George

I guessed right

The Royal Prince of Cambridge

Will be a 

GEORGE

A Phone Call From A Stranger

I heard a rather heart warming story yesterday.
The Red Faced Welsh Farmer's son stopped his tractor for a chat just as the storm clouds fizzled into nothing over the village. Like his father, he's a straight talking  country bloke but shows a softer , more articulate side when you get beyond the pleasantries.
The RFWF' S mentioned that he keeps far too many contacts in his mobile phone. He was sorting through them the other day and picked out a name of a person he hadn't spoken to for at least a couple of years.
On impulse he give the number a call , but the guy that answered was not his former mate, but was in fact a complete stranger from Birmingham.
Being a sociable soul, the RFWF'S started to chat to the unknown guy on the other end of the phone.and after a few minutes of friendliness he said his goodbyes but not before the stranger thanked him for calling.
" I had been having one of the worst days of my life" the stranger honestly confided
" your call's turned all that around..."
Kismet? Fate? Call it what you will
I thought it was all rather lovely.

No Apologies

I am a Royalist

No apologies

No explanations

End of statement

Disgusted from Tunbridge Wells

OMG

It's happened

It's finally happened

I have officially and dare I say willingly joined the ranks of all sad middle aged " disgusted from Tunbridge Wells" letter writing, " nothing better to do" old farts....and I have caught myself leaving a public note out complaining of the amount of dog shit on our lane.

Ok, I did hand write the notice ( rather than print it out in some gothic script) and I didn't resort to some passive/ aggressive platitude.........favouring a more direct " don't do it" kind of message

However

!

I DID laminate the notice and I did feel the need to write the bloody thing in the first place.

bollocks!

It's official

I am now my father!

God help me...... What next?

Will I be believing everything that's written in the Daily Mail?

Will I start to buy those sensible pants from the Sunday supplements ?

And will I start developing a crush on the likes of Carol Vorderman and Edwina Currie?

All I do know...is that I have finally turned into a monster

people that make me Larf

Just making an idle list
Paloma Faith ( popular singer)
Simon Anstall ( TV presenter)
Sandra bullock
Simon Pegg ( actor and Scottie impersonator)
Jamilia, ( singer)
Josh Grogan ( Classical singer who does not take himself too seriously)
Miriam Margolyes ( lesbian nut case)
Joan Rivers ( Jewish bitch)
John Highfield ( friend) below

Mo Molam( politician)
Greg Davies ( tall comic)
Victoria Wood ( comic)
Miranda Hart ( another tall comic)
Miles Jupp ( posh comic)
Henning Wehn ( German comic)
Ruth Gordon ( actress)
Julia Roberts ( yes she's funny)
Kate Winslett ( warm as toast)
Catherine Bramwell Booth ( Salvation Army Pioneer) ( look her up on you tube) below

Maureen Lipman ( actress)
Nuala Dixon( best friend)
Tom Stepenson ( blogger and acid wit)

Tom

Morgan Freeman
Mae West
Audrey Tatou( French actress)

Beatrice Lillie (Thouroughly Modern Millie)
I could go on

Waiting For The Rain ( and for the Royal baby)

 The thunderstorms that we have been promised, have not arrived as yet, and the garden flowers are hanging on in there without a proper drink so to speak. Tonight I have cut more blooms  from the rose bushes and borders and have filled the cottage with colour. It's been a white heat sort of hazy day, and too hot to stick,to one job outside for too long.
We need the rain
The dogs are on predator watch as we speak. I caught a young fox peeping into the field from the pond around 3 pm. The Indian runners legged it to the safety of the field gate  and when I brought the terriers back to guard the poultry, the birds crowded around them like groupies.
It's funny they know that the dogs mean safety
Especially as I always think that the welsh terriers have typical fox colouring
.
Auntie Gladys popped down earlier ( a bag of scones were tied to the front door) she has spent the last couple of afternoons sunbathing in her own front door, and was asleep when I passed.
The village looks dry and parched
The thunderstorms, when they come , are going to be most welcome
Chris is working away all week.
I vaguely wonder if the woman with the cheap shoes had a crap day
I hope she did

Ha

One Liner

Hot weather brings the best and the worst out in people.

I stopped at the petrol station in Rhuddlan on my home from work this morning

( I needed an emergency scotch egg)

And as the heat of what will be the hottest day of the year 

Hit me like one of those waves of heat you get when you exit the aeroplane on a sunshine holiday

I bumped into a young woman in the doorway of the shop.

"You TWAT!" The woman spat out under her breath just as I mumbled an apology

And I stood there for a moment lost for words as she stalked away

Just before she closed her car door, I tried to recover, despite being knackered after a night shift

All I could counter with

Was a lame but very precise call of

" CHEAP SHOES!"

Watership Down

Well Roland is hanging on in there. His back leg has what I suspect to be some nerve damage, and is looking pretty useless, but in general baby rabbit terms , he looks quite bright and indeed feisty.
( you can tell this by the way I have him in a rather firm strangle hold in the above photo)
If it wasn't for his gammy leg, I would have released him by now...so I suspect his only chance will be a wildlife rescue centre.
I will keep him in the spare hen house for a few more days....to see how he improves
He has just started to eat now, cabbage leaves,grass, stale bread with an occasional garnish of green grapes!

In 1972 Richard Adams wrote the wonderful Watership down which was, ( for those few that dont know) an non patronising, mature adventure story featuring a wild group of rabbits and their search for a new home.
I was eleven when I first read it, and I enjoyed the novel as much then as I did last year when I re read it. Like To kill a Mockingbird , it is one of those rare reads that can be enjoyed by adults and children alike
There is no Internet " data" to support this, but I suspect that rabbit sales in the early 1970s soared after Watership Down's publication. On reflection, it surprises me that I never bought one.....after all I adored the novel with a passion. Having said that, I did have several guinea pigs, numerous shoals of tropical fish, a gaggle of red eared terrapins and a large sweet jar full of stick insects to look after, so rabbits, were not a high need on my agenda
Filled with rabbit nostalgia, I aim to dig out my old copy of Adams' novel today and I will start it on my break at work tonight.
If you have not read it....please do so......it's a cracking tale ........a bit like game of thrones with fluffy bits.