Going Gently

Sunrise sunset

I’ve seen the Devine Midler in New York and her version of Sunrise Sunset will capture a lovely moment I had on a gay streaming app earlier in the week

I was feeling rather flat and chatted to Polish actor and theatrical director Dominek about our favourite pieces of theatre

Fiddler on the Roof came up and suddenly we found ourselves singing the pivotal Sunrise Sunset a song that reflects on growing up, of family, community and of faith.

He with a tea towel on his head me with a pair of oyster oven gloves wrapped over my ears, it was a joyful moment of madness which brightened the mood

It’s so good to laugh, I only wish I’d videoed it

Apple Fest

Roger and I got to the festival slightly late because of night shift

Lovely video by Kelda, and well supported given the atrocious weather

Roger cuddled Mrs Trellis ( who was on wash up detail) when I had a cup of tea and a egg bab )

Lovers of Hitchcock and his ability to film an ordinary hero types well out of his depth will enjoy Kasia Adamik’s Cold War thriller Winter Of The Crow . Set in 1981 against the backdrop of Poland’s martial law Winter, we follow the unlikely tail of prissy 60 something psychiatrist Joan ( Lesley Manville) who has been invited by revolting university students to lecture on her special treatments of schizophrenic patients . As the tanks roll in, Joan is trapped in the faceless industrial hinterland with no passport, no translator and after witnessing a murder of a student activist and with the military police at her heels. She is drawn into a cat and mouse chase in a snowy Warsaw.

The film is a bit uneven, even unbelievable at times, but as the intellectual Joan , who suddenly has to rely on her physical strength, guile and cunning, Manville is a real delight, and as we entered the excruciating. Scene where she physically fights her police protagonist to the death , Hitchcock would have been very proud .

I needed a day away from Wales today . Last night I went to book club, and mein Host got himself into such a flap as only three people out of eight turned up and he’d made a ton of tapas , it was painful to deal with his adult tantrum. I decided I’m not going again

Jesus! Fucking queens !

I found the following photo of Mary’s welcome to Bwthyn y llan

My dear girl ……

6 Years

This is my favourite photograph of Trelawnyd

It’s a photo of some of my favourite people not the buildings

Of course I can add many more to these numbers to be sure,

But here is a hard core so to speak

Facebook reminded me this photo was taken 6 years ago

At the height of Covid, when the velvet voiced Linda ( far left) organised the village warden group with some charm and grace into a well oiled machine for good, helped ably by a backroom team of dozens

I had the photo framed as a thank you to Linda and she has it in her front room

An example what how essentially good ordinary people are

Linoprint

Ma Manley has produced another linoprint of Trelawnyd Church

I didn’t sleep today after work, and finally got up around 2pm for coffee.

I’m sat at the kitchen table, nursing a mug as a gaggle of Canada Geese fly over the village honking loudly.

I miss the sleek lines of Camilla Parker Bowles ( the goose not the Queen to be)

Her dark plumage always reminded me of seal skin

It’s the apple festival on Saturday and I’m off so will go

A live screening of Manon is on in the cinema too

Loved The Archers tonight , Vince trapped under a tree in a storm with only the valiant Chelsea Horrobin to help…radio 4 at its best…not a special effect in sight

Hill House

Adapted from Shirley Jacksons best seller and the 1963 film version The Haunting, The Haunting Of Hill House is a suitably spooky and rather chilling piece of theatre. Set during a paranormal research month, an empty, supposedly haunted house is studied by Dr Montigue and his wife ( Jasper Britten and Gemma Churchill) and along to help is sassy lesbian Theodora ( Sophie Lenglinger) the house’s soon to be owner Luke ( Robin Morissey) and the brittle, griefing but psychic Eleanor ( Clancy Ryan ) and as they explore the house’s secrets they are faced with some increasingly frightening paranormal experiences as well as Eleanor’s disintegrating psychi and mental health.

I loved it, as it was a real cinematic romp with lighting and video experts Chris Davy and Duncan McClean providing a real sense of a warping and surreal gothic American house, in between well acted and dramatic set pieces.

The visual effects were truly impressive!

Some wonderfully playfully special effects added to the horror, and I must admit to be baffled when an innocuous shoulder wrap suddenly leapt from the floor to fly with pinpoint precision to land perfectly centred around Eleanor’s neck.

A wonderful bit of theatre

Clancy Ryan as the harried Eleanor was a find as was Sophie Lenginger as Theodora and both gave every bit of a performance as Julie Harris and Claire Bloom did in the film version but without the true and necessary hysteria

My sister Janet came with me and left me with this message when she got home

Scared the shir out of myself driving home ..leaving Trelawyd I switched to full beam...hurtling along at 40mph I must have twisted the stick with out realising ( I don't drive at night tbf ) and was plunged into darkness ..panicking I couldn't get the back on ..my legs were like jelly when I got home lol

The German would have loved it

My Best Blog: The Resurrected Rubber Chicken

Old Mary and her chicken

Yesterday I bought Mary a rubber chicken

I couldn’t really justify its £4.95 price ticket

But I thought what the hell.

