Reflections



 I’ve gotten out of the habit of looking at myself in the mirror.
Has anyone else got out of this daily routine? 
Perhaps I don’t want to see my grey beard, and my shiny grey hair my dad possessed before he died . 
Perhaps I don’t want to see how tired I look after a day shift.
Perhaps I don’t like looking at myself at all.
I went to Supervision today , it’s been a miserably wet , grey day, and supervision gave me something to think of at the beach in Bluebell
So I’ve come home and had the longest of hot showers,  a kick ass shave and lots of face moisturiser , and made ramen noodles with prawns for supper which I ate in front of the fire , watched by four pairs of eyes 

82 comments:

  1. Anonymous8:58 pm

    I don’t look at myself in the mirror either, only when I wash my face and comb my hair.. My late husband used to say that I was the least vain person on earth. He said that I was always clean and neat. He liked that I was always ready to go. I had a long hot shower today mainly to get warm, the weather has gone from summer to fall this last week. I just had a nap cuddled under two duvets with my dog. I don’t know how i will survive a cold winter.. i struggle to figure out what to cook for myself and being on antibiotics has killed my appetite. Your meals always sound so good. Oh well I have lost 10 pounds in the last couple of weeks which I needed. I hope you are home with the crew tonight. Gigi

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    1. I was indeed. The kittens have suddenly become very cuddly with me, I knew they would be , so I left it in their corner

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  2. Anonymous9:13 pm

    Your meals always sound so inviting....and eating such a lovely supper with 4 pairs of eyes watching must be as comforting as the food! I try NOT to look at myself if at all possible...as Gigi mentioned...only when I wash my face and comb my hair (what is left of it). I recall my Mother, as she aged....telling me *I try not to look in the mirror because I end up thinking.......who IS this person? She doesn't LOOK like the person I feel like on the inside*. I think of those words often
    Susan M/Calif

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    1. Yes I am still that man of 28 looking back at me, but it’s occasionally a shock when you realise that you are 62

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  3. The real trick is not to put your glasses on before looking in the mirror!

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  4. i'm the same age as you and i don't like looking at myself, sometimes i feel like my face needs ironing! xx

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  5. Yorkshire Liz9:33 pm

    No it's not just you! Age means I don't look like a person I recognise any more. But I'm ok with that, as never much to look at in the first place! Life's like that. And I prefer wrinkles and laughter lines to a blank face and expressionless face. Like Melanie Trump, for example!

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    1. She has help me tattooed on her eyelids

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  6. We have two bathroom cabinets side by side, my husband fitted them. I'm so short that all I can see are my eyebrows and forehead. Fortunately I'm not vain either.

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  7. Anonymous10:07 pm

    I completely understand that. During Covid I stopped dying my hair and was shocked to discover it is white not gray. However, comments and suggestions as well as “looks” have not been kind. - Jackie

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    1. It sounds beautiful.

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    2. Anonymous12:42 am

      Thanks Lizzy D. Jackie

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    3. Jo in Auckland1:54 am

      I think white hair is beautiful!

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    4. Remember Jonney morris?

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  8. Yes, so much that when I see a photo of myself it is a shock...and it is usually me behind the camera taking pictures of others as well.

    But the eyes have it as the head of foundation said when I met her nearly thirty years later...

    It is too easy not to look after oneself...

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    1. I agree….nd I’m trying hard to remedy that

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  9. I also do not look at the mirror much but never did. Somehow i lost all the blogs I follow in yet another move. YEA ! I found yours first.

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  10. I still look in the mirror. I think I’m hoping to be surprised.

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    1. You still have your looks xxx

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    2. I always wanted somebody else’s!

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    3. That is such a good retort. An idea for a future post...who do you want to look like and who looks like who you would want to be with.

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  11. I only look in mirror to cut my hair and to make sure [rare new] clothes fit. I loved my mom and miss her dearly, but I don't like seeing her face instead of ''mine'' in the mirror. Inside we are all 17 or 25, maybe 30, but not more. Her eyes look so sad and worried, hiding pain and loneliness
    ............
    It's not how you look , what matters is the man you are in your heart, John. Good, kind, empathetic, emotionally smart, etc. That said, since you'll need to connect w new clients, who may judge n those first 10 seconds of meeting, you can maybe? step up the grooming, buy some nice glasses, get a good haircut etc. Consider it an investment?

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    1. I see my dad and my mom
      My dad was handsome
      In old age my mother wasn’t

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  12. I usually try to look my best so yes, I look in the mirror. Even just to go food shopping I want to present myself as well as possible. Lunch out with friends means hair and full makeup. If I feel.good about myself I am more personable to others. I admit I am way overweight but that is a totally different issue.

