x
ReplyDeleteLaughter always wins out you have made me laugh and cry through the year but you have never been a kill joy, hang in there John a new year full of possibilities is close at hand.
ReplyDeleteLaughter as they say is the best medicine...no way are you a killjoy. Good luck is coming your way.. I can feel it.
ReplyDeleteJo in Auckland
Helpful hint from my childhood: a sore arse from a bout is instantly soothed with an application of cornstarch. It works wonders. No shit.
ReplyDeleteI for one absolve you of the taint of last year's sins against loving yourself and what you do. How I remember some helpless laughing like that at work, myself.
ReplyDeleteI know that better days are ahead for you, John. You have come a long way from where you were last year. Keep laughing, it is good for the heart, soul and whatever ails you.
ReplyDeleteThis season is very hard. We're supposed to be jolly and full of good cheer and a lot of times that pressure just makes everything worse. Sounds like you're doing a good job of making things better with positive self talk (all real stuff). Keep it up! You inspire some of the rest of us.
ReplyDeleteOh for a really good laugh. I knew you would bounce back.But as alwayS, it was to help someone else .Liz in C.
ReplyDeleteLaughing is good for a body.
ReplyDeleteOh, those fits are the best medicine. Wishing you more side-splitting, well pants-splitting, laughs.
ReplyDeleteMy work friends are my best friends.
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ReplyDelete