" Bring It On!"

Some people relish confrontation.
Most people however, shy away from it, as they would shy away from a smelly fart in a lift.
I tend to lean towards the latter group, however when my dander is up, I can turn into a cross between Bette Davies and a Jerry Springer guest if the mood takes me....but thankfully these times are very few and far between.
The problem with me, is that if I am crossed, I do like to be able to let the person who crossed me know just hiw much of a cow they are. It's kind of satisfying verbally bitch slapping someone even though you always run the risk of getting mega bitch slapped in return.
I'm not very good at saying nothing
But today I am trying to do just that..........
So far...so good....

And do you know what?
It's really f*cking hard!

A Phonecall From Mrs Trellis

Tonight, after some shit tv and a mediocre dinner, I had just promised Chris that I would go up to the garage to buy him some crisps when the phone went.
It was Mrs Trellis.
She was tearful and very upset
Her beloved border collie Sooty had just died peacefully in his bed.
"I've got no-one to tell" she said sadly and Chris immediately turned off the tv so I could hear the full story.
Mrs Trellis and Sooty have been inseparable friends for over a decade. They made a memorable couple  seen almost daily in Trelawnyd., where he would drag her around the village like a rag doll and she knowing his chronic bad temper would yank him into any and every front garden in a futile bid to keep him from snapping at any passing dog.
It was this aggressive nature that caused me and Chris to nickname him Satan.
They were an incongruous couple.

There was nothing I could do but to support and listen as only a dog owner could support and listen
But there was something incredibly sad about an old lady talking about her dead dog, when the dog in question was curled up in his kitchen basket as though he was asleep.
My heart ached for her.
We talked for a while and although I was ready to dig his grave in the dark ,I was grateful that she had arranged for the animal rescue centre to pick him up tomorrow , so  I let her tell me all about their adventures over the years until she had run down like a clock.
I asked her to ring us ,if she needed anything ...there was nothing else I could do

I finally got to the garage late and bought Chris' favourite Chicken crisps and on impulse I bought an untidy bunch of garage shop flowers that was standing by the entrance. Ones with a couple of odd looking very blue blooms included( you know the sort) and I stopped at Mrs Trellis' neat little house on the way home with them.

"The house is so quiet" she said forlornly when I called in, and I was so glad I had stopped even though all I had to offer was some cheap crap flowers.

No one should be alone...not when you have lost a dear loved one.........even if that loved one was a bad tempered dog who seemed to have hated the world........

Hey ho
Hey 

Suite Française

Every " WW2 Occupied France" movie should have at least one sequence where a long Line of local refugees are strafed by the evil Luftwaffe as they stagger through the French Countryside with their belongings pilled up in handcarts and prams.
It's an iconic and much copied scene.
" Suite Francaise" begins with such a sequence where the fierce Madame Angelier ( Kristen Scott Thomas) and her daughter in law Lucile ( Michellle Williams) who are in the middle of collecting rent from their tenant farmers get caught up in  bombing of Parisian refugees and at first the film looked promising as the camera swoops and follows the terrified French peasants as they flee into the golden wheat on the sides of the road.
But then we left the action and entered the somewhat hackneyed story of Lucile's love affair with nice Nazi Bruno ( Matthias Schoenaerts) as the German occupy the small town of Bussy. Old scores are settled as some of the occupied French tittle-tattle on each other in a bid to survive and Lucile has to finally choose which side she is ultimately on as resistance looms it's head as the German's take charge.
Williams looks like an angel and is ok, if not a little bland as Lucile. Schoenaerts is more impressive as the torn and cultured Bruno, but the whole film is stolen by Scott Thomas who with her icy stare and powdered white face, is more frightening than any Wartime Hun psychopath , in her role of a cynical and embittered mother, widow and patriot.
She can fight my corner anytime!

7/10

The Search For Jesus

The Welsh Flag outside Gay Gordon and Big Mary's bungalow was not flying yesterday so I briefly thought something unfortunate had happened to one or both of them.
I need not have worried for as I stood on the pavement the bungalow door opened and a booming voice rang out
" Hold on Flower! "
I did what I had been told as Gordon appeared in a string vest.
" Congratulations" , he sang out giving me a carrier bag with a card and present inside
" We heard you had got married!"
The gift was two cut glass whiskey glasses.
" by the look of you, I thought you'd like a drink" Gordon boomed, his piggy eyes blinking benignly behind his specs........
It was very sweet of them.

Anyhow, I have just realised with some sadness that the transgender hen Jesus has disappeared from the Ukrainian Village flock.........he/she has been suffering from a degree of wanderlust over the past few month and could be seen ambling alone over the neighbouring fields as far as Basil's sheep field towards the Felin most days

Perhaps he was on retreat

Last night Jesus didn't return home.
I stood on the lower field border at dusk and called out his name
( a fact that made the livery staff at the stables prick up their ears and laugh)
But there was nothing.........
RIP Jesus.........

The baby jesus in early 2014

" Have you got a big poo stuck up your botty?"

