I am off to see my friend Nige in Manchester this evening
So I have been a bit on catch up all day.
At lunchtime there was a lusty knock on the door
It was Bunty, the lesbian smallholder
She had no geese with her, it was only a social call
" the Bastards" she told me had finally settled down and had been sexed by a local farmer who thought they were both
females ....subsequently she had renamed them
" Ellen and Portia"
I can't say I was surprised
Bunty was full of her geese
And she reminded me of Rosie O Donnell the way she laughed about them
Big lusty laughs!
" Did you know?" She said in her big deep voice
"When a goose gets sick' when they are migrating ,two geese drop out of formation and follow
It down to the ground to protect it"
Well you learn something new everyday!
The nearest likeness I could find for Bunty
I hope she doesn't mind
"It was Bunty, the lesbian smallholder" Please tell me WHY you do not yet have a reality show of your own?!? The characters have all been cast, the scripts could easily be written by a Midlife Farmwife in Illinois who has been following you for years...what are you waiting for? An agent? I'll see what I can do.
ReplyDeleteI was about to ask the same question, Donna. 'All Genders Great and Small' would be a good pitch. John has got it in the bag already - I really mean that! The least he could do is borrow a sound recorder to do a pilot. Think about it John - this could be your retirement plan!
DeleteI just need to write as well as you tom, then everything's in the bag
DeleteThank GOD she didn't bring the geese back with her.
ReplyDeleteIsn't Bunty the best name ? ….. and, by the sound's of it, it really suits her. I already have a mental picture of her …. a mixture of Miriam Margolyes { in character } and those women that Jennifer Saunders and Dawn French play !!
ReplyDeleteBy the way, that first photo of you on your sidebar is wonderful. I've been thinking that it was a character from an American film ot TV series … you look gorgeous !!
Have a great time in Manchester. XXXX
Bunty actually resembles a softer and younger philip Seymour Hoffman.....
DeleteAnd tee hee about the photo
It ISNT ME
ITS the actor Richard Harrington from the welsh tv series HINTERLAND........
TEE HEE
BUT ….. it really looks like you……. I feel a right wally now !! XXXX
DeleteYou beast!! I thought W.W. had worked miracles:)
DeleteOh... now he tells us...
DeleteI was sucked in...does that translate?
DeleteThank goodness I wasn't the only one ……. I thought that Gok Wan had got his hands on you !! XXXX
DeleteSomeone called 'Bunty' just HAS to be a great addition to the Trelawnyd menagerie.
DeleteBunty is the name of two lesbian friends' of mine's chihuahua. I'll leave it there.
ReplyDeleteAt least it was a chihuahua and nit a beaver
DeleteDoes Bunty look like Felicity Kendal in the Good Life? Wasn't Bunty the name of a girl's comic? She sounds a great character.
ReplyDeleteSeymour Hoffman (and I am gutted) is barely cold and now his likeness is that of Bunty. I don't think Bunty and I would get on. There'd be a power struggle. One which I will most likely win - on points if not looks. She won't like it. And then what. Only consolation that Lesbians never give me so much as a wink. Yes, that hetero and scary I am. Don't say there aren't benefits to being me.
ReplyDeleteU
so the Bastards be Bitches....Must not be an easy task to sex them!
ReplyDeleteI think they are ganders myself x
Deletedid winnie run and hide from bunty again?
ReplyDeleteNo she was all over her like a rash.... She was sat on the sofa this time though
DeleteI am LOVING Bunty....next time you meet you should encourage her to blog...she has a ready-made following here already....
ReplyDeleteCompetition? Never!
DeleteI learn something new from your blog nearly every day John!
ReplyDeleteFunnily enough, that's exactly how I pictured her.
ReplyDeleteA bit line a chunky claire balding
DeleteI wonder if Bunty will ever know that we call her geese bastards?!!!
ReplyDeleteOh I told her on day one
Deletenearly the walking dead, *squeal*
ReplyDeletesaw this thought of you
http://www.quickmeme.com/p/3vs53a
hope the link works
What a lovely gesture xxxx
Delete"I hope she doesn't mind???????" I would hang myself if I was compared to that!
ReplyDeleteShhhhhhhhhh
DeleteThere is a lovely rendition of Agatha Christies "a murder is announced" and I have this picture of Bunty looking like the very amusing Hinchcliff!
ReplyDelete(Paola Dionisotti is the actress)
I know the actress.....a little too old for Bunty and dare I say around 2 stone lighter
DeletePoor Phil, now shown to us to describe a brassy, fun broad. Could be worse.
ReplyDeleteWhenever I read "Bunty" I think of the drunk character on an episode of "Keeping Up Appearances" who was looking for her gun-shy bitch. LOL
Off to YouTube that one
DeleteLet me know if you found it.
DeleteIs that Philip Seymour Hoffman? He died at the beginning of the week. Heroin overdose. Needle still in his arm.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Janie
The one and only x
Deletesmall sob and then an outburst over people taking heroin or crack or whatever
DeleteI love reading your blog. I read everyday. This may sound weird but the way you write leaves me feeling "settled'..."easy"..always with a smile. Thanks for blogging.....
ReplyDeleteSo sweet xxx thank you xxx
DeleteI rather picture Clarissa Dickson-Wright whenever you mention Bunty!!!
ReplyDeleteYes...now you come to mention it....... She does mind you Bunty is 30 years younger
DeleteBunty was my favourite girls comic when I was growing up, I used to spend ages cutting up the back page to dress the paper 'doll', then I sulked because I had cut out the last page of my story!!
ReplyDeleteIt's a brilliant name for the latest character in your forthcoming autobiography :-)
I remember pansy potter
DeleteGoodness I love this log !
ReplyDeletecheers, parsnip
Thank you so much for update on Bunty and the Bastards. Bless her!
ReplyDeleteEllen and Portia....perfect.
ReplyDeleteBunty sounds like the boisterous aunt in Harry Potter--visiting the Dursley family.