Nipples

 I think I will resurrect the International Novelty fruit& Veg Competition in next years Trelawnyd Flower Show. 

What do you think?


Speaking of nipples

Anyhow, my favourite " nipple" story hails from 1986.
I was a very new Registered Psychiatric staff nurse on a " mother and baby" unit in York and was attending one my very first staff meetings in the day room which led off the main entrance . The ward sister was a phenomenally calm and obese woman who never raised her voice even in the most fraught of situations and I remember that right in the middle of discussing a particularly knotty nursing problem , she stopped and raised her hand.

" now I don't want anyone to turn around, or to react in any way" she murmured quietly
" but some unfortunate lady is trying to push her nipples under the sash window"

Now that's professionalism !

55 comments:

  1. Between your story and the picture, I had a good morning chuckle here John.

    xox

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  2. Maybe the unfortunate lady was hoping someone would shut the sash window - just for the thrill of it.

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    1. I think you live your life in a carry on movie xx

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  3. Anonymous12:14 pm

    I hope that Rachel competes again!

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  4. Krayolakris12:29 pm

    Yes please do bring them back, they’ve been missed! And now I can’t stop giggling!

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    1. Nice one, those melons made the vegetable judges day as I recall, he was ticked pink by them

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  5. LMAOOO
    Oh dear. I came for the title. Stayed for the photo and thoroughly enjoyed the anecdote. Good Friday omens!

    XOXO

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    1. Trying to give my public what they expect xx

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  6. Yellow Shoes1:12 pm

    The ward sister sounds a jewel.

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    1. She was, and I’ve blogged about her before….she was the inspiration for my best metaphore
      I remember telling her as she once thundered down the corridor in a flowing dress
      “ you are like a galleon in full sail “

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  7. Barbara Anne1:27 pm

    That story is priceless and one for your book, no doubt!
    As for the Flower Show veggies, do include the notation, "please use your d good judgement and thank you!

    Hugs!

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  8. Anonymous1:35 pm

    Ouch. Gigi

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  9. Sent to Spam Jail again!

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  10. What a splendid pair of nipples in that photo!
    I'm trying to imagine why that lady was trying to push her nipples under the sash window? Whatever the reason, it must have been painful. My eyes are watering! xx

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  11. Oh god....not the nipples under the sash! Haha!

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  12. This early job prepared you for any possible event. It is said there is only a fine line between sanity and insanity. JG is prepared for it all. Have fun with the veg competition.

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    1. Psychiatric nursing homed my sense of humour to perfection

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  13. Sach windows often fall down without warning.

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  14. weaver2:25 pm

    Oh dear John - all I can say is that I can think of worse things that could have been being pushed under the sash window. (I blame you for getting my mind even thinking of such things) You cheer me up on the very dullest of days.

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    1. Yes many of the mums on the until was breast feeding

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  15. Definitely resurrect the fruit & veg competition! šŸ˜Š
    Thanks ever so much for the laughs today.
    Have a pleasant weekend.

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  16. Did everyone suppress the giggles?

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    Replies
    1. There was lots of urgent movements and a sheet was fashioned into a body wrap

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    2. Anonymous1:57 pm

      WERE urgent movements not Was.
      A good way for you to remember -
      Was is singular and Were is plural.

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  17. Anonymous3:56 pm

    Why did you have to make a point of saying the ward sister was obese? Would you have said that to her face? It's an offensive comment and not needed in your narrative.

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    1. It paints a story so it was needed in my opinion

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  18. I love the description..it paints the whole scene and is not offensive atall

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    1. Is was never intended to be

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    2. Anonymous10:31 pm

      Yes, there’s nothing offensive about being obese. I like that you mentioned it—I think it gives her a splendid gravitas, to go with her calm demeanor.
      —Fresca

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    3. Anonymous11:16 pm

      Agree! I love fat women who walk the earth with solidity and strength. I lost weight due to a health issue and I miss being one. Also they give the best hugs. Yes to novelty veg. Anything joyful is good! Tina in west oz

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  19. Yes please to bringing back the competition!! I've always enjoyed the wonderfully creative entries. And one year even created an entry myself, which was very satisfying.

    That's a great story :)

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    1. Well I look forward in your next creation

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  20. Thanks for the Friday funny!

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    1. You are very welcome , a bit of silly frivolity is always welcomed

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  21. That's a very nice pair of nipples! Look forward to the fruit and veg competition photos.... such an enjoyable feast for the eyes. Your ward sister sounded a bit like Hattie Jaques!

    Jo in Auckland

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  22. Tracy8:31 pm

    I have never tried to push my nipples under a sash window, but having breast-fed two babies I have an inkling of what that might feel like!

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  23. Somehow I feel that cannot be the end of this particular story.

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  24. Remembering the discomfort of rock hard boobs, I would think she didn't go far enough!
    Thanks for acknowledging the matron's professionalism. It makes all the difference

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  25. I reckon she was practicing for a mammogram!

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    1. You hit the nail on the head! Unbelievable what we go through.

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  26. That unfortunate woman could accidentally lose them doing that.

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