LOVELY
X
Ta Muchly
I won't blog again until Friday
Off to my Uncle's funeral in Rotherham tomorrow
Thanks to villagers,...... the affable despot Jason and Trelawnyd Val for looking after the dogs on Friday before I get home
It's much appreciated
Thank you
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| Look on kitchen table |
Twanging Of The Underpants
Well Springtime is here!
It's not the weak sunshine that has heralded the season.
It's not the clumps of miniature daffs in the corner of the garden either
No, it's something , just a little more sexually malevolent
that has raised its phallic head when I was bent over the chicken feed bowls this morning
Yes, Bingley's hormones are back!
Now even when he's twanging the elastic band on a guy's underpants
( one of his favourite stalking pastimes)
He remains ever the gentleman.,....and never pulls too hard
But there IS a noticeable insistence in his stalking behaviour which is characterised
by constant heaving breathing and predisposition to 24 hour frotting
Like a guy rubbing himself on you on the London Tube
It's all rather unsavoury
To protect the general public
this warning sign has been dusted off for the summer
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| Health & safety has even reached a small field in North Wales |
I was going to end this post with a quick shot of Albert looking a little brighter
but you will have to settle with one of George looking like a
little statesman,
Albert was last seen ambling towards next door's bird table
with a determined look upon his face
Out & About
Albert is under the weather today and has taken himself off to bed as poorly cats do.
He was vomiting in the night
Our sleep was interrupted by noisy waterfilled retching
And by hysterical dogs running amok
Dogs love poking their noses into cat puke
It's a delightful habit
This afternoon , I took the dogs out to get get Albert some chicken
It has been a lovely spring day
So we spent a little time out and about
The dogs sharing a few of the chicken bits
as we made a quick circular drive a mile or two around Trelawnyd
The North Wales coast
Gop Hill from the North West, Trelawnyd is on the other side
The tiny Norman Church in the neighbouring village of Llanasa
Poor Albert, peaceful in a dog free bedroom
Is it bad form?
Is that wrong?
It doesn't feel wrong
But IS it?
Should I ask for a drumstick?
How bleeding odd was that?
Tesco's now sell the bird as part of their " gourmet " range and I couldn't resist buying a couple of steaks that were reduced in price when I went shopping on Friday.
I don't think the clientele of Tescos Prestatyn are quite ready for ostrich.
Non of it was looking as though it was flying off the shelves
Even though it is incredibly low in fat , Chris refused to have the steaks cooked for his supper, hence my slightly odd choice of breakfast
It was bloody tasty too.
Anyhow that reminds me:-
A man walks into a bar with an ostrich and a cat and sits at the bar. The bartender walks over to them and says, "What can I get for you?"
The man says "I'll have a beer", the ostrich says, "I'll have a beer", and the cat says, "I'll have half a beer and I'm not buying." So the bartender says, "OK, that will be £ 4.87"
The man reaches into his pocket and brings out the exact change and pays him. About an hour later the bartender goes back over to them and says, "What'll you guys have?"
The man says, "I'll have a beer", the ostrich says, "I'll have a beer", and the cat says "I'll have half a beer and I'm not buying." The bartender gets them their beer and says "That'll be $4.87."
The man reaches into his pocket and brings out the exact change and pays him. A couple of days later they come back into the bar and the bartender walks over and asks "What do you guys want today?"
The man says, "I'll have a scotch", the ostrich says, "I'll have a bourbon", and the cat says, "I'll have half a beer and I'm not buying." So the bartender says "OK, that will be £ 8.55 The man reaches into his pocket and brings out the exact change and pays him.
The bartender's curiosity got the best of him and he asks, "Why is it that every time I tell you the amount you owe you always have the exact change in you pocket?"
The man said, "I found a bottle with a genie in it and she granted me 3 wishes. My first wish was that I always have the exact change in my pocket for anything I buy."
The bartender says, "That's a great wish...better than asking for a million dollars. A million dollars will run out but that never will. What were your other 2 wishes?"
The man says, "That's where I screwed up. I asked for a chick with long legs and a tight pussy."
The man reaches into his pocket and brings out the exact change and pays him. About an hour later the bartender goes back over to them and says, "What'll you guys have?"
The man says, "I'll have a beer", the ostrich says, "I'll have a beer", and the cat says "I'll have half a beer and I'm not buying." The bartender gets them their beer and says "That'll be $4.87."
The man reaches into his pocket and brings out the exact change and pays him. A couple of days later they come back into the bar and the bartender walks over and asks "What do you guys want today?"
The man says, "I'll have a scotch", the ostrich says, "I'll have a bourbon", and the cat says, "I'll have half a beer and I'm not buying." So the bartender says "OK, that will be £ 8.55 The man reaches into his pocket and brings out the exact change and pays him.
The bartender's curiosity got the best of him and he asks, "Why is it that every time I tell you the amount you owe you always have the exact change in you pocket?"
The man said, "I found a bottle with a genie in it and she granted me 3 wishes. My first wish was that I always have the exact change in my pocket for anything I buy."
The bartender says, "That's a great wish...better than asking for a million dollars. A million dollars will run out but that never will. What were your other 2 wishes?"
The man says, "That's where I screwed up. I asked for a chick with long legs and a tight pussy."
A First!
Yesterday was a bit of a red letter day
for the Berlingo got a spring clean
An archeologist would have a field day piecing together
a sociological profile of the car's owners once they sifted through
the detritus of its contents
Here is the list
Five neurological testing pen torches
Fifteen ballpoint pens
6 assorted scotch egg wrappers
7 cans of diet coke ( empty)
I desiccated canine stool
I pair of white ( sorry grey) underpants
2 scarves
2 woolly hats
I blue vase of unknown origin
£ 4.26 in assorted coins
a half opened bag of cat litter
The remains of a Marks & Spencer individual pork pie
22 egg boxes
4 books,
I china cup ( no saucer )
1 black sock
an unopened tin of evaporated milk
I jar of swarfega
2 screwdrivers
I dog lead
A photograph of a duck
A toothbrush
A Cadbury creme egg
Assorted food wrappers
A book of stamps
And old box of KFC chicken bones
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