A Fox At A Funeral

My head count is complete, and as far as I can tell there has been only one casualty during our holiday.

Last Friday right in the middle of the funeral of a lady from High Street, the guinea Fowl started their screaming. One of the guys who tends to the new Graveyard that overlooks my field was there and  was amazed to see a dog fox trotting slowly over the riding stables fields with a hen in it's mouth. The graveyard was full of people and the riding stables field was filled with horses which skittered around the fox nervously and with typical horsey challenges, but the fox seemed totally blatant and unmoved by anything that was going on and carried on regardless.

Only one hen..... it could have been a whole lot worse.

The turkeys and ducks under the watchful eye of Eirlys all returned wide eyed and healthy, and the blind Rooster Cogburn actually flourished under the watchful eye of neighbours Mike and Viv, who now seem to have a real soft spot for the blind old rooster, and I couldn't help but notice that they had scrubbed his feeding bowls to a shine only seen on my mother's silver teapot.

I was very grateful for all of my "volunteers'" hard work and despite all of their protestations I made sure all of them received some wine,miniature food hampers or chocolates.

The Welsh terriers returned from their boarding kennels in a much more sorry state than any of the field animals have looked this morning. Both stank of poo when they despirately clambered up into the berlingo when I picked them at at 9am and only when we got home did I notice both with dried faeces matted haphazardly  in their fur.

Not a good advertisement for the local and much lauded establishment eh?

Uncharacteristically for me I have not rang the kennels as yet to complain.. I must be filled with some post holiday good humour....but be sure I will be contacting the place very soon...I just need to get my Bette Davis head on for the confrontation!

I will catch up with some blog reading tonight.... It will be nice to sit by the fire ( those 30 degree Sitges days seem a very long way away now) with a needy Welsh terrier on my knee..... and catch up with some news

Back to Trelawnyd....Back to Normality

Holiday Photo at the Santa Maria (pre lamb chops)

It has been lovely

6 days of good food (Baby Lamb chops to die for at The Santa Maria)

6 days of Good Reading ( I actually caught up with Truman Capote's Breakfast at Tiffany's for the first time and LOVED IT)

6 days of Wonderful relaxation ( we never left the beach except to eat, pee and sleep)

and a chance for me NOT to feel like earth mother to 78 animals and for Dr Chris not to feel that everything revolves around a University computer.

Suffice to say, we had a lovely time....

I have felt spoilt to hell...he has recharged the old little grey cells and both of us have been reminded that we are just two old farts that love the same things in life.

Sitges in Spain has always retained some of it's old world charm, and the town seems to have a celebration, a parade and a festival for every bloody occasion!
when we were there, there was a wine festival, some sort of political parade ( which comprised of 50 school kids banging drums for 3 f*CKING hours!) and a gay "bears" weekend.....(where a load of fat, bearded and cheerful old queens from all over Europe descended on the town for some serious moustache twirling and drunken bouts of singing popular "hits from the shows" at 3am in the morning- most of them right outside our hotel window )

Anyhow apart from meeting the family for a few meals ( my elder sister, her hubby, my sister in law , my nephew and his wife and daughter had all decided to go to the "family "hotel when we were there!), we did very little but relax and "watch the world go by"

.....DID I TELL YOU IT WAS LOVELY?

me. sis. sister in law Jayne and bro  in law Tim

well it was.......

Anyhow we are back in blightly and I have started the long process of "counting the animals home" so to speak

So far Albert had reintroduced himself from his week alone with some uncharacteristic yowling and head rubbing and George has returned cheerfully from my sister's home where he has been spoilt rotten out of his little Scottish Terrier mind...

tomorrow I will count the field animals against my mental check list to see if any are missing and then I will and pick up the straggler animals from Eilys and William and Meg from the dog kennels and then and ONLY then, will I be back to normal......
* and YES I am covering my double chin

Still Alive

and very well

Coredo Vestido de Coredo

I am wearing my new shorts, new (non green) beach shoes, new overly tight T shirt and my Olympic track suit top
Dr Chris has just looked me up and down slowly before we leave for the airport
He shakes his head
"What's the Spanish for Mutton Dressed As Lamb?" he sighs

Blue Skies

The Calm before the storm The Trelawnyd Glebe

The Hysterical Runners led by the hybrid drake Halleh have screamed their last hysterical screams on the field for a week. Some of the silly buggers have known me for over four years but still they shriek lilke little girls as soon as they register anything new within a mile's radius of the field.
( and when I say new.....I mean even me wearing a hat they have not seen before!)

"arrrrhhhhhhhhhhh run.....run for the hills!!!"

I always have the urge to do something drastic when they start

Hummm perhaps it was an unfortunate choice of video seeing that the older I get, the more nervous I get about flying......I wonder why that is?

At least we are not "suffering" the orange skinned, scouse harshness of the  Easy Jet cabin Crew and the  filling "common as muck" free-for-all fight so we can actually sit together before some uninterested stewardess throws a hard bun in a piece of cellophane at us for a fiver a go!

