Wild Flowers

Winnie lay in full sun as I was collecting wild flowers .
There was shade in the garden but she just could not be arsed moving
Subsequently she overheated and became a little unresponsive and panting as old bulldogs can do.
I lifted all 26 kilos of her and lay her nippledown on the cold concrete of the back patio then doused her with cold water.
20 minutes later she had strength enough to eat a cold cocktail sausage 

A Blog Conversation

I was going to do a film review tonight but after washing my face, donning one of my neat birthday shirts and driving to Theatre Clwyd 
I found out that I'd got the date wrong and the place was silent except for a noisy kids production set up in a big inflatable globe!
I came home again and put on my pyjama bottoms
Hey ho

This is a subsequent blog conversation between three friends

I once fell asleep on a bus with a mini pork pie in my mouth 
ReplyDelete

Replies

  1. If I'd been there I might have drawn a sketch of you. I have a sketch of a man asleep with his mouth open and a woman stuffing her face on a train. 
  2. I fell asleep whilst shagging once. The relationship didn't last very long.
  3. I read a book at the same time once. That one didn't last long either.

Arsehole


I was too busy listening to this piece of music yesterday and almost got knocked off my feet by a woman riding her bike down Lower Bridge Street in Chester .
She called me an arsehole
( well I lip read that she called me an arsehole)
Arsehole is a great put down
Especially when uttered in an English accent
Arrrrrssssssseeeeeee.............hoooooooollllllll

By The River Dee

I am sat by the River Dee in Chester.  It' a glorious afternoon. In half an hour I shall meet up with an old friend. He has organised a detour on his way home to Manchester to meet me.
Recently my old friends have been a godsend. You touch base with them and years of love and friendship and mutual support rekindle and all becomes right in the world even though it isn' t really alright at all.
I'm lucky. I have a lot of friends
Human bubblewrap 

Daily Dog Protest


I was sat in the Churchyard on the bench by the Porch door when I fell into conversation with a very Welsh couple from Babell.
I explained just why Winnie and Mary was with me and informed them that like minded Trelawnyd-ites were going to bring their dogs to the churchyard in protest to the new signage..they nodded in that solemn way many older Welsh people do when they are being polite but uninterested .
They wanted to know who looked after the new cemetery as it was so tidy and as they droned on a memory popped into my mind out of nowhere.
A silly memory of a childhood pet tortoise called Achilles.
You could buy tortoises from pet shops then when I was eleven
And I bought a lovely one with black button eyes
I'd only had it for 24 hours when our fat family Dalmatian called Tina, who had taken a sudden dislike of everything reptilian, ripped its head off after a prolonged bout of chewing.
My father, who was incredibly weak where gore was involved, came across Achilles' corpse whilst out with the petrol mower and the whole bloody mess was too much for him and he fainted clean away .
My mother found him slumped next to Achilles' body when she went out to investigate why the mower was roaring away in the privet hedge.

Funny what you remember

Just Before Bed






All the neighbour's lights have come on .

Walked bulldog in bare feet for last walk of the night. Stepped on frog

Frog screamed

I screamed even louder

Bulldog then swallowed frog

I then screamed again

Off to lie down in a darkened room

A New Set Of Characters


The new Trelawnyd community Association had their open afternoon today in the village hall and it was nice to see a new set of characters coming into the spotlight as we , the committee from the Flower Show step back into the shadows .
Information from the friendship group and choir stood alongside the flyers for the folk music concerts, newly proposed youth club, art and craft group, women's institute and environmental society and even the local archery club brought a full scale target in the shape of a wild boar to advertise their presence .
One wag who stopped by my table ( I was bigging up the village afternoon tea party event in July btw ) suggested that we use the archery club to remove Irene from the church field!

This will divide things



Trelawnyd Church has a shiny new notice on the gates...Now I am the first one to argue all dogs should be well behaved and under their owners control at all times but I think this decision is heavy handed especially as the old churchyard cemetary is overseen by flintshire county council. Interestingly on the council website it is stated that dogs are " always welcome in cemeteries as long as they are on a lead"I understand that the sign was put up by the church council after village elder Islwyn was accidentally head butted by a local Labrador

So I for one will be enjoying the old graveyard with old Winnie in tow for a good while longer