Change Of Subject ( Inc Bake Off Spoilers)

I was saddened to see the funny Northerner Sandy leave the Bake Off tonight. With the best Yorkshire one liners and a smile like a split melon she was a breath of fresh air and will be missed.
Of the survivors I kinda like Nadiya ( she pulls more strange faces than Phyllis Diller) Paul ( it's the goatee) and Tamal ( how cute is he?)
Sad to see that Ian is being set up to be the hated school swot!

On a different note, I will now give a begrudging pat on the back to our local fox. Last night he must of found Bingley's body hidden away under the hawthorn for after my usual morning search, I found the tell tale signs of a trail of turkey feathers leading from the field through the riding stable fields.
For a fox to be able to lift a fully grown, dead weight turkey stag is a feat in itself, to carry it a considerable distance is a real testament to hunger.
Recycling at it's best!

To end with, I shall tell you the subject of tomorrow's post.......

It centres around a potentially disastrous accident...when Winnie Knocked George into the River Elwy then proceeded to fall into the water herself.

My nerves are fucking shot to ribbons

The site of the " incident" 

Domestic Abuse

Yesterday I " witnessed " a particularly nasty situation of domestic abuse.
I and " another" were on the other end of a phone.
We were helpless, and heard the confrontation as if we were characters in a film.
It was horrendous to hear and I am still bothered about it.

Last week in an intirely different situation, in the supermarket checkout , I saw a man in his 60s hurry by with his right hand gripping the back of a woman's neck( I presumed her to be his wife) his left hand was holding her left hand, and they dashed down an aisle. The woman looked worried and in the second I saw them my thoughts flashed from " it's horseplay" to " what's going on?"
Funnily enough I saw both again getting into their car.
He was at the driver's side , she was standing at the passenger door, and he was pointing at her with a stern look like a dad does to a naughty child.
Ok it might of been horseplay like I said, but I felt uncomfortable enough to stand there and stare until both had driven off.

I wish now, I had called out to ask if she was ok.

860

My follower numbers have been up and down like a whore's knickers over the past week
And it's bugging me..... 860....863.....861.....now 860
Just lets round it off to 900 and be done with it......
Alternatively everyone just round it off to 800
It's irritating my slightly obsessive nature...............and my brittle ego
If you're staying , for fanny's sake just stay

News

For the Prof ( who will be getting slightly homesick )
Village News over the past week

• Ann M...The surprise winner of the novelty vegetable class in the Flower Show is still surprisingly posting Facebook photos of her winning minion in odd situations .....it's a case of rubbing your facebook in it......
• Affable Despots Claire and Jason have been away on holiday, so I have been feeding their goldfish for a week.........I thought their strategic placement of his " 2nd In Show" smiling shit novelty vegetable RIGHT NEXT TO THE FISHTANK was a bit rich....I made a point of stabbing it in the head with one of their kitchen knives. I'm sure his two impressionable young children found the stabbing amusing 
• I've noted with some amusement that the minutes of the community council meetings have still not been posted on the village noticeboard since a meeting in the spring. I suspect the slightly bumbling Clerk is still catching up with amendments from the Later meetings.......for locals information the latest exciting updates can be seen on line at http://www.gwaenysgorandtrelawnyd.org.uk/community-council-minutes/
• Auntie Gladys has been somewhat perturbed by the loss of a piece of knitting!  During the meelee of the Show , one of  Blogger Anne Marie's entries in the art section was sadly mislaid and was thought to be sold by accident. Gladys braved the bad weather to bring me down some knitting that she had found in her bric-a-brac collection . Unfortunately her eyesight is still not brilliant and what she thought was a knitted shawl turned out to be a crochet tablecloth.
• The new couple and their sons who have recently moved into the old Police house seem very nice and very community minded. She's especially chatty!
• The Crown pub is still shut up after the mystery moonlight flit by the last lacklustre manager .(when the flat screen tv and the slot machine takings suddenly went missing)...I wonder if anyone else has heard what's happening there ? Answers on a postcard please
• I have finally got old Trevor connected to BT sports on line last night ( and I missed the lovely Victoria Coren-Mitchell in ONLY CONNECT doing it)..... it took me a bloody age as his computer seems to be that old it's driven by steam . He has asked me to ask the Prof if they can go shopping for a new one together......he'll buy lunch at Sainsbury's cafe no less......( you can-have what you want from the menu he says!)- go on stuff yourself
• Mrs Trellis is fine, busy and happy with her whippet Cross Blue and I saw Gay Gordon and Big Mary outside Marks the other day! I note she's on piped oxygen now...and is I see a not so big Mary :( 
• Oh, I've just cleaned the Church this morning...... Note to the vicar " your hoover is shite!"

