My elder sister Ann has run the Prestatyn Flower Show for some 25 years, helped ably by a large and dedicated set of affable despot types.
Covid had put paid to the last two shows and without the impetus and with difficulties with an older committee demographic and other logistical problems she has decided to pull the show for good.
I understand her emotions , having gone through the same thing just three years ago, but there is something to be said for letting things go whilst on top .
I collected two of her Show’s trophies that I had donated
The Joan Gray Cup and The Wynyard Cup came back home this morning.
I’ve been researching if I can book a plot for myself in the village graveyard.
It’s not as easy as you may think
This afternoon, I’ve booked some on line meetings regarding my second pension and looking at how best to pay for my funeral which will be sorted out well before I kick the bucket.
Perhaps it’s because I’m six months off sixty that I’m revisiting things like my will, my funeral plot and expenses my death would create .
I don’t want anyone else to be burdened with any of this shit…..
Sounds like your whole family are community boosters. Running anything for 25 years is a major accomplishment and contribution to local culture!
ReplyDeleteYes I think we inherited the community thing from my father
DeleteIt's a good idea to plan ahead like that, but we who follow your life with great affection, hope the end of it is a long time off. Hoping for health and happiness for you.
ReplyDeleteThank u
DeleteLet’s hope so
Sixty is the age I have targeted to start preparing things. By then, the house and the truck will be paid off and I will need to decide where my finances will go.
ReplyDeleteYes …it’s a milestone for sure
DeleteYour sister certainly devoted many generous years to the flower show. Times change and people change, she's probably decided it is time to move on. Ordering life is an ongoing task. No sooner do you organize order, things change again. It's a process.
ReplyDeleteYes priorities change and so do passions
DeleteIt's good to think ahead, as morbid as it may seem. We need to do the same. We've been putting it off and we shouldn't.
ReplyDeleteYes , I ve put quite a bit off , it’s time to buckle down and sort out all the unpalatable
DeleteI think it fitting that your Sister should be given a Silver Award for all she has done-it would be nice -I bought my plot when I was in my early 30s-I have tried it out-it's nothing fancy just a reserved space alongside my parents x
ReplyDeleteShe has already earned a British Empire Medal in the Queens new year honours for her work
DeleteWow! Congratulations to your sister!
DeleteThank u
DeleteShe ran it brilliantly well too, it was like a well oiled and well loved machine, but the time always has to come to call it a day.
ReplyDeleteMost of our family favours cremation rather than burial, so I don't have to worry about any plots. I do have to consider how to get both my Mums and Dads ashes over to the Isle of Man in the future. We only usually carry hand luggage when we fly and ashes are not the small light-weight things a lot of folk think they are. It's lucky we can all joke about this, my Mum included.
I forgot you actually went to it and entered it like you did to mine xx
DeleteWell done, Ann! What a wonderful example of community service she has - as do you. Do you suppose someone else will take the reins of the Prestatyn Flower Show?
ReplyDeleteWe, too, should be making end of life plans and at this point are leaning toward donating our empty shells to a medical school.
You do need to move the folded clothes so Dorothy doesn't have to lean so far to her left to see you!
Hugs!
No the committee like my committee agreed it was time to stop
DeleteJohn, have you thought of green burial? Much less expensive both monetarily and effects on the environment. I have mine paid for and am glad that my family won't have to deal with anything ... other than notifying the Preserve.
ReplyDeleteI think I will go as green as I can regarding the coffin. Etc but I would like to be buried in the graveyard next to my field and cottage
DeleteOf course, what a lovely idea. Can I be buried next to you?
DeleteI forgot to mention I am funny and very good company.
DeleteThe ideal neighbour
DeleteI say go for it. You will be a cheerful addition to the cemetery.
DeleteLol
Delete25 years! What fantastic service and dedication. So pleased she's been recognised for it. We made our wills several years ago, but we must get round to making our Lasting Power of Attorneys. Not pleasant thinking about one's own demise, but it comes to us all. xx
ReplyDeleteYes , I just want a checklist that is ticked off so the poor fucker who has to sort out my final wishes has a clear run
DeleteWe've decided on cremation. I'm leaving my sons instructions that they are to take my ashes to my birthplace and my husband is going to his. That way our sons will see where we came from.
ReplyDeleteSimple and clear
DeleteI think that it would be great to be buried near to the place you love. Please make sure that you have everything documented and clear to anyone following. Just when you think you have everything foolproof, they come up with better fools. I had some 'interesting' moments when we came to bury my uncle.
ReplyDeleteYes , the plot may be difficult because the church of wales won’t allow you to pre book
ReplyDeleteIt may depend on the parish. My mother was buried in the Church of Wales and I thought that she may have pre-booked, but I'm not sure. If everyone knows what you want, though, then that is a real help to those left behind.
DeleteI’ve already checked with the ex vicar and village elder Islwyn who knows EVERYTHING graveyard
DeleteA good reminder to sort this out ahead of time...
ReplyDeleteYes .I thought today
DeleteWho would sort all my shit out ?
Then I realised
Well, me
Thinking of dying and you are not yet sixty! I am a quarter century older than you and (unless Omicron strikes) death is not in my thoughts and plans. Stop being morbid! Roderick
ReplyDeleteNot morbid, just realistic and sensible. We've all got to go and if we can make things a bit easier for those having to deal with it all, why not?
