Mundane Monday

It's going to be a mundane post today

It's going to be a mundane day

For today it's carpet cleaning day 

Yaaaayyyyyy

It's a necessary evil of living in the country and having 20 paws in the house

 When the carpet cleaner comes out

the animals retreat to their favorite places

They know what to expect

Noise and muddy water

All day

Albert hides away on his superman onesie cat bed

William is up on the couch

George is in bed

Meg is in the bedroom window

And Winnie watches the wold from the garden

If You Don't Follow THE WALKING DEAD look away now

Sigh

24 hours and it returns!
If anyone bothers me at 9pm tomorrow night
they are zombie meat

Has Judith survived her bloody baby seat?

How will Daryl cope with a needy Beth?

What has Bob got in his friggin box?

Where the sod is Carol?
Will Rick ever master a real Atlanta accent?
Will Tara the token lesbian survive?
And

Will Tyreese sing " this old man" with the kids?
answers on a postcard

Hey ho

Paso

I don't watch  the tv programme Dancing On Ice

I can't think of anything worse

But I did remember Torvill & Dean doing the Paso

Way back in 1984

Cracking!

Harry Windsor : a ginger cock in need of Valium

Another day, another storm from the west. The Ukrainian village has never been so  wet or as dirty, yet despite the muck and the water, the resident hens and the refugees have been laying well all winter.

The only flash of real colour amid the brown and the muddy green has been a brighter ginger streak that is Harry Windsor.

Harry Windsor, like his namesake is second in life's pecking order. He is second in command to the permanently scowling Moriarty and spends most of his adolescent days galloping away from the alpha cockerel in a state of nervous exhaustion.

Such is the way of the world in hen land

Come the spring, when Harry has put on a few more pounds

There will be a stand off between the two

And a peace will reign on the field

But for now, Harry ,

Poor Harry continues his muddy and constant jog to safety

Stitches

David's mother

I finally caught up with my friend Nige last night. We swapped belated Christmas gifts. I gave him a home knitted ( by  chris)  scarf and a Banksey calendar. He presented me with a first for me.... A graphic novel.

Now, all I do know about graphic novels, is that they are usually horror based ( like the original The Walking Dead  series) and usually enjoyed by young men who can't be arsed reading a book.

Graphic novels can be generally described as storyboards similar to the ones used to preempt filming on a movie. They capture the story cinematically, with perhaps a few " bubble" quotes or brief sentence of explanation and rely on the talent of the artist to Push the story forward.

Nigel's choice of Christmas pressie was, I admit, just a little odd, but it has proved to be an extraordinary " read"

Stitches- a memoir is the  true story of an abusive childhood in middle class 1950s Detroit .Seen through the eyes of six then eleven year old David, we are introduced to dysfunctional parents an abusive maternal grandmother and family secrets centered around illness, insanity and depression.

Atmospherically and economically sketched Stitches is a profoundly moving  and raw story seen from a child's perspective.

I really recommend it.

But do read it when you are emotionally robust

David's grandmother

Bunty Returns

I am off to see my friend Nige in Manchester this evening

So I have been a bit on catch up all day.

At lunchtime there was a lusty knock on the door

It was Bunty, the lesbian smallholder 

She had no geese with her, it was only a social call

" the Bastards" she told me had finally settled down and had been sexed by a local farmer who thought they were both

females ....subsequently she had renamed them

" Ellen and Portia"

I can't say I was surprised

Bunty was full of her geese

And she reminded me of Rosie O Donnell the way she laughed about them

Big lusty laughs!

" Did you know?" She said in her big deep voice

"When a goose gets sick' when they are migrating ,two geese drop out of formation and follow 

It down to the ground to protect it"

Well you learn something new everyday!

The nearest likeness I could find for Bunty

I hope she doesn't mind

Pies & Scones

Today's offering a meat and potato pie

I am a plain to average cook

But I can knock out a good pie when the need arises

This surprises me as I have hot little fat hands

The hands of a serial killer , I have been told.

My grandmother always told me that you needed cold hands for good pastry

Today I was going to ask auntie Glad what the real secret of " good pastry" when I dropped off

Some duck eggs on my rounds but as it turned out, I didn't.

She had received some bad news from the doctor about her eye sight

and as usual, all she was thinking about , was other people

" Tell Chris  I won't be able to make scones for him anymore" 

She said with a sad faraway look

I got you babe

Just been flicking  through the on line tabloids

And was a bit surprised with this photo

Cher looks a bit rough!