In the early 1980s my friendship group dispersed to Universities and hospitals around the country.
We’ve all done ok for ourselves, with the sad exception of Ian Parry who became a renown freelance photographer based in Tooting, but who sadly died in a Russian Cargo plane leaving Bucharest in December 1989 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ian_Parry
Before our natural parting of the ways, and as avid CB enthusiasts, we spent much time at the more liberal houses of the group’s parents, drinking tea by the gallon, and hanging out in untidy lumps as adolescents do. It was the funeral, of one of those parents today. May ( Mother of Janet ( whose CB handle I have forgotten ) and Diane, who was known as Cherry Blossom.
May’s door was always open to teenagers and I was nice to be there today, to acknowledge the fact and to support old friends both of whom , I haven’t seen for 35 years.
I had forgotten that years ago I had given May a small figurine of Lorne Green as she was obsessed with the man after seeing him in Bonanza as a girl. It was with her in the coffin,I was told in a whisper, when I joined the meet and greet line.
I liked the fact that the Bonanza theme tune was played as everyone got up to leave the service hall, even though I had the urge to gallop to the music like Miranda Hart did on her tv programme .
I walked out with Helen a charming, horsey public school girl of my former group who had blossomed into a gentle fifty something Priest who has recently returned to wales.
We smiled together as The Bonanza music filled the hall and the curtains closed silently.
I was surprised to read that Bonanza was popular even where you lived, John. How nice that you were able to go to May's service to honor her. I bet it was great to see old friends and share happy memories.
ReplyDeleteI do find that small talk incredibly difficult , but I’m not the only one
DeleteWhat a wonderful story about Bonanza and your statuette gift.
ReplyDeleteIt was new to me today I had totally forgotten
DeleteSo very dear. I'm glad you went.
ReplyDeleteSo am i
DeleteMay your many memories of friendship and love carry on. RIP May
ReplyDeleteFunny how people flit into your lives then out again, it was nice to acknowledge those few years we were friends
Deletebonanza = something that is very valuable, profitable, or rewarding.
ReplyDeleteAt times, life itself might be seen as a bonanza - depending upon how you look at things.
You are right Neil , but you never recognise the fact at the time
DeleteDeep memories. Take care of yourself. We need to gather more while we are still here to share memories.
ReplyDeleteDavid.
DeleteU are so right
Always good to have some humour at a funeral. The Bonanza theme tune will have made many smile, I'm sure, although I'm glad you didn't gallop! How nice that after 35 years, you were still remembered and were able to be part of such a special occasion. xx
ReplyDeleteIt’s a kindness to the grief ridden I always think
DeleteSuddenly we can see our lives as in a book - time moves on - though precious moments remain x
ReplyDeleteIndeed x
DeleteA friend of mine died five or six years ago, from breast cancer. She had us all sing, "Always Look on The Bright Side of Life". It was wonderful and made us all smile.
ReplyDeleteAnother resurgence
DeletePopular funeral songs
My Way – Frank Sinatra.
Angels – Robbie Williams.
The Best – Tina Turner.
Wind Beneath My Wings – Bette Midler.
Always Look on the Bright Side of Life – Eric Idle (Monty Python's 'Life of Brian')
Time to Say Goodbye – Sarah Brightman and Andrea Bocelli.
You'll Never Walk Alone – Gerry and the Pacemakers.
A million love songs – Take That
DeleteBitter sweet symphony – The Verve
Bring him home (Les Mis̩rables) РColm Wilkinson
Can you feel the love tonight – Elton John
Every breath you take – The Police
Come away with me – Norah Jones
How am I supposed to live without you – Michael Bolton
If I could turn back time – Cher
Kiss from a rose – Seal
Knockin’ on Heaven’s door – Bob Dylan
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DeleteBring Him Home really pulls at my heartstrings as do many songs from Les Mis
DeleteSolsbury Hill - Peter Gabriel
DeleteThe Parting Glass - various artists, Hozier probably my favorite.
Recently as the hearse arrived music played outside - the coffin was lifted and carried forwards to " Summer Place" by Percy Faith x
DeleteWhat a lovely post, so full of happy memories. Isn't it nice when the final song to be played at a funeral as you are getting ready to walk back outside, is a favourite happy tune of the loved and lost one. At my Dad's funeral we played his favourite Glen Miller track, one of the really lively numbers and everyone had a grin on their face by the time they got outside.
ReplyDeleteIt’s a gift , that conspiratorial joke x
DeleteThat’s the way to be remembered. And how special for you!
ReplyDeleteHow special for her daughters x
DeleteLove the playing of the Bonanza theme song as the funeral ended. Yee-haw!
ReplyDeleteYes , ironic but oh so not ironic
DeleteDitto the comments above. What a lovely, perfect bit of memory. I love that she had Lorne Greene with her in the coffin. That's really saying something!
