Ooohhhh