Essay Finished!

My reflective report was only 750 words but it took all day to complete 

I was tired after an emotionally fraught day at work  on Sunday, that’s why….I wanted to lie in this morning

Having a frightened patient is difficult sometimes as they need a great deal of time and watch you like a child watches it’s mother during a thunder storm . 

The trick to gain a patient’s confidence is to work with purpose, be honest and to look them directly in the eye as you explain your plan of care to them and their family .

You use touch with everyone, ( if appropriate) and you give them something they can control.

No one should be frightened at the end of life.

Medication administration at these times must be supportive, regular  and brave at these times.

Yesterday we had a word game about shots of alcohol instead of injections and hours after I met them

My patent told me I was fucking mad and we grinned and held hands with each other just before I left to go to the theatre

It took a while before I allowed myself to laugh at the jokes on stage. But laugh I did 

And a dear colleague who took over me on night shift messaged me this morning to tell me my patient had died peacefully when asleep not long after my shift ended. 

It’s my day in college today. A day which  has its own different stressors, so I checked with my sister if we were still going to see Wicked Little Letters tonight.

Some good old swearing should be fun 

I adore Jessie Buckley after seeing her tour de force Sally Bowles performance in Cabaret and Olivia Coleman is always worth a viewing 

Please no thanks yous for being a nurse…not wanted or necessary , it’s nice to ventilate about it sometimes

Dorothy had been quite sick today. I bought her some chicken which she enjoyed with rice and last night she slept under the duvet again with her honey head in my armpit 

I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue—live and The Complete Mrs Trellis

My friend Ruth and I went to see the stage uk tour of the Famous radio show last night. And a neat brogue wearing fifty something turned and laughed and agreed with us when Ruth commented that the whole north wales was devoid of all radio4 listeners as they were now all gathered in one place. 

The production was great silly fun, with the audience given kazoos to join in with the music rounds 

I will leave you with the clean Mrs Trellis anthology ( just dip in to get a flavour)

But the best double entendres were the ones featuring GIVE US A CLUE’s Lionel Blair in the 1990s ( when I was introduced to the programme)

They are not quite allowed now , but are fantastically funny listening 

Here’s the link to 25 minutes of some truly hysterical dirty minded radio 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1wTR03jlQ8M

Enjoy x

My kazoo

A Little Moment

There is a new horse on the field 

A skewbald pony infact.

He’s on one side of the field. 

The three resident ponies are on the other.

Mary and I watched them meet over the fence this afternoon.

Sue warned me the introduction may get noisy.

We sat in my bedroom window with a blanket 

It was cold and Mary looked like a little Virgin Mary with the blanket around her head.

She sat on my knee, watchful and happy. 

She now has a slight cloud in one eye, showing her age,

I hadn’t noticed it before.

All the ponies had been given hay to keep them busy but the three bays kept nodding their heads to the newbie who pretended to ignore them 

He moved closer at every munch though. 

And We could almost taste the tensions. 

The skewbald finally was near enough to extend his head over the fence and the three little bays reached over too to sniff the air between them. 

Mary shifted, excited at their meeting

And I held my breath.

A loud whinny, and two ponies jerked their heads and spun around, 

But soon after there was more sniffing and more head nodding.

It was fascinating to watch.

And Mary put her paw onto the window

As we sat a while longer to watch.

Azul Y Negro - No Tengo Tiempo

Was it Calpe or Fuengirola ? 

Who knows 

A family holiday with my sisters, brother in law and nephews

Circa June 1983

Techno pop filled on the Spanish radio and the bars, and one song seemed to be played time and time again.

It was my brain worm.

Bizarrely I remember walking into a small record shop in some town and in that terribly English way, I bought the first record whose sleeve I liked the look of , fuck me it turned out to be the song that I had become slightly obsessed with all that holiday

I have always loved that big of serendipity .

Now that record has long been lost, but last night, with my essay deadline looming , I set myself the task of finding that Spanish song from so long ago.

I love the internet,

It took me 20 minutes to find.

Mentally I wasn’t in the right frame of reference to write my essay yesterday.

I researched the internet, spoke to my friend Nigel at length about nothing, walked the dogs and walked down the lane to see Village Leader Ian, who was busy with friends in his garden so I gave it a miss.

Socially I can be so inept sometimes.

Underneath I’m quite shy.

I lit the fire early and watched a cracking Swedish disaster movie called The Abyss on Netflix, then texted Nu who didn’t ring back, made Nasi Goreng which I ate with chopsticks as the dogs growled for the best position to watch and then went to bed.

I’m meeting friend Ruth for lunch today but have rescheduled the film with my sister until Tuesday .

I will complete the fucking essay later.

Dorothy has lost even more weight this week. She’s on a low fat several times a day

She’s incredibly clingy and slept under the duvet with me last night, which is a rarity 

She’s feeling the cold.

Planning

 

I’m supposed to be writing an assignment

True to form I’m busying myself on other things.

I will knuckle down, shortly. 