ReplyDeleteI think that would have ticked her pink
DeleteHow touching that something you gave her all those years ago was keeping her company. It's nice that we are allowed to tailor funeral services to fit the individual.
ReplyDeleteGod yes….long are the the days that the vicar hadn’t even met the deceased
DeleteThank you for sharing this sweet story and remembrance of your adolescence. xoxo elizabeth
ReplyDeleteIt was another country , far far away
DeleteI love how funerals have become more uplifting and that people get to choose how they want to 'go out.' It sounds like May knew exactly what she wanted, making everyone smile :-) xxx
ReplyDeleteYes, it was also a story of a lady who enjoyed the small things in life…a real celebration
DeleteWhat a wonderful account of your youthful friendships, of welcoming parents like May, and of your continued connection you might have not been aware of, through Purnell Roberts. Your presence at the funeral must have meant a lot to May's family.
ReplyDeleteAnother one for your book.
Hugs!
It was lorne Green x
DeleteAnother wonderful memory .
ReplyDeleteI was glad I attended.
DeleteNow I got that Bonanza tune running through my head! Sorry for the loss of your friend, but it does sound like a corker of a funeral.
ReplyDeleteI go to another very different one on Wednesday 😓😥
DeleteHow wonderful that your gift stayed in her heart all these years, and accompanied her on her final journey. Just shows how important are the small things in life, and how they resonate. I can only imagine how humbled and proud you felt to learn that. I always loved Bonanza (and The Big Valley, anyone else remember that? Barbara Stanwyck and Lee Majors) I always coveted that piebald Little Joe rode: in fact I used to ride an Exmoor pony called Little Joe after the character in Bonanza.....and had not thought of that for years. So thanks for prodding the memory, John! I hope it was a good funeral - sounds like it was. Wonderful bitter sweet memories.
ReplyDeleteI had forgotten about the gift , so when my old friend reminded me of it , I was incredibly touched and it made me want to go more today x
DeleteThinking of the show Bonanza, and when I watched it on Sunday evenings with my sister 61 years ago made me feel rather old, I gave my daughter a ring, she reminded me 'Dad, you are rather old'....bless her heart. Not a bad tune at all for a funeral.
ReplyDeleteIt made everyone smile and I’m sure I wasn’t the only one who had the urge to gallop out
DeleteI can still sing it from memory, but I couldn't miss this opportunity to hear it again.
ReplyDeleteLorne green sang the original and did it well
DeleteOh john , more stress!
ReplyDeleteYou seem to attract it
Keith
Xx
I's touched--and impressed---that they played a song with the person's personal interest. Have you ever thought about what songs they should play for you?
ReplyDeleteI’m * typo. lizzy
DeleteFor some reason it always surprises me when Brits and Europeans are heavily into some old American pop cultural thing. IDK why. I just think of Bonanza as such a particularly AMERICAN thing. Americans being interested in where their ancestors came from makes sense. Europeans being interested in American westerns, what’s the draw? It’s such a tiny piece of even our short history. Not being snotty, just wonder.
ReplyDeleteI would watch anything that had horses in it when I was young. Now I look back and see how cruelly the horses were treated in Westerns.
Deleteso glad to hear you honored May and saw old friends. Funny that the Bonanza theme song played..... made me reminisce about an old (long gone) friend of mine at whose memorial the Willie Nelson song *Crazy* was playing! It was fitting, as was Bonanza theme!
ReplyDeleteSusan M/ Calif.
As a youngster, I always wanted to be the mum whose house was full of teens. When I got to that point I was just too overwhelmed and probably introverted to do it so I think people like May are very special.
ReplyDeleteWhat great memories and what a fun idea for the funeral.
Why are there no longer any weekly Cowboy programmes on TV? There were several when I was young, and they were always good fun. Maybe they are now seen as non-Woke.
ReplyDeleteI find it fascinating that it's possible to buy a figurine of Lorne Greene! What a touching memory.
ReplyDeleteA delightful older man at my last location was a bit of a mover and shaker. He was also a Quaker, and when he died, he allowed his good friend, a Methodist minister to officiate his service, which was held at the funeral home rather than the Quaker Meetinghouse.
ReplyDeleteMany stood up to share beloved memories from all walks of life: bikers, white haired old ladies, teenagers who'd received some of his counsel. We were quite tearful as the ceremony drew to a close. Methodist Minister Mel asked the crowd to stand and accompany the casket its way out of the funeral home. We solemnly nodded, stood with tear-streaked faces, and just as the casket was raised by the pall bearers, the most delightful Dixie land jazz music came through the speakers. Everyone broke out in a smile as we followed the pall bearers.
I now think of that kind man every time I hear Dixie land jazz played.