Going Gently

Sigh

It was too late to pick the dogs up as it was past eleven when I left the railway station!

So The cottage was practically deserted when I finally got home.

But I was bloody right about Albert

Two sets of rodent intestines were laid out on the living room floor

And for some strange reason there was a cat turd in the bath!
Nice to be home!

Well the last post was far too sad for such a sunny day..so as I finish " giving birth" on the loo ( thankfully my Kent Constipation has now FULLY resolved itself) I shall post my final blog entry for our brief holiday!
I've had a lovely time with the Prof and his family.........and I am sad to leave the picturesque Broadstairs for the gloom and colder Welsh countryside. The Prof is staying on until Monday as he has meetings in London and unfortunately I am working tomorrow so need to get home to save lives on ITU
So it's real life later today, no doubt there will be a headless rabbit on the kitchen floor. No doubt Cameron the teenage boffin has slaughtered half the poultry and no doubt my dogs will be bursting a gut to be home....
Hey ho

No One

A poster supporting the work of age concern

I saw it on one of the kent trains

" No one to say good morning to

No one to bless you when you sneeze,

No one to take tea with

Or whiskey, for that matter.

No one on the end of a phone.

No one to share anything with,

a cake, a laugh or a problem.

No one to make one day

any different from the rest.

No one to turn to.

No one, but no one

should have no one."

Thoughts From Thanet

The 2015 Bake Off Contestants

I see that " The Great British Bake Off" is back next week!
Bloody hell, I'd hate to be a researcher on that show. I can hear the producer giving his/her spiel to the BBC minions quite clearly " Scour the British Isles for a dozen TOTALLY different individuals THAT CAN FRIGGING BAKE A CAKE! .........I want black, I want white, I want modern stay at home dads, I want young, I want old, I WANT TATTOOS! I need one that could be taken as a baddie! I NEED a few home county ladies to satisfy the Women's institute fans and if you can GET ME A LESBIAN IN A WHEELCHAIR FROM THE ISLE OF MAN...I'll GIVE YOU A RISE!
I love the " Bake off"
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Today we have been booked on a guided tour of St Peters Village. This afternoon tis the beach and this evening is dinner out with Chris' brother and his wife........which will be nice......last night we took ourselves off to Broadstairs for a few drinks and to watch the fireworks on the beach which was fun......I'm now off to read the paper on the loo for a while......here's hoping that will " do the trick"

I'll leave you with a Banksy Mural we saw in Margate yesterday and with the latest International Novelty Vegetable Entry for the Flower Show.......I need all entries in by the weekend if possible!
Hey ho

Smelling Of Old Lady's Knickers

I'm constipated.

I'm sure you all don't need to know that...but as I am holiday, I know that Going Gently is sadly lacking it's usual dose of poo stories.......I guess its a product of the change of pace, routine and sitting in a car for so long yesterday such are the sensibilities of a half century colon.........I bought some senna tablets this morning from Boots then pulled the soddin box out onto the Marks and Spencer counter when I was paying for a pair of new beach shorts.

The woman assistant laughed when I did....... Which was a blessing........she was a sturdy girl and looked as though she was no stranger to the odd hard stool too!

Anyhow we have had a nice relaxed day today......we went to Turner Centre in Margate to see the Grayson Perry exhibition.Margate is an odd mixture of dying seaside town which has obviously seen better days, and an up and coming bespoke retail centre.

We walked around the new shops in the old part of town, and bought a new lead for William ( complete with it's own bandana- which will be custom made for us AND SENT onto Wales ,! - how friggin GAY is THAT?)

Had a bit of a pang in the shop though as the owner presented us with her elderly Fox Terrier to make a fuss of. Funny how these little " face slaps" arrive out of the blue.

This afternoon we have joined Chris' family on Broadstairs beach ( pic) and I am just about to dive into the latest David Sidaris ....here's hoping the senna doesn't kick in too soon.......the public toilets are a good jog away and I don't think I have a 20p for the turnstile!

Postscript.....Flower Show News...

Big thanks to June ( Consort to Richard ( Chris' Dad) who

has hand sewn 86 lavender bags to sell at the show....it was

very kind of you to make the effort.....our bedroom presently smells of old lady knickers!

And thanks to Hannah & Milo who have just emailed their entries for the show.....bring on the novelty veg challenge....

Blue Birds Over.....

To me , a holiday gives you the opportunity for a lie in.
Unfortunately The Prof and his mother are early risers, so no matter how quiet the house it at 7 am, you know that some surreptitious activity is afoot!
Hey ho.
Today, tis " Dover and Whistable " day ! Hurrah!
The Prof's father is taking us to the cliffs and to some interesting tunnels inside......which will be nice as long as I don't get car sick! ( an unfortunate affliction I seem to suffer from in other people's cars) and then it's a sea food lunch towards the famous oyster beds.......having said that, it would take God almighty himself to get me to down an oyster...I've always thought that they look like lumps of snot!

The prof eating a bowl of the slippery little suckers

Anyhow.....here are the latest on line International Novelty Veg Entries for the flower show.....a teddy and a shark!
Enjoy...........more exciting stories from the Thanet Coast will be posted later xxx

Do You Like Melons?

The Prof's family have a beach hut on Broadstairs beach. They have had one for a couple of generations. Apparently you " stake" your beach area with judicial usage of chairs, wind breaks and an assortment of plastic furniture so that no member of the general public ventures within a gnat's crotchet of your encampment.....Think the settlement of Alexandria in The Walking Dead and you will get my gist......
The Prof made himself comfortable as Sorrel and I had a chat about nothing....these "nothing"conversations drive him to distraction.......which makes them even more entertaining.
Sorrel " I love slices mango and melon"
John: " Do you?........I am a bit partial to pineapple chunks myself"
Sorrel: " Really?"
The Prof " harrumphs" at this point.
John " yes......especially tinned pineapples"
Sorrel" thats strange, I would have thought you'd go for fresh

Brief silence

Sorrel: " Do you like raspberries John?"
John " I've gone off them a bit "
Sorrel " hum"
John:" they are a bit bland, the ones from the supermarket"

Sorrel " What about strawberries?"
The Prof then sighs very loudly and shifts in his deck chair
John" Oh I love stawberries ! ........"
Sorrel " I love them too"
Prof ( under his breath ) " oh For fuck's sake"

Long silence

Sorrel " John......what Are your thoughts on passion fruit?"
The Prof screaming into the wind " OH MY GOD........I WAS ADOPTED!!!!!!"

Broadstairs!

The Roger Moore Eyebrow in full tilt