Stuff

It started off a rather melancholic morning. I was up early as I had already caught up on sleep over the last few days and was feeling a little better despite having a streaming nose from the cold which has now decided to " ooze"
I culled a hen before breakfast which isnt a nice job at the best of times, but she looked so sick that I felt obliged to do the deed there and then.
I laid her body next to the badger track through the field and later her body will be recycled by them as they scratch out a living in the cold autumn ground. In the meantime some of the other hens and the gentle cockerel Thor gave her sad little body the once over.

I was repairing a Mary ripped hole in a pair of pyjama bottoms when there was a knock at the front door. It was a friend from work wanting coffee. She told me she had tried to come through the back garden but a ugly looking dog had prevented her from opening the back gate.
I told her it was Winnie who had just spent an hour watching gardeners doing the garden at a neighbours house, " she's obsessed with workmen," I informed my friend " she has a thing for
overalls!"
" dont we all?" my friend replied , looking around our living room with interest.
I realised that she had never been to the cottage before.

I think it's a common thing to be apologetic when someone new " checks out" your house, after all you are more than aware of that blotch on the stair carpet left by a menstruating bulldog, or that mark on the hall corner which signified  an old Welsh terrier's scratching spot, but my friend seemed rather captivated by the " old lady" feel of the place, which the cupboards and shelves filled with objects, photos, books and clutter.
She wandered around the house as if it was a museum.

She loved the paintings, the carlton ware 1930s lobster bowl and the wooden dog toy above the bedroom door. She loved the crockery and the glassware and read titles from the books on the shelves and ran her hand over the wade jug on the chest of drawers.
She wanted to know about the history of the art noveau desk in the living room.
" its lovely" she said and it was nice for me to see the cottage through bright new eyes.

Be Careful What You Wish For

This post supersedes the previous in importance
Still feeling run down, have had to cancel a planned overtime shift tonight
So popped into Marks today and instead of a scotch egg
I bought myself an egg custard tart
( feed a cold starve a fever like they say)
As I walked through the ladies department on the way out,
I managed to get one out of it's wrapping ( a feat in itself as the box was still in the carrier bag)
And just as I left the store I took one blissfully cool bite out of the pastry
before  a fucking seagull swooped in and snatched the rest right out of my hand!

I almost wept

The Power Of Laughter

I have never watched a whole episode of I'm a celebrity, get me out of here!
That kind of screaming reality show leaves me all rather cold.
But last night, all wrapped up with a lem sip , a menstruating bulldog and a roaring fire, I turned on the TV to watch a couple of celebs face the "  hilarious " Bush Tucker Trial .
The trial consists of the celebs being faced with consuming various " disgusting " small meals. to the delight of the baying audience. If the celebs retch or God forbid vomit up their cow anus or kangaroo bollocks the screaming front men Ant & Dec curl themselves up with horrific delight.
It's a depressing spectacle for sure.
Last night the two celebs kind of turned the tables on the whole thing by realising just how ridiculous the contest was.
They literally laughed their way through it!
Carol Vorderman and the wonderfully named Scarlett Moffat exuded warmth and good humour in their scenes together and within minutes I was enjoying their interactions and natural mischievousness much more than the fact they were faced with eating some poor animals arsehole!

The programme underlines that we don't need all this " throwing Christians to the lions"  in order to entertain ourselves.
Watching two friends laughing loud and strong is much more attractive a spectacle in my eyes

Anthropoid and Bulldog knickers

With the Prof away I took myself away to Theatre Clwyd for a " senior citizen" showing of the wartime movie Anthropoid this afternoon.
Things didn't get off to a grand start as the woman in the box office only charged me senior rates rather than regular ( do I look 60?)
Then around an hour into the movie, I had the mother of all coughing fits and had to leave the cinema amid a chorus of tutting from the greyhairs.
I didn't mind too much as the film was rather too dull, to return, so I went to have a look at the gallery instead.

Returning home, it was clear by the state of the floor that Winnie is now back in season. She is presently wearing a pair of the Prof's underpants with the gusset reinforced with toilet paper

See comments about just why she has not been spayed 

Christmas Adverts!

I am thinking of going to my solicitor 

The new Waitrose Christmas tv advert is a direct rip off from this blog entry

http://disasterfilm.blogspot.co.uk/2016/10/a-robin-in-cake-tin.html

But I kinda like this version of the John Lewis bouncy boxer Christmas ad

Clever

For Janice

Janice has just emailed me from Somewhere in Berkshire
Apparantly she enjoyed my recent baby photo and asked in a rather " strange" way to see another photo of me " from my salad days!"
So Janice.....enjoy

ILL

It's a lazy blog today.
I've got some sort of bug which hit home in the middle of the night and I feel like shit.
I'm sure it will pass by tomorrow but today, I feel as though I've been hit by a bus.
I'm coughing so hard that I'm farting like a machine gun!
When I am ill, I look like this......

But feel like this...

I vont to be left alone

How do you cope with illness?
What sort of patient are you?

The Walking Dead Episode 4

This is a slow burn of an episode.
With Negan ( Jeffrey Dean Morgan) wisecracking his way into Alexandria ( his jokes and easy manner already getting on everyone's tits including the audience's) we see "team Rick"reacting to the threat in a somewhat interesting and varied way.
As Carl, Michonne and Rosita bubble away with quiet fury. Father Gabriel cleverly covers Maggie's tracks by showing  Negan a fake grave  ( Negan has already proved himself a talented psychoanalyst by understanding the danger of women scorned)
Rick ( threatened by Daryl and Oliva's deaths) gives away all of Alexandria's weapons and faces the backlash for it even though it is obvious it will buy him and the others some time ....time for perhaps Kingdom and Hilltop to join forces.
I could do without Judith's step dad Andrew Lincoln's goggle eyed overacting but as a stand alone episode this one was an interesting study in psychological warfare, especially as it's the Walking Dead's women who are now stepping up to the plate.