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  13. I am careful about how I present myself - a family trait. My mother would have forty fits if I went downstairs without being fully clothed and made up, and I still hold to that. I was aware as an older teacher that it was important to look like I wasn't "late 60s". During Covid lockdowns I decided the time had come to stop dyeing my hair. Wow! People really do treat you differently if you "look OLD". Young teachers would comment, when I'd given a suggestion (always, always when asked for!) "How did you know that?" and I had to resist replying that I'd been teaching since they were toddlers! Easier with coloured hair!

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    1. I would expect nothing less from you my dear x

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  14. Barbara Anne11:38 pm

    I look at myself when I wash my face at bedtime, or brush my teeth twice a day but have worn no make-up in two decades, except for occasional lip stick.
    Be kind to yourself, John, your smile is wonderful and your eyes - and actions - are oh, so kind. That matters most. Your family, friends, neighbors, and lots of us all over the planet love you because you're lovable.

    Hugs!

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  15. I've never given much thought to looking at myself in the mirror. It appears with some evaluation, "yes," I do look directly in the mirror when grooming and when fully dressed to make sure everything is to my liking.
    You are a kind, generous, smart, lovely man, starting an exciting new career...you must try my mirror habits.
    P.S., "I'm wearing a baseball hat at 59" photo is winning."

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  16. "Mirror mirror on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?"
    Not me - that's for sure. I need radical cosmetic surgery.

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    1. At least you don’t look like bagpuss

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  17. I think all my mirrors have cracked from the fright of me. ; )

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  18. I had Bells Palsy when I was 21 and my face has been crooked since, so not a fan of mirrors or photos. Added to that, I've started to look a lot more like my mother, both my face and my naked body. Yikes.
    Hope you had a good sleep.

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    1. I did pixie, the kittens cuddled up too which was sweet

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  19. I haven't got out of the habit--I DO have to go out in public--but I increasingly recoil from that old dude looking back at me.

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    1. This post has touched a nerve love it

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  20. When I am with people I
    care about I focus on how
    they are feeling, not on
    how they look.You are easy to care about, others
    likely are just glad to see you.Enjoy your family of animals and have a good night -Mary

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  21. Anonymous2:41 am

    My Mom used to say she looked in the mirror and wondered who that old lady was! Now I get it! Kathy

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  22. This post has struck a nerve. I am very self conscious. I always have been. I am very backward about pictures. I hate to have my picture taken. But I've been thinking about it, and you know what? I will not be here for always. I want my grandchildren to have something to remember me by. Tim and I had photos taken at the end of summer, and we will give one to each of our kids, framed, for Christmas. I haven't looked at them. I know that I won't like them. I keep telling myself that it really doesn't matter. And it doesn't.

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    1. But how you feel does matter , how we all feel today DOES matter

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  23. I never look at myself in the mirror, other than to trim my bead once every few weeks. My wife has to tell me if I have a black smudge on my cheek.

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  24. As others have said, I only look at myself occasionally. It still comes as a shock to me that it's not me in the mirror, but my Mum! I haven't worn make-up for years, have cut my own hair for over 40 years, and, without my glasses, everything's a blur anyway! As long as I'm clean and reasonably tidy, I don't care what I look like. If others do, that's their problem. xx

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  25. I look in the mirror almost daily to sort hair and a little make up. Also to check I am tidy before I go out. But I am not so happy with what I see as when I was younger. I try to be kind to myself though and accept changes while trying to stay healthy and make what effort I can. Mirrors can be harsh, as can introspection be for me.

    Your meal sounds tasty!


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  26. Lynn Marie10:44 am

    I don't look in the mirror very often. It's just not that interesting any more, but this reminds me of when I was a teenager and it was endlessly fascinating to gaze at myself. I think it's because I know who I am now and don't need a reflection to reassure me that I'm here.

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  27. I find myself in the supermarket before I realise that I haven't looked in the mirror since first thing in the morning. Then I try and check myself in the mirror on the 'reading glasses' revolving stand, just to check that I'm reasonable and not wearing any of my breakfast around my mouth. It's obviously an 'age thing'.

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  28. I avoid the mirror - I am 81 and this is not how I envisioned ending up!