In my experience the cheapness of Easy Jet never quite balances out the fraught look on Chris' face when the bunfight run for seats start at the very beginning of his much earned holiday break.....

His expression says it all

"It was never like this in Miss Marple's day"

and he would be right

We are flying British Airways.

And so I am off now to sort out some frozen pork to share out amongst the kind suckers that have kindly agreed to care for the Bwthyn-y-llan animals...without them all, I would have to be content with a day trip to Llandudno.

So I give a big thank you to you all

Janet and Ned (who are taking in George)

Eirlys & John ( Bingley,Theresa,Carol Polenta and the runners)

Mike and Viv ( The blind Rooster Cogburn, Phyllis Diller and  abandoned cockerel Buster)

Islwyn ( hens & geese and house sitting and security matters)

Mandy (water distribution and security jobs)

John F (Water Butt filling and paddling pool care)

Carol ( Albert feeding and rabbit corpse removal)

See you all on our return......I will try and drop a quick blog when we're out there

Even Gentleman like tv Zombie Shows

Now for those that have missed the unending stories of chicken woes and turkey tales, tomorrow's post will be heavily centred upon the story of the somewhat deafening transport of the hysterical runners from my field to the safety of my friend Eirlys' farm for the duration of our jaunt to Sitges.

Carol and Polenta, Bingley and Theresa will be going too, which will, I am sure be a load off the mind of hen babysitter Islwyn who may be a bit long in the tooth to fend off a hormonal stag turkey or to be charging around after runner ducks that spend their lives jumping and screaming at the top of their lungs as soon as anyone farts in their direction

 

Today's post is going to be somewhat of a geek fest!

Now I make no bones that I am a somewhat sad fan of the zombie/disaster flick series The Walking Dead...I think I can control this obsession as I know I am not quite at that bedroom living/hamburger munching/same t shirt and underpants all-week wearing /sad bastard level of geekdom just yet!

(no I am NOT!)

However I do frequent some websites and blogs that celebrate the zombie apocalypse (like you do) and one of my favourites must be Lee Sargent's The Gentleman's Guide To The Zombie Apocalypse

This talented blog is a light hearted romp into the rules in post Zombie invasion survival....and his entry today ticked me somewhat because he featured me and George in one of his cartoons!

 "Now.....where's that hamburger?"

Public Speaking

I am not a big fan of public speaking.

I can do it at a push, and I thank my father's genes for the ability to do so...for he would have made a speech in the queue at Tescos if people would have let him. 

I am thinking about this subject today as I have been asked to give two "talks" to the local Women's Institute this Autumn...I think that they want a sort of precis of all the best bits from Going Gently , ....humorous and touching animal stories aka James Herriot...that sounds safe enough..... me thinks

Years ago, I once was asked to present a paper to several hundred delegates at a conference in The Royal National Orthopaedic Hospital in Stanmore.

The subject matter was emotive to say the least, as it was a personal account of how the ward staff and I , as ward manager, coped with a particularly "challenging", suicidal and acutely mentally ill patient in the inappropriate setting of a general spinal injury ward.

My account, in my mind was pitched just right. It was honest, reflective and dare I say interesting, and as I had practised the whole presentation a hundred times, the whole thing tripped off the tongue as easily as if I was a radio 4 news presenter!

Unfortunately I was wearing a body mike ( a new experience for me) and after I had finished my emotive account with a fairly dramatic flourish, the audience broke into an impressive and enthusiastic round of applause..........

I gestured towards them all with a dignified and professional nod,  and after I walked slowly ( and dramatically) to my seat to sit down. I caught the eye of Sharman Bibby who was an Occupational Therapist that I knew well.. She smiled and mouthed "phew" at me and I replied with a somewhat relieved "FUCK---------ING  hell" ....

Yes... you've guessed it.... The body mike was still on!

So, this morning, I must reassure Pat (who is the secretary of the local WI)......there will be no swearing!
I promise

Now, where's my list?

I feel somewhat jet lagged today

I was on night shift Saturday night

Yesterday was a night off

Am on  shift again tonight

My body ( 50 years old and somewhat jaded)

Is feeling the strain.

we fly to Sitges on Friday morning

Holiday checklist has just been written this am

I do like my lists

1) Animal care plans all written and laminated

2) White Underwear ( not the usual grey ones) (  and the new ones -without any holes in the gussets!) all folded and all ready for flying (just in case of a crash)

3) Pretentious Holiday reading obtained

4) Trashy Holiday reading ( to be read out of sight of others) obtained

5) Holiday shorts, walking dead T shirt, and new (non green) beach shoes all placed in a neat pile (we all love a new "travelling outfit)

6) Passport finally found after a hysterical, hyperventilating search

7) Imodium capsules located ( just in case)

8) Teaching sessions started for conscripted animals carers

9) 14 new " to do" lists written out and re written

10) Emergency Euros ordered

11) Check computer 100 times for Sitges weather report

12) Build up for a humdinger of a pre holiday row!

Ok I am ready!