" Have you got a big poo stuck up your botty?"

Does anyone else here talk to themselves a lot?
I do all of the time!
On the field , out in the village, in the car and walking the dogs are the times I can be most often caught chattering away about this, that or another, whether it be verbal list making , film and tv reviews or reenactments of conversations or events.
I seldom talk to the dogs when out as I keep conversations with them simple and confined to clear orders but I do at times lapse into an occasional bout of " doggy speak" when something of any note occurs..... ( dog owners and parents of small children will understand this phenomenon very well)
Today was a case in point
It's been raining all day, so in an effort to keep cleaner I took the dogs for their long walk on the old railway walkway in Dyserth. The path is usually busy with walkers, but because of the weather, I found myself alone today........perfect " talking to myself" surroundings!
For a mile or so , I played a verbal game with myself by listing the casualties in The Walking Dead in consecutive order ! ( like you do!) and only stopped when Meg started to get into trouble passing a rather overgrown turd!
Like a theatrical mother , I placed my hands on my hips and in my best, slightly disapproving  mommy voice uttered the above title quote
" Meg..have you got a big poo stuck up your botty again?"
Before she could offer me an embarrassed look or indeed an answer, a grinning man on a bike who had suddenly materialised tried to manoeuvre around me.
" sounds painful" he said as he peddled off.
I was still blushing when we arrive back at the berlingo , ten minutes later.