Every time I clean the Church, I have the overwhelming urge to ring the bell!

Hairy Faces

A slightly older shot of The Prof in his Sunday Best

A Woman I worked with last night confessed that she spied The Prof at the train station recently.
" I gave him a very close inspection " she shared in a stage whisper
" And what did you find out?" I asked her.
" Well! " , she said " He's very....... Hummm V E R Y .......well GROOMED!"
I was suddenly very conscious that my hair was sticking up at the back and that there was a stray coffee stain on the front of my uniform"
" Not a hair out of place on his wonderful moustache ! " she waxed lyrically " and  soooo beautifully turned out"
Apparently my husband is , what can be termed as, a " mature hispter"
Another , more straight talking, slightly older nurse overheard the conversation and piped up helpfully
" You're NOT alike are you"
" Afraid not!" I agreed.
I was thinking about this in tescos today...I had just picked  a 5 £ t shirt for the Australia trip and I was debating whether to try it on or not.
No one, I thought, would ever call me a hipster , mature or otherwise.
A two tone goatee in a shit t shirt?........it's not a sophisticated look.


Now I kind of like this beard thing that's going on at the moment. Every man I see seems to be sporting some level of facial hair, groomed or otherwise, and it IS interesting to see the fashions rewinding back to those of Edwardian Britain.

Hairy faces suit men I think.......and shhhhhhh don't tell anyone but goatees hide double chins.......

OMG

What's the most exciting thing that has happened today?

Well I'll bloody well tell you

In the hysteria of chasing a sparrow around the bathroom

Albert has knocked two " full" toilet rolls down the bog

A toilet that I had just used

But HADN'T FLUSHED !

Omg The Horror!

I'm off to bed

48 Hours of Film

What Do you do when your husband is away?
Watch movies!
Loved my Lisbeth Salander trio.....8/10 ......the french "stranger"was  porn but wonderfully deep ( 9/10)  and so FRENCH but Eve won by 10 points! And then some xxx

Chris Pratt sigh

What I've watched....

The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo ( 2009) Swedish version as the two sequels!

The Girl That Played With Fire (2009)

The Girl That Kicked The Hornet's Nest ( 2009)

Stranger By The Lake ( 2013) French title"L'Inconnu du lac" classy porn

Non Stop (2014) - shit but has Lady Mary in it!

All About Eve ( 1950)

21 Grams ( 2003)

Sideways (2004)
Les Choristes (2004) -I Cried
The Poseidon Adventure ( 1972)- fun
Dabba 2013 uk title " The Lunch Box" - a wonderful Indian movie !
Guardians Of the universe (2014)

I miss my husband x

Why Do They Do This?

It's always puzzles me that most animals nearing the end of their lives like to take themselves to a corner of this earth away from all others in order to die in darkness and peace.
Last night , during a rainstorm I shut all of the animals up in their houses as usual.
I hadn't checked if all were occupied...I presumed that they were.
Bingley never wandered more than ten feet away from his green painted home, he never needed to.
This morning, as usual, I opened them all up again only to find Bingley's house silent and empty.
Sometime yesterday, he had taken himself off to some bush or ditch somewhere in the field, even though his legs were shaky and his balance was off.
I searched for him , but I could find nothing . Not even a feather to signal that a fox or the nightly badger sows had found him . But the hawthorn hedges are now overgrown in their summer green and I would need a machete to search for him properly.

And so, I decided to leave well alone, it was his time to wander off to die.
That's the nature of things