The old gal used to love Rubber chickens when she was a youngster

I cried when she played with it for an age ….

As she suddenly lost her blindness and aching legs

She was a puppy again

Who took the chicken to bed during Celebrity Traitors

Winnie and Mary with the original chicken

Again , I’m in nostalgia mode ,

I am reminded of Winifred and her beloved rubber chicken

See this blog entry from 2020

“Winnie’s Rubber Chicken is being framed for eternity .

I have thought this strange thought ever since I found rubber chicken next to Winnie on the kitchen floor just before Christmas. It’s kind of become synonymous with my dear old girl.

I rang the picture framer the day before yesterday, (the one I’ve used for years ) and asked if it was possible to do

“ You want to frame a rubber chicken behind glass” the picture framer repeated slowly after I had thrown the proposal to him

“ Yes” I told him cheerfully “ it was Winnie’s favourite “

The fact , that he might think that this question was in any way odd surprised me, after all I could have rang him with the request that he framed the last surviving slipper of sex, which I had incidentally found amid a ton of fluff under the bed only a month ago

The picture framer then ventured into territory he wasn’t quite prepared for.

“Do you want an insert into the frame some wording .” He asked

Oh that’s a good idea” I told him. “What about the following”

“ Winifred Salote Taupo III Queen of Tonga 200? - 2020 “

There was a long silence on the other end of the phone

“ I think we can do that “ the picture framer said finally and rather weakly

He then paused, obviously thinking

“ What colour frame would you like ? “ he asked

“ Pink!” I announced loudly

“ Of course!” he sighed “ Of Course you do “

Tonight I’m going to Theatr Clwyd to see the thriller “ The Haunting Of Hill House”

The German is intrigued

Girls Girls and Girls

Elizabeth Spriggs

I had to laugh the other day.

Someone described Going Gently as a "woman's" blog......

They also mentioned in no uncertain terms that it was homophobic, which is an interesting take on a sixty four year homosexual with a dog called Roger, but I will leave that argument well and truly alone.

I am not bothered that Going Gently could be seen as "feminine"...given the content I will take that description as a compliment.....as I have always enjoyed the company of women to that of men. Now I can do "men" as it were, friendshipwise, be sure on that! Out of perhaps nine close friends I have, four are male and out of those only one is gay, (another mate is sooooooooooooooo showbiz and a self confessed old queen he's as good a gay as you can hope for)..... but the rest , of course, are ladies!

Like Many gay men I was surrounded by women when I was growing up ( oh I know I am generalising here- so don't write in)....My mother was a bit of a drama queen in the style of Joan Crawford in Mildred Pierce whereas my maternal grandmother played a cross between Jane Darwell in The Grapes Of Wrath and actress Elizabeth Spriggs ( google her). Of course my twin sister and Elder Sister were always around like the cast of Little Women ( I would have been the irritating Amy..though I always saw myself as the virtuous Beth) and in the wings there was also a selection of strong aunts, family friends an a diminuative paternal grandmother to back up the oestrogen levels

Here, on the blog I am surrounded by fellow like minded bloggers , the majority being women, and its lovely.

Of course, as in my real friendships ( and I mean that nicely) I have a few guy friends here that are well and truly connected to their sensitive sides, and I sure that they wont mind me saying this, but the majority of buddies are non nonsense "garls!" with the odd wise cracking gay thrown in........just the way I like it!

Who Was Auntie Glad

Yesterday I was asked by a new reader who auntie Glad was?

They had seen my reference to her in my blog bio ( see right)

I will share this piece with them, I think it will do nicely…..

This is the story of my very first meeting with Auntie Gladys.

She was in her mid eighties back then and was selling her Flower Show raffle tickets around the village and its surrounds.

She would sell four to five hundred in consecutive afternoons

This was back in 2006
The Jungle telegraph had alerted to most that there was a new Gay couple in the village

I bought a strip off her

She was tiny. White hair, a bit windswept, thin hands, a red woollen coat worn for many years with matching red lipstick

And I noticed even back then that she had watery, gentle blue eyes, that were full of interest and candor

" Does your friend want any tickets too?" she asked , her eyes twinkling and I was half amused by the term "friend" a word which was often bandied around by people too shy or too uncomfortable to call a spade a spade
Only Gladys was not uncomfortable, she was just searching for the right word to use
"He is my partner and not a friend and yes he will have some tickets from you" I told her kindly
Gladys laughed
"I was going to call him your boyfriend " she said "but you are both far too old to be called that!!!"

At 96, on the day of our marriage, the old girl walked all the way down from her house on High Street to present me with a wedding gift over the kitchen wall and when I remarked that I never thought I would see the day that two men would be allowed to Marry each other
she clapped her frail hands together and laughed her musical Welsh laugh and with her blue eyes twinkling she then held her hands to her chin

"How marvellous" she cried…It is the law!”

yes....how bloody marvellous!

Gladys opening the Flower Show

2016

Gracie

Trendy Carol ( dressed in something autumnal and classy ) sent me this video of her Gracie playing with Roger and old Mary

Love it

On the way out to meet Chic Eleanor for lunch x

The Mean Reds?

