Boob Cakes

I am feeling just a tad nauseous

A case of too much butter icing licked 

I left the strimmer cable in the car today, and Chris took it to work

And so instead of tidying up the field, I have spent most of the afternoon making 

Cakes for the open day

I think I over did the pink icing thing

I've gone all Friggin' Barbie

The Ukrainian Village Pond

For weeks now, village character Islwyn has been tinkering around the field borders constructing me a temporary pond. The idea , planning, implementation and positioning has been his baby so to speak,     I have just watched benignly from the side lines  as a collection of sullen teenage helpers from the village have beavered away creating a shallow saucer pond that measures around fifteen feet in diameter , that is fed by a small canal which tapers away from the spring that runs along the field boundary.

This morning the geese, who are naturally cautious characters, gave the whole water park thing a go for the very first time 

Some village wag commented that the Ukrainian Village will be having street lights installed next!

Me thinks the village will have to be named real soon

In The Eye Of The Beholder

We had a busy shift last night

In the changing room after we had handed over our patients to a clean and scrubbed awake staff

The other male nurses and I climbed wearily into our home clothes

My home clothes consisted of dirty T shirt, dusty kneed pants and my trusty mud stained crocs

I stood in front of two of the more immaculate looking Filipino nurses

And as I looked down at my somewhat eclectic attire

I said wistfully to no one in particular

" I used to be beautiful"

they didn't stop laughing until they reached the main entrance 

Licking Bosoms Into Shape

Early this morning, I have tidied bosoms in readiness for the open day

I will bag up potatoes to sell on the day, and should have spare cabbages and kale too

The only company I had was  radio 4 and the three geese, who waited patiently for spare sprout leaves which they took gently from my hand

It's a no news kind of day

Blue Eyes

I went into work but we were un characteristically quiet
So I took annual leave
And now I am wide awake and it's 23.57pm
Chris is in bed
The dogs are all snoring on the couch
And even Albert is having catty dreams on the back of my armchair
I think I will raid the fridge and watch  STAR TREK......

Good Neighbours

I am going back to bed in a few hours...as this is the weekend that I am working both nights. My neighbour, who is also called John , caught me this morning and offered his services with the setting up of the open day later next week. We are blessed with good neighbours in this little corner  of Trelawnyd. The Open Day is a case in point.  I now have on tap helpers with the setting up, home made ice cream made by another in our freezer and the promise from another couple to open up their lovely garden to the public next Sunday.

It was not always the case.

When we lived in Sheffield we really only knew one set of neighbours. They indeed became life long friends but they were the only people in the street that we knew really well. The other set of neighbours were a bit of a rough family that kept themselves to themselves. They argued a great deal, had a knackered old sofa in their back garden which the teenage lads sprawled on for much of the time and seemed to drink cheap beer by the barrel load.

I remember being in our beautifully tended walled garden one Sunday morning ( I probably was wandering around with a pair of secateurs and a trug)I could hear  but not see the " rough family" bickering with each other as they sat on their garden sofa . They all seemed to be suffering from a hangover.

The mother as I recall was yelling at her sons.

It was one of those " You treat this place like a hotel" type of lecture which went on and on and on

Her final , exasperated plea kind of gave me a back handed complement

" all I am asking for is a little bit of help with the housework!" She rasped

" why oh why can't you all be like that OLD POOF NEXT DOOR AND KEEP THE BLEEDING PLACE TIDY?"

Making A Tit Of One's self

One of the refugees has a chesty cough

I had run out of antibiotics

So I rang the vets

Booked with the receptionist to collect some

And drove up to the surgery late this morning.

The receptionist must have been on her break for only George Clooney

( the GOB smackingly good looking vet) was sat behind the desk eating a sandwich

I straightened my hair and gave him one of my best smiles

And before I could say anything, he stood up and sang out a lusty

" Mr Gray!" 

And suddenly  I went all silly realising that he had actually remembered my name

" you have a good memory for faces, I haven't been in for ages"

I wittered.

George shook his handsome head

" Not really" he answered in his deep chocolate voice

and  picking  up the bottle of antibiotic from the counter,

he added simply and somewhat wryly

" Your name is on the bottle"

Apparently Mugabe Hates Gays

Dare I say

We don't rate him much either