A patient’s relative told me that I looked like the front man of the band Elbow 

Now I don’t know my Elbow from my arse so I had a look on YouTube 

He’s thinner.

But I’ll take that .

I loved this version of the James Bond hit 

This is my social life diary.

This is where all of my holidays, work rota and social life is arranged. Because of demand, we are only allowed to request a certain amount of shifts off at work so it’s important and prudent that social life is arranged properly.

Instead of writing my essay, the diary has been open and time away has been arranged. 

My sister and I will be revisiting London in the summer where we will go to the Saddler Wells revival of A Chorus Line. The tickets are not expensive if you get in there quick at booking time and will serve as my sister’s birthday gift. 

We will visit Buckingham Palace the next day which will tickle my Royalist muscles 

A must see is my favourite musical of all time and that is the tour of Come From Away which is showcasing in Llandudno in July. 

Gorgeous Dave and I also have tickets to the stand up Troy Hawke who is playing a night in Rhyl ( of all places) he’s a delightfully funny man.

After seeing how cheap some flights are to Poland I’m kind of thinking a long weekend to see my friend Alex in Łódź 

Love and Affection

 

What do you get a friend for his 70th birthday?

The inspiration came to me in a bookshop after a long mooch

The Guinness Book Of World Records

A good choice for a man who likes facts.

I wrapped the book in tissue paper and placed it with a card and a diary with pen in a gift bag and was just about to set off when Islwyn stopped me for a chat. I told him I was going to Nick’s birthday drinks do and he asked me to wish Nick his best

“A nice man “ Islwyn observed thoughtfully.

Nick and the Velvet Voiced Linda live in a comfortable cottage in the centre of the village. I got there around 6 pm and it was packed with people coming in and out, drinking and laughing. 

Most from the village.

Now Nick hasn’t been that well of late, something that’s not at all a secret , so his friends have witnessed his challenges over the past year. 

I thought about this after my second glass of Grenade Juice, and caught TCA chair Bridget’s eye as she downed hers. 

Linda serves up a lethal gin cocktail that works quicker to relax you than any anaesthetist’s syringe could possibly do. 

Suddenly it felt like Christmas.

Nick looked like Mr Bountiful.Surrounded by cards and gifts and as the evening party came towards a close, friend after friend said their goodbyes with a handshake, a hug and a kiss.

There was a great deal of love and affection in that little cottage last night, I thought

Love, affection and respect 

How lovely

Loved The World

 I was tired when I got home this morning. So much so, was that I only briefly walked the dogs, and didn’t even brush my teeth then slept the sleep of the innocent until 2 pm when Dorothy gently occluded my airway by resting her head on my throat.

We all trooped down to Bluebell and walked along the Dyserth Walkway with me sweating and overheated in my new smart woollen coat. 

We bumped into my sister in law who was taking her baby grandson ( my great nephew) for a walk in his pram. I’d never met my great nephew, though I had sent gifts and cards when he was born and was struck by his auburn colouring. So like my brother Andrew his grandfather.

It’s funny how some families gently disappear off the radar.

It’s the way of the world.

I’ve lost track of the days, but need to buy my village friend Nick a birthday gift. He’s 70.

There’s an open house do at his 4-7 for one of his wife’s ( Velvet Voiced Linda) lethal Gin and bitter lemons. ( a drink that could floor a decent sized African Elephant ) 

So I’m writing this, then will pop out to buy him a gift.

The kitchen looks as though there’s been a western Bar fight in it, Roger has been mooching on the tops again.

The rest of the week I will be writing a personal journal which will be marked and will need to be academically referenced, but it’s not all gloom, I’ve arranged with my sister to see Wicked Little Letters which I suspect will be awful , judging by how’s its being marketed) and with another friend to see a recording of I’m sorry I haven’t A Clue at Venue Cymru . For those that don’t know Clue is a much loved silly radio game played for laughs. It’s been running over 50 years and is filled nipple to knee with dirty double entendres. 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I%27m_Sorry_I_Haven%27t_a_Clue

On Saturday I’m going out to lunch at a gastro pub.The Queens Head at Glanwyddan with my friend Ruth.

So it’s not all books and research.

And Dorothy how is she?

She’s plodding along. It’s very evident she’s lost weight, and that’s not nice to see, but her pain has gone , her sickness has reduced and she’s eating and enjoying walks and cuddles.

Let’s wait and see

A John Lewis delivery driver has just dropped off a new side table for my tiny tv ( see above!!!) and she galloped around the garden path with the others then craned her head up over the kitchen wall in order for him to be able to kiss her boney head.

Which he duly did, without hesitation after I gave permission 

I must have done something right

For  all of my dogs have loved the world 

Busy

 Mr Pudding Sent me this update on the book today which I will accept with a wry smile. There may only be one or two here that will understand just how odd this picture feels for me lol

Busy day today 

Lectures and group work all day. 

Discussion group on gender issues on line until 6.30 than I’m off to work to cover sickness. Don’t worry dearheartx I’m not over doing it, will take Thursday off work in Lieu