Does anyone else here talk to themselves a lot?
I do all of the time!
On the field , out in the village, in the car and walking the dogs are the times I can be most often caught chattering away about this, that or another, whether it be verbal list making , film and tv reviews or reenactments of conversations or events.
I seldom talk to the dogs when out as I keep conversations with them simple and confined to clear orders but I do at times lapse into an occasional bout of " doggy speak" when something of any note occurs..... ( dog owners and parents of small children will understand this phenomenon very well)
Today was a case in point
It's been raining all day, so in an effort to keep cleaner I took the dogs for their long walk on the old railway walkway in Dyserth. The path is usually busy with walkers, but because of the weather, I found myself alone today........perfect " talking to myself" surroundings!
For a mile or so , I played a verbal game with myself by listing the casualties in The Walking Dead in consecutive order ! ( like you do!) and only stopped when Meg started to get into trouble passing a rather overgrown turd!
Like a theatrical mother , I placed my hands on my hips and in my best, slightly disapproving  mommy voice uttered the above title quote
" Meg..have you got a big poo stuck up your botty again?"
Before she could offer me an embarrassed look or indeed an answer, a grinning man on a bike who had suddenly materialised tried to manoeuvre around me.
" sounds painful" he said as he peddled off.
I was still blushing when we arrive back at the berlingo , ten minutes later.

The Great British Sewing Bee ( spoilers)

Now I risk sounding like my mother, when I say that Thursday is a good tv night!
I am afraid that is all over with now.......I used to follow the Scandanavian thriller " Fortitude" until it got overly wierd and up it's own arse in a bad " what the fuck is all this about?" Kind of way...
and " The Great British Sewing Bee" sadly finished it's third run tonight with an impressive finale between mature Air Hostess Lorna, familyman nice guy Matt and the army major Neil and it was a real pleasure watching nice people, be nice to each other whilst they completed nicely difficult tasks with biased binding...

In the end good natured Matt won the competition ........a civilised, easy going and surprisingly well received tv reality show about real talent

Nothing Much

• After a shift at the hospital, I eat breakfast, feed and water the animals then take the dogs for a brisk morning walk before going to bed for a couple of hours. I have found that if you squeeze every ounce of urine and poo out of the pack, then they will all, come to bed and lie still and quiet for the duration........this is what I noticed before bed
• Animal Helper Pat caught me swearing and waving my arms madly at rooks stealing the poultry corn on the field from her bedroom window. she must think me a loon.
• The man who has moved into Beryl Evans' old house  has a vintage campervan, I wonder if he is the sort of character to enter something in the Flower Show. Mentally I make a note to drop him off a schedule when they are are printed up. The new owners of the recently sold bungalow  on London Road and the tenants of Anchor House will have the same courtesy. I'll recruit new entrants if it kills me
• The ever cheerful foreman on the renovation project houses next to the village hall congratulated me on the wedding as I passed. He's off on a stag night to Dublin tomorrow and is looking forward to be getting pissed!
• Auntie Gladys has some new bright yellow daisy flowers standing proud in her front parlour window
• There is new scaffolding up against the south wall of the village Hall, I 'll have to ask affable despot Jason what is gong on.......oh and when I do I will have to let him and Gladys know that they were mentioned in Chris' Brother's speech at the wedding! How great was that?
• When I got home there was several late wedding presents to open. Two beautifully wrapped bundles of cards from Angry Parsnip ( bundled with a tea towel cleverly closed with multi coloured chop sticks!) a bottle of champagne from Meurig and nia from up on the main road  and a card from Old Trevor from behind the cottage whose knackered 90 year old knees seem to be having a new lease of life this springtime.
• I have just got into bed and I'm typing this before I fall asleep...it's cold and I have my woolly hat on....all I can hear is the chatter of the sparrow flock in the honeysuckle by the front door, the snoring of a bulldog and the faint honk honk of the geese in the wind.

Wedding Gifts and The Walking Dead

We had some lovely wedding gifts...and I am in the process of writing to everyone who was kind enough to send us something.

We didn't expect anything at all

We had John Lewis vouchers ( be still my beating heart) some lovely dishes, crockery, and kitchen stuff. We were given apple trees,picture frames, some beautiful glassware, a hamper and ten bottles of champagne as well as theatre vouchers, gin and even a crystal electric light.

We also had some money which we will buy some antique silver with...sonething for us to remember the day with.

I am also looking forward in experiencing one of our most eclectic of wedding pressies

I am also back at weightwatchers because if it- i dont want the oine bending too much

Watch this video to see what Chris and I will be doing!

I'll have wear a nappy

Daryl and niceguy gay Aaron!

Episode 13 of The Walking Dead , explored what it is like for traumatised individuals to try to acclimatise again to a normal and safer world. The bereaved Sasha  got mean and moody, Carol hoarded weapons and psychotically threatened a small child that caught her in the act and Abe got drunk at the " welcome to Alexandria " party, so it's clear that " team family" is having a pretty difficult time all told.
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, will be , I am sure, the death knell for one of the main characters, but as we have only three episodes to go...it won't be long for die hard fans to find out who it will be.
I suspect with sadness that it may well be Carol......" Look at the cookies carol...look at the cookies"
Episode was Ok. With fourteen characters in team family and a further score of Alexandrians to be introduced to... I think the narrative now seems all a bit crowded.
Nice to see Daryl having a spaghetti dinner with gay could Aaron and Eric though... Who would have thought it?