The weather has turned somewhat

It feels cold, suddenly damp and all rather sad

And Grey

Holly Golightly would refer to these kind of times as

“ The Blues….a time when

you're getting fatter and maybe it's been raining too long”

The soaring violins after the line

Two drifters

Always brings me around on days like today

And I am reminded of Buddy Edsen’s sad face looking up out of the bus window,

Of Audrey Hepburn’s wonderful beauty

And of waltzing in the dining room on a winter’s afternoon in Sheffield

Pause For Thought

Many people grow up in difficult households. Those people often learn to read a room quickly, mainly because they have too. Because they have limited support, they learn to be as self sufficient as they can. They don’t ask for help, because help is not forthcoming . It’s simply not there.

They do not trust easily. They can’t , so they soldier on often unseen and isolated. These are the children of a hidden abuse. They mask their hollow smiles, they can be loud and funny and therefore remain unseen. They are not victims because they’ve never acted as one, nor been treated as one.

They fall through the cracks.

This fact, alone makes this video so important

Herd Mentality

I’m enjoying Celebrity Traitors but non but the murdered Bella Ramsey ( and perhaps the desperate Hannah Fry) have understood the phenomenon of herd mentality. The rest , over a dozen fairly bright celebs, are getting swayed by names thrown up as if everyone is an extra at the Salam witch Trials .

The one thing I’m proud of myself for, is that I’m not swayed by the mob.

I realised this early on , in life.

I don’t bounce along with an hysterical concert audience

I don’t scream chants at football games ( yes I HAVE been to one)

And I don’t panic in a crisis.

And most importantly I understand the importance of standing back and reading the room

Miranda Hart is my bet to be the saviour of the faithfuls

Animal Review

Weaver is a vampire

Bun has been gone for over two months now.

She’s not coming back.

😔

Weaver only comes alive and friendly as darkness and silence takes over the cottage .

Only then does she playfully sits on my hip, or my catheter leg bag ( which is warm) or comes for a brief cuddle , eventually coming to rest in the arch of one of my feet.

Daytime she sleeps upstairs, usually in a pile of untidy clothes , or on the orange cushion in the window seat of my bedroom.

No living animal ever sees her in the daylight.

Mary continues to fade, rather like Lilian Gish did in Robert Altman’s The Wedding. She’s eating well, but does little more, but I was touched when she jumped up at the sky lesbian technician the other day, demanding a cuddle and marvellously getting one.

Tonight she is asleep in my knee, coughing gently with pulmonary oedema.

Roger remains the joy of my household

He’s the new star of my daily gay man’s stream, with multi cultural screams of ooooooohhhhh and arrrhhhh from gay bears from around the world

As I type this , he’s stalking a rather large household spider which has entered the kitchen through the broken cat flap , but is too frightened to actually pounce.

He keeps my morale up with his gentle good humour

Roger and his favourite plant pot

Take Heart

I’m thinking of Yael today, and of Lee too.

And stream follower Zachary in Tel Aviv got a message from me too as did Yael

Lee received a kiss , sent heavenward from the garden

I do so miss her

We all know it’s the anniversary of the 711 attacks

And most of us here want a lasting peace.

Today I streamed on a gay streaming site.

Zachary joined in. He’s a bright IT businessman in his thirties with sharp witty asides to many a topic

The room had several gay men I know in it,; a polish actor, a doctor from the East Indies , an Englishman on chemo, a Spanish physio, and one of the last entrants was a Younger Palestinian student , who was living in Germany

I was moved by one brief interaction between him and Zachary as the Arab said hello to the group, he typed a diplomatic and kind “ Shalom” to all”,

There was a brief gap in the correspondence

After which the Israeli replied with an equally moving “ As salamu Alaykum” 🌈

It’s Tuesday already

All of my counselling clients finished their sessions last week, so I thought I’d take 2 weeks off from a full day’s concentration. I worked last night at the hospice and won’t return until Saturday night

Tonight it’s relaxing in front of a coal fire with The Great British Bake Off.

Little else to report. An old friend died over the weekend, which seems to be a sad and increasing trend in this life of a middle sixty year old someone….I was sad and reflective on Sunday….overly so with the gloom only lifted by a gift of dahlias from next door

Gina, the powerhouse who helped so hard in last year’s Christmas Show has been poorly too. I sent her some flowers on behalf of the TCA. I always use Bloom And Wild now because they deliver their flowers in a slim box through the letterbox. For some strange reason this always pleases me.

I’ve bought tickets to see Ignacio Lopez at theatre Clwyd , he’ll cheer me up , we all need a handsome Spaniard in our lives don’t we?

Ojalá tuviera un español guapo en mi vida.

The Trelawnyd Community Association Benefit Concert

I was sat in the crowd for the first half so couldn’t film the mostly Welsh pieces, which were wonderful

This piece is a famous Welsh Lullaby, I will post more pieces tomorrow but I will share with you these magnificent pieces. A lovely night and all Money to save our hall.