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  29. Anonymous11:56 am

    I'm sorry to disagree with everybody but one should never give up on being aware of how we present ourselves to the wider world. It's not about ageing - I've embraced the fact that I'll never be 23 again and actually enjoy the signs of growing and maturing. For me it's all about self respect. If I don't care about myself, why should anybody else care? Bel Ami

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    1. I agree, see my comment in the post below this one

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  30. Wow, John, I read through every comment, and I am not sure how I feel now! On one side, I feel normal, since I seem to feel like most who commented that they aren't super fond of the mirror, or of having their picture taken. And then the other side is, DAMMIT, does the whole world place our worth and value on what we look like? If I think deeply about it, it is the goal of capitalism that drives us to buy things (hair color, clothes, plastic surgery) to make us look and live a certain way, and only then, can we be truly happy. The answer for me lies in how will I be remembered by those whom I loved? Tiny and fit? Well-dressed? Perfect make-up? FUCK no. I will be remembered by how well I loved others. You, John, are intentional with how well you love others, both 2 legs and 4, and others love you dearly for that.

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    1. I think there is a difference between looking your best and not caring what you look like because we are judged on character. IMO its a sign of respect to look my best if I go to a friends house vs not washing my hair,dressed sloppily etc. Yes,the insides of me are still the same but not caring if I look like a slob is disrespect my host. By the sake token,if I have someone over I go out of my way to make everything very nice to show them I care

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    2. I don't think we are disrespecting the supermarket if we turn up looking slightly dishevelled!! Even me and John check our appearance when we visit friends or invite them round to ours. I think you are taking this slightly too seriously.

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  31. Keeping my hair a little shorter, I really don't look in the mirror much. As an experiment this year, I am posting a selfie a day, and stop to look at those from time to time. https://travelpenguindaily.blogspot.com/

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  32. Anonymous12:39 pm

    That must have been a reflective supervision meeting. Your post reminded me of when I did seek out mirrors. I was going through a rough personal time, and seeking out a mirror and looking at myself was a reinforcement of the fact that hey I was there a presence, a person. I think your post is of something different though, a reminder to care for yourself not just in the how I look way, but in the self love way, of making a meal to savor and giving your body some care, not forgetting about yourself. Jean in Winnipeg

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    1. Very astute Jean
      It’s seeing someone of value that deserves and needs self care

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  33. Looking in the mirror doesn't bother me. I look the way I look and that's how a 74-year-old woman looks. I've never been glamorous and so I've gotten used to looking like I look. Laughter, kindness, sharing, thoughtfulness, tolerance are so much more important than a person's outside shell.
    John, I like you just the way you are (to quote Mr. Rogers)!

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  34. I suppose I look at myself in the mirror whenever I'm in the bathroom, but it's not really a conscious effort on my part. It's just there.

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  35. I almost never look in a mirror.

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  36. Hi John Not commented for a while as hubby ill. Just had a cataract replaced waiting for second op next month. I read all I could about cataract operations but one thing they left out. I can now see all my wrinkles so clearly. I've got over grey hair but all these bloody wrinkles. I knew I had a few but they have taken over my face. So keep away from mirrors. I am sure you still look like Alan Rickman to me. Also, love the four pair of eyes. Those little kits have got their black paws safely under the table I guess. Love Andi xxx

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    1. I hope he is recovering
      As for mr Rickman, I look like his mother lol

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  37. I have perfected the art of shaving without looking in the mirror.

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  38. After Covid almost took me out a few years ago, I thank my body every day for getting me through. I am just happy to be alive.
    No one, to me, is more appealing than someone who can make me laugh. And though this might be TMI, I'll say it anyway. You have that teddy bear quality about you that is just so lovable. That will never age.

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  39. Anonymous10:50 pm

    This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  40. Anonymous11:47 pm

    I’m ok in the mirror without specs it’s on Facechat it’s an ugly wrinkled face grey haired old hag . Men with grey well trimmed whiskers are quite handsome indeed attractive even for an old lesbian.. my old mate has the best shaped beard, but then he is Italian and vain which I love

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    1. I love the Italian vibe….i look like a fat opera singer xx

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  41. Anonymous1:35 am

    I look in the mirror when cleaning my teeth or brushing my hair. Mostly perfunctory glimpses. I have one mirror in the bathroom placed above the sink that makes me look younger. An old mirror adorning the front of the corner medicine chest shows a truer reflection.

    My cats love me as I am and so does Himself. We comment to one another how we've aged, but we are happy and healthy for the most part.

    I'm typing from my phone, and can't get my blog ID to show for some weird reason.

    Megan from Megan blogs

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  42. I too have noticed that I don't look in the mirror much anymore. And when I do I don't recognize the guy staring back so maybe that's why.

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