I've been thinking about " role appropriate " things today.
One is a pretty straightforward situation.
The other , perhaps , is not.
Modern day quandaries I guess.
The new
Trelawnyd Flower Show Committee has asked me to MC the event on the 17th of August.
Now I understand their position and the fact that getting someone who is comfortable at speaking to a crowd is sometimes as difficult as counting hens' teeth but to most in the village My rotund figure is synonymous with the show itself, so to me I just seems right not to be seen to take a
management role in the proceedings.
This seems like a no brainier.
My other recent quandary has been much more of a knotty issue.
Should I attend my former father-in-laws funeral down in Margate ?
From the get go, I have been bombarded with conflicting advice about this one.
And I understand clearly just why different people stand in their own camps.
But Richard was a man I had become close to over two decades, so why wouldn't I consider paying my respects.?
The day is about him....it's not about anyone else!
The knotty issue, for many, would the fact that I have no status in the proceedings.
I am not now " family" , I am now an ex whose presence could be a locus of some uncomfortable feelings for some. ( or so some people think)
Now,......al this is the stuff of tv dramas where the now marginalised character can be seen
mysteriously at the back of the chapel with a hat and veil on.
It's all very silly as all there ensure that my potential presence will not be a source of discomfort for anyone and Chris is happy at my request to attend
When I think of my father in law, I remember a night in midsummer when he and I sat on the back patio with the dogs and several bottles of vino.
My husband had retired to bed , and it was a humid, relaxed evening when tongues were loosened and old, much buried thoughts and worries were shared with a friend.
I got to know the man who played my father in law , that night , and the conversations bonded us together so much more than the perfunctory roles had done before hand.
It was this memory that reminded me just how important it would be for me to attend his last goodbye.
Having said this, I am now working the night before the funeral and am having a few issues with sorting changing my duties out..... I have no kudos now, now my notice has been handed in ....
And so logistics may conspire against me in my wish to attend.....
Having said this, if I go, I will be sat quietly to one side ( without the veil) in the chapel and will disappear quietly into the congregation after the deed is done.