DeleteRoderick , will jay , ..so many “ new” commentators !
DeleteI went to a green burial today - my friend was very spiritual and didn't want a religious ceremony, she is buried next to her husband in a field (Olney Green Burial) with a tree placed near the spot. That is one option but I am going to be cremated and my ashes placed beside my father, mother and sister. The main thing is that the persons wishes are adhered to.
ReplyDeleteAgreed
DeleteI’ve already written my gravestone
Here slumps John Gray
Loving friend, brother and husband
Back Home
If you can't get a plot in Trelawnyd churchyard, I will be happy to bury you at the allotments in The Rivelin Valley, Sheffield. All I need is some cash for the van hire and diesel. £2000 should cover everything.
ReplyDeleteA little bit of me would like to be cremated and a further little bit of me scattered from the top of Weston park hospital
DeleteI expect to be around complaining until I’m 123, but was thinking today we need to update our wills and figure out how our funerals will be handled… and where. We did that all ages ago when we were very young (you’re never too young to get those things taken care of and out of your head). Little of what we did applies here in Spain!
ReplyDeleteI’m a control freak my friend….but I honestly don’t want be be a burden
DeleteI love the way Miss Dorothy manages to get into every single shot she can.
ReplyDeleteAgree also about arrangements for one's death and funeral - I certainly do not wish to leave any arrangements to anyone else.
She follows me everywhere so the odds are that she WILL be in shot. I will keep her ashes when she dies , and the ashes will be buried with me
DeleteGood heavens! I saw the entry title and picture of Albert and...
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like your sister and her group are going out on top of their game. Congratulations for a job well done for its appointed season!
You're right to tidy up your paperwork and planning. It is always easier to do when there is no compelling emergency. I probably need to go back and review mine, things change in 15 years.
Will Jay
I don’t want to be a burden to someone
DeleteI'm being cremated and having my ashes mixed with those of the dog's and thrown into the ocean. Never liked funerals. The last thing I want is a bunch of old farts gathered around remarking with their old, creaky voices about how I was such a nice guy. If they can't say it to my face while I'm alive, why give them the opportunity after I'm dead.
ReplyDeleteI get what you say , but I’m very conceited and want a big do
DeleteEven though I won’t see it, having said this my reality will probably be very differentb
You could always make your remains useful and donate them to medical science. I have signed the forms to do so and it means nobody has to pay anything at all for disposing of me (provided I get accepted, which depends on how I die - they won't take anyone who has had a post mortem). Failing that, I am sure the rabbits will enjoy burrowing in through rotten cheap wood and snuggling in with what's left of you in Trelawnyd churchyard). There is nothing morbid about facing inevitable reality, then getting on with life, I reckon.
ReplyDeleteI’ve been to the autopsy suite
DeleteI will pass
Ah, so have I, (the teaching one) but I found it wonderful and inspiring, and the decay of the grave is a far from pretty place, or the furnace of the crematorium; none of which matters in any case of course, for wherever our remains are and whatever happens to the, we won't be there. And many people's remains will end up in that autopsy suite whatever they have chosen, depending on how they die. Anyway, I feel it is a debate about things that don't actually matter to us, other than being comfortable when alive in the choice we made. That matters.
DeleteI’m a firm believer to support whatever wish anyone has
DeleteThere’s not a shortage of bodies
Wholeheartedly agree with the first line but not with the second. I have recently been informed some UK medical schools are dropping or severely curtailing dissection due to lack of bodies; but perhaps I have been misinformed. Anyway, of course people should be supported with whatever they choose.
DeleteOne reason I return to read you so often. Common sense is too hard to be found and you overflow with it.
ReplyDeleteLol , lots would disagree deArheart x
DeleteI let my brother have a pauper's funeral at the expense of Wiltshire County Council. It was the least I could do under the circumstances.
ReplyDeleteI suddenly want to know his and your story
DeleteI always wanted a burial at sea (it's a soul thing), but the cost ran into tens of thousands even some years back, due to all the regulations, red tape and general you-can't do-that becauseABC-fuckery. Maybe I'll just walk into the sea one night.
ReplyDeleteOr get your ashes flushed down the bog
DeleteMy husband says he wants his ashes scattered at Wassett Fell in North Yorkshire as it’s the only way he’ll get me up it. I’ve told him they’ll be scattered into the sea at Seaton Carew beach as he spends so much of his life down there with the dogs 😂
DeleteMy mother in law did that. Even sorted out with her priest how she wanted her mass. Didn't think much of it when she told us, but years later when she died of pancreatic cancer, we were so exhausted, I cannot tell you how very grateful we were that all we had to do was make a couple of phone calls, then turn up when and where were we told.
ReplyDeleteThank you Amanda
DeleteYour comment says everything x
It would have been easier if my parents had made plans ahead, saved some strife. I inherited a cemetery lot I don’t want, and have failed in trying to figure out how to give it away to someone who might need it.
ReplyDeleteMy dad left a scrap of paper on which he had written songs he wanted at his funeral he wasnt religious. Didnt people to be there very long.
ReplyDeleteIt made arrangements so much easier knowing his wishes.