Friday, 7 February 2014

Bunty Returns

I am off to see my friend Nige in Manchester this evening
So I have been a bit on catch up all day.
At lunchtime there was a lusty knock on the door
It was Bunty, the lesbian smallholder 
She had no geese with her, it was only a social call
" the Bastards" she told me had finally settled down and had been sexed by a local farmer who thought they were both
females ....subsequently she had renamed them
" Ellen and Portia"
I can't say I was surprised
Bunty was full of her geese
And she reminded me of Rosie O Donnell the way she laughed about them
Big lusty laughs!
" Did you know?" She said in her big deep voice
"When a goose gets sick' when they are migrating ,two geese drop out of formation and follow 
It down to the ground to protect it"
Well you learn something new everyday!

The nearest likeness I could find for Bunty
I hope she doesn't mind

48 comments:

  1. "It was Bunty, the lesbian smallholder" Please tell me WHY you do not yet have a reality show of your own?!? The characters have all been cast, the scripts could easily be written by a Midlife Farmwife in Illinois who has been following you for years...what are you waiting for? An agent? I'll see what I can do.

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    1. I was about to ask the same question, Donna. 'All Genders Great and Small' would be a good pitch. John has got it in the bag already - I really mean that! The least he could do is borrow a sound recorder to do a pilot. Think about it John - this could be your retirement plan!

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    2. I just need to write as well as you tom, then everything's in the bag

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  2. Thank GOD she didn't bring the geese back with her.

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  3. Isn't Bunty the best name ? ….. and, by the sound's of it, it really suits her. I already have a mental picture of her …. a mixture of Miriam Margolyes { in character } and those women that Jennifer Saunders and Dawn French play !!
    By the way, that first photo of you on your sidebar is wonderful. I've been thinking that it was a character from an American film ot TV series … you look gorgeous !!
    Have a great time in Manchester. XXXX

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    1. Bunty actually resembles a softer and younger philip Seymour Hoffman.....
      And tee hee about the photo
      It ISNT ME
      ITS the actor Richard Harrington from the welsh tv series HINTERLAND........
      TEE HEE

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    2. BUT ….. it really looks like you……. I feel a right wally now !! XXXX

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    3. You beast!! I thought W.W. had worked miracles:)

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    4. Oh... now he tells us...

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    5. I was sucked in...does that translate?

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    6. Thank goodness I wasn't the only one ……. I thought that Gok Wan had got his hands on you !! XXXX

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    7. Someone called 'Bunty' just HAS to be a great addition to the Trelawnyd menagerie.

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  4. Bunty is the name of two lesbian friends' of mine's chihuahua. I'll leave it there.

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    Replies
    1. At least it was a chihuahua and nit a beaver

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  5. Does Bunty look like Felicity Kendal in the Good Life? Wasn't Bunty the name of a girl's comic? She sounds a great character.

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  6. Seymour Hoffman (and I am gutted) is barely cold and now his likeness is that of Bunty. I don't think Bunty and I would get on. There'd be a power struggle. One which I will most likely win - on points if not looks. She won't like it. And then what. Only consolation that Lesbians never give me so much as a wink. Yes, that hetero and scary I am. Don't say there aren't benefits to being me.

    U

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  7. so the Bastards be Bitches....Must not be an easy task to sex them!

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    Replies
    1. I think they are ganders myself x

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  8. did winnie run and hide from bunty again?

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    Replies
    1. No she was all over her like a rash.... She was sat on the sofa this time though

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  9. I am LOVING Bunty....next time you meet you should encourage her to blog...she has a ready-made following here already....

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  10. I learn something new from your blog nearly every day John!

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  11. Funnily enough, that's exactly how I pictured her.

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    Replies
    1. A bit line a chunky claire balding

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  12. I wonder if Bunty will ever know that we call her geese bastards?!!!

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    Replies
    1. Oh I told her on day one

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  13. nearly the walking dead, *squeal*

    saw this thought of you

    http://www.quickmeme.com/p/3vs53a

    hope the link works

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    Replies
    1. What a lovely gesture xxxx

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  14. "I hope she doesn't mind???????" I would hang myself if I was compared to that!

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  15. There is a lovely rendition of Agatha Christies "a murder is announced" and I have this picture of Bunty looking like the very amusing Hinchcliff!
    (Paola Dionisotti is the actress)

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    Replies
    1. I know the actress.....a little too old for Bunty and dare I say around 2 stone lighter

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  16. Poor Phil, now shown to us to describe a brassy, fun broad. Could be worse.
    Whenever I read "Bunty" I think of the drunk character on an episode of "Keeping Up Appearances" who was looking for her gun-shy bitch. LOL

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    Replies
    1. Off to YouTube that one

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    2. Let me know if you found it.

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  17. Is that Philip Seymour Hoffman? He died at the beginning of the week. Heroin overdose. Needle still in his arm.

    Love,
    Janie

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    Replies
    1. The one and only x

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    2. small sob and then an outburst over people taking heroin or crack or whatever

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  18. I love reading your blog. I read everyday. This may sound weird but the way you write leaves me feeling "settled'..."easy"..always with a smile. Thanks for blogging.....

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    1. So sweet xxx thank you xxx

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  19. I rather picture Clarissa Dickson-Wright whenever you mention Bunty!!!

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    1. Yes...now you come to mention it....... She does mind you Bunty is 30 years younger

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  20. Bunty was my favourite girls comic when I was growing up, I used to spend ages cutting up the back page to dress the paper 'doll', then I sulked because I had cut out the last page of my story!!

    It's a brilliant name for the latest character in your forthcoming autobiography :-)

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    1. I remember pansy potter

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  21. Goodness I love this log !

    cheers, parsnip

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  22. Thank you so much for update on Bunty and the Bastards. Bless her!

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  23. Ellen and Portia....perfect.

    Bunty sounds like the boisterous aunt in Harry Potter--visiting the Dursley family.

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