I’d booked for a four hour,”Cooking experience” this morning which turned out to be somewhat of a disaster. It was advertised in Llandudno at what I thought was a hotel but turned out to be a small private house in Craig Y Don, and the hostess seemed surprised I had turned up even though I had talked to her partner at length via email and messenger,
I walked into the dining room to see four unsmiling faces already preparing vegetables to centre sushi or pancakes, and the head of the group, a woman in her twenties reminded the host that she had booked a private session for just her and her friends and non said hello in response to my wave and smile.
The host apologised, when I showed her my booking acceptance on line, but shrugged her shoulders and said she wasn’t expecting me.
The client talked as though I was invisible and told the host that she “ felt very uncomfortable that a MAN was potentially, going to join her group .
“I am standing in front of you” I reminded her, but the atmosphere was too toxic for me to feel that the teaching could have been in any way acceptable , especially as the four women whispered away amongst themselves.
I walked out,
Suddenly aware of my sex, just a tad angry and a tiny bit tearful
WHAT Is wrong with some people ! Why could not at least one of them spoken out and laughed about the mix up - Awful behaviour - I hope no one was paid - and I do hope their sushi is rank x 💩
ReplyDeleteThe whole think knocked my confidence and spoilt the day until I went to a barbacue at my sisters house
DeleteSo sorry it made you feel bad. Please dont...it wasn't you, it was them.
DeleteI can't believe this... a MAN
DeleteGod help us all.
Not a great business model is it?
ReplyDeleteI, too, hope it wasn't paid for in advance.
No it wasn’t , I got the feeling it was a new “ enterprise”
DeleteI also hope there is some kind of feedback option (as with the Airbnbs, rideshares, etc.).
ReplyDeleteThe Facebook page on which it was advertised has been deleted
DeletePoor you. Glad you walked out and hope no fee had been paid. Thinking of you dear one as you coax Weaver out from her hiding place and attempt to acclimatise her to those two Welshies. Hopefully she will soon realse that you are a complete soft touch and that her wish is your command.
ReplyDeleteUsually I am very assertive in such situations , but I felt belittled and embarrassed pat .
DeleteNot nice
Oh John please don't feel that way. Don't give them that power.
DeleteWhat bad mannered young women doing a pretty good imitation of Victorian virgins having an attack of the vapours. I hope their sushi was rancid and they all got food poisoning.
ReplyDeleteWhat disgraceful behaviour from (alleged) grown adults. And what a way to conduct a business. I hope there is a way for you to vent your displeasure a such social ineptness and professional incompetence; and warn others at the same time. And I hope that a refund is forthcoming. Such behaviour in this day and age makes me splutter. I would love to be sharing you with a cookery session, so there. They clearly do not know what they are missing. Their loss. NOT yours! (Apart from wasting your time, that is!) Head up proudly, Mr Gray!
I had not paid ( something that was originally requested online ) I spoke to the woman’s partner who obviously hadn’t passed on the booking
DeleteThe business owner should have made this work. She somehow screwed things up with the class registrations. The customer speaking seems rude and even a bit toxic. You might not have wanted to spend time in her company. Lately, I have no tolerance for toxic behavior.
ReplyDeleteI wasn’t dressed well, but I was dressed for a potentially hot kitchen , they way the woman looked me up and down made me feel totally embarrassed, I hate that feeling
DeleteHow rude.
ReplyDeleteYes
DeleteWhat disgusting behaviour from all those women. Not one of them with any manners! Makes me ashamed of my sex. I'm sure you make better sushi than any of them, considering it is a mindful experience, and they obviously don't do mindfullness! xx
ReplyDeleteThey obviously had an expectation in their head which I was not a part of
DeleteWhat on earth did she think a MAN was going to get up to in a sushi workshop? Just mean all round.
ReplyDeleteIt all could have been handled better
DeleteHoney, it's not you, it's them.
ReplyDeleteBunch of twats
DeleteLee
Amen. Totally uncalled for. John, I'd be thrilled to be in a class with you anytime.
DeleteOh dear, wouldn't want their karma, huh? Especially if one was planning to eat raw fish....
ReplyDeleteCeci
Terrible behavior by the young women and the host/hostess. Hope you found peace after leaving, and joy when you arrived home to Weaver & Beans, Roger & Mary.
ReplyDeleteWhat a terrible experience. Handled so poorly. They could 1-have welcomed you warmly, how fun that could have been! Or two- apologized profusely, offered a refund or reschedule. There was no reason to make you leave in tears. I'm so upset on your behalf. If they have a website or FB etc I d leave a detailed poor review.
ReplyDeleteFacebook details have been removed tonight
DeleteRemoved by them or by you? Do you have a system like Yelp to rate services etc?
DeleteOh my goodness! A man wanted to join the class? What a bunch of pearl clutchers. John, you should have used your "cheap shoes" comeback on these idiots. It looks like you saved yourself from some indigestion.
ReplyDeleteThat must have been a rotten experience, John. I hope you've managed to shake it off now. Xx
ReplyDeleteBeyond rude! Boorish, disgusting and uncalled for too. Bad karma for them.
ReplyDeleteShe felt uncomfortable that a man was going to join her cooking class?! I understand that people have their private traumas and whatnot, but I don't see how cooking next to a man (especially a gay man, though of course she wouldn't know that) could be a triggering experience.
ReplyDeleteUpon further reflection, the host should have found some better way to handle this. I think the real onus is on her.
Delete(Oh -- my first comment vanished. I must be in spam.)
DeleteI have observed some very rude behavior lately and they were all young women. Not sure what is going on. Do you have a way to leave a public review? Jackie
ReplyDeleteI’ve read your blog for years but never commented. This time I will.. I’m sorry your feelings were hurt - there is no excuse for that kind of behavior from those women. When ever there is a group learning to do something they all enjoy it should be a great experience for all who attend. The instructor did not handle this well at all. I hope there is a means of giving a much deserved bad review.
ReplyDeleteWelcome
DeleteAnd your comment “ your feelings were hurt” hit home
My feelings were hurt and I hate that
I only have two words John “spiteful cows”. Chin up it is them not you. Jan in Castle Gresley
ReplyDeleteWe had 3 men at our yoga class getting into all sorts of positions - I don't know what those misery guts women would have thought of that - Also I heard of one man who didn't wear any underpants beneath his shorts during a class - Ev ery Thing was on show apparently x
ReplyDeleteWhat? Mens genitals falling out of their shorts? Everything was on show? How on earth is this relevant to John's post?
DeleteTotally out of order. Can't believe the way people can act towards others. Certainly would see if I could leave a review and an email of complaint. Definately their issue not yours.
ReplyDeleteWTF?! Leave the host an honest bad review online if that’s an option
ReplyDeleteAs others have said, it's not you, it's them. You really have to internalize that, or it will continue to feel like it has something to do with you. It's not you. Period. I'm sorry you didn't get your anticipated cooking session, though. It's deflating to look forward to something and have it fall through due to organizer inadequacy.
ReplyDeleteIf there's anyway of leaving a review, leave one. That is a disgusting way to treat someone that was totally in the right.
ReplyDeleteIt's really hard to believe that people can be so unfeeling toward others, yet I see it often. That must have felt so hurtful and I'm sorry you had to experience it. Common decency isn't so common.
ReplyDeleteTheir loss John. I can't believe that a group of women would not immediately accept you in whatever circumstances and, on behalf of my gender, I apologize for their ignorance.
ReplyDeleteWell that’s shit, John. Host obviously embarrassed because she’d cocked up - other party annoyed because they thought they were having a ‘private’ event. What a shame they didn’t take the chance of including you, because I think you would be great fun at an event like that. I hope you get your money back. Things like that can really knock your confidence, I know. It’s like when you’re having a bad day and then the bus driver shouts at you. I hope that playing with Weaver and Beans (are they coming out now?) has restored some equilibrium, this will all seem trivial in a few days.
ReplyDeleteCheap shoes.
ReplyDeleteI was too surprised to resort
DeleteI'm so sorry to hear this, it sounded like a class that promised to be a fun morning. May their sushi be as tasteless as they are.
ReplyDeleteBonnie in Minneapolis
No excuse for being rude. Rude is rude.
ReplyDeleteThat's appalling! What a disgusting way to treat a fellow paying pupil. This is down to the instructor but the young women could do with a lesson in inclusive behaviour... if the boot was on the other foot there would have been mayhem! Sorry it was a nasty experience for you; making someone who was completely in the right feel unwelcome and put down is gut wrenching. I hope you mark it up to a bad start to the day, leave a -1 review on the feedback form and move on .... to playing with your beautiful kittens... wonder what Mary and Roger think of the ambience in the cottage now they have interlopers.
ReplyDeleteUnfathomably rude behavior on the part of the host, no excuse for that. Just wrong.
ReplyDeleteI am absolutely stunned at the lack of decorum on the part of everyone (save for you, of course), but especially the host of this event. I am just floored by their behavior and sadly, they likely also had NO awareness of the hurtfulness it caused. Very sad
ReplyDeleteSusan M
I walked away feeling shamed and I’d originally booked the morning to boost my mood
DeleteHey ho
The best part of all that was your walking out, I am sorry that happened to you -Mary
ReplyDeleteWell, if her sushi was anything like her manners, you haven't missed anything. I'm so sorry this happened to you.
ReplyDeleteI hope you get a full refund and an apology. Fucking cows.
ReplyDeleteAlso I am glad you glad you didn't pay for that class-Mary
ReplyDeleteHow absolutely incredibly awful. It’s mind boggling that the host chose not to step in with kindness and tact and resolve the situation. Very, very hurtful. All I can say is their loss John. I would have been delighted if you had walked through the door and I knew I was going to hang out and make sushi with you. Jean in Winnipeg
ReplyDeleteThose women sound like wackos. Don’t let their petty rude attitudes ruin your weekend. Personally I’d be glad to see you if I took a cooking or creative class.
ReplyDeleteSorry - I'm down as Anonymous but my name is Ruth.
ReplyDeleteI came on hoping to see pictures of the kittens meeting Roger and Mary. I wish more people were like Roger. (Ruth again).
ReplyDeleteTomorrow Ruth, I’ve won the twins over
DeleteI've just seen the update on the kittens. They look like they can hold their own around two dogs :). Very cute. (from Ruth)
DeleteI just want to give you a hug
ReplyDeleteWell, it's their loss, John. You would have been a fun person to learn sushi with! Good thing you walked out. Don't let it get you down. Hopefully, you can look back at laugh at how silly they behaved. Weirdos!
ReplyDeleteHoly Shit! Disaster is right! I guess we don't know her backstory; perhaps she was brutalized by a man, but still...to act as if you weren't even there. If its possible, you should write an online review about how unorganized it was. I hope you got a refund. I wouldn't accept a rain date if offered.
ReplyDeleteReplying again after reading all of the replies. This post really really made me sad. What a bunch of snobby CUNTS. There! I said it! Something I have never said before about another woman. I am just so sorry that you felt belittled. Nobody should be made to feel that way. Many of us posters would pay good money to have a fun time with you. XOXO
ReplyDeleteI had exactly the same thing happen re a booking taken by the husband and then not passed on to the wife. it got very nasty. Anyway, the bad behaviour was absolutely nothing to do with you personally. Find yourself something even nicer to do. I don't like to think in terms of revenge but living well is the best revenge or perhaps we could say antidote.
ReplyDeleteOutrageous! Those women should be ashamed of their horrid behavior and arrogance. You're the better for leaving and if there was a fee charged, it should be returned to you with abject apologies.
ReplyDeleteHugs!
If that's the way they are starting a business, I think it will be a doomed failure. Jen
ReplyDeleteI hope you slammed the door.
ReplyDeleteNasty people without empathy in a nasty situation. Such things can be soul destroying. I am glad to read you had a family catch up later in the day.
ReplyDeleteWow, what a bunch of assholes. There's no excuse for being so mean. Small people with small hearts and no manners.
ReplyDeleteUnprofessional and unkind. Uncalled for. Glad you left…. Kathy
ReplyDeleteI would say what my grandma always said, "women can be such cats with their claws straight to the heart", but knowing your lovely affinity for them, I won't.
ReplyDeleteShame on them. Poor you.
ReplyDeleteThat was disgraceful. I hope you sent a nasty letter!!!
ReplyDeleteWhat a complete mess up by the organisers, but what inexcusable selfishness and nastiness by the group of women. No manners or simple human kindness. You were right to leave as it really was "toxic".
ReplyDeleteI would have wanted to drop through the floor. None of those women had an ounce of class. I hope they eventually regret their behavior.
ReplyDeleteImagine the exchange between the woman and her husband when he got home. That’s an image that makes me giggle a bit in a snarky way.
weavinfool
Terrible behaviour..they could at least have gracefully said sorry there had been a booking mixup and offered an alternative arrangement
ReplyDeleteI am sorry you had to experience that John.. how horrible for you .. sending a hug xxx Libs xx
ReplyDeleteI have been heartened and much amused by all the comments here, as we have all been singing from the same hymn sheet to support, encourage and huff aloud in sympathy. Which I hope has helped and encouraged you today. Here is the answer: you do a cookery class of your own at the cottage - because some of your productions look both gorgeous and delicious, and I often think 'include the recipe, John!' -and see how many of us turn up. Now, there's a thought. Ice creams and tutti fruittis all round!
ReplyDeleteI'm in, even if just for the chatting and laughs! xx
DeleteYes you could do that definitely John - I knew a French lady who had a lovely cottage -We went to a "dinner party " there ( an odd experience by the way - only 4 ) - She said she taught business men how to cook there - The food she served us was not nice - Yours would be delicious I'm certain - She also did feet ! - Gone now to live in a chateaux in France x
DeleteSorry you internalized this. It’s all about them, not you. The host should be apologizing profusely for her error and putting you in such an awful position. The group in the class were hideous and should have taken out their frustration on the host, not on you. What awful people.
ReplyDeleteI feel lightened by the comments , but the whole situation seemed designed to prick my vulnerabilities being made to feel a fool of is my Achilles heel.
DeleteIt literally made me feel worthless
I'm so sad you felt that way John. Kath x
DeleteNever mind. I was going to say, "sushi is shit anyway" but instead I will say that sushi is overrated in my opinion. Regarding the blatant sexism you experienced, libertarians rarely admit that men can also be on the receiving end of it.
ReplyDeleteSo rude. Firstly I am sorry that you had this truly awful experience. Secondly, the fault lies with the host and the tutor. Both behaved appallingly and as for the students, well it's not the 1840s,behave like adults. It really isn't you John, it's them.
ReplyDeleteThat was absolutely horrible, and I'm so sorry it happened to you. You are so very far from worthless and I'm sure many of us here would pay good money just to hang out with you. (Hmm, maybe that came out wrong...) But you're a life-enhancing person and deserve to be valued as such. Jan xx
ReplyDeleteWhat nasty, rude people, both the host and the students. I bet their shoes were all cheap and ugly and I hope they hurt their feet to boot!
ReplyDelete'Host' is too good a word for somebody running a business in such a rude, friendly and unprofessional manner. Absolutely appalling. I hope that Host and students read your blog and/or that a review is left for the way they treated you. Unbelievable. Rise above it and twing those bra straps!
ReplyDeleteApologies - late to this.......unbelievable and totally unacceptable behaviour on their part!
ReplyDeleteAlison in Wales x
I would have done, what you did. Always take care of yourself.
ReplyDeleteHow bizarre and unpleasant. Good thing you didn’t have to fight for a refund. Down the line, I hope you find a class taught by a professional.
ReplyDeleteJean in Oregon
Let us hope that 3 of the whispering women were trying to convince their rude friend to be friendly. And wish that the whole group of them spends time thinking about how unkindly they treated you. Shameful behaviors on their part. Glad you had a gathering of family to cheer you up.
ReplyDeleteIt seems the fault was with the host by double booking, not the group of women.
ReplyDeleteThey'd booked a female only cooking session and they had every right to object to a man beng there. You have no idea why they wanted females only and you're making a "poor me" reaction to it, instead of accepting it for what it was. A ladies only group which you had no right to attend. The issue is with the person who took your booking, not the women.
" Ladies only " - it was not a lavatory x 🚽😂
DeleteIf you read my post, you would see I didn’t blame anyone
DeleteAnon
DeleteI am with John here.
It was a fucking sushi class not a rape survivors group for gods sake
Yes john does come over like an incel but no need for discrimated against
Ha Ha Flis! So true!
DeleteThe Facebook post was still accessible until yesterday evening. The class could be booked for Hen Parties so it's very likely that's what happened..Would I want a male attending my Hen Party? No.
DeleteThe conclusion I make in my humble opinion is - and a fair one may I add - It was a bloody shambles - A right royal cock up in fact 🐓
DeleteIt was merely a misbooked cooking session flis
DeleteThe women still had bad manners. Would "I feel uncomfortable with a black person or a fat person or an American" ha e been acceptable? No, and neither is saying a man makes.her uncomfortable right in front of John. They could have privately taken the host to another room and explained their feelings. The host was at fault as well.
ReplyDeleteYou weren't invited to the all girls party John, it wasn't their fault you turned up. Why put the post out in such a dramatic way inviting your readers to slag off the females. It's not their fault if you're uncomfortable and tearful about your sex.
ReplyDeleteJohn was invited the moment they accepted his booking. You’re letting your nasty character cloud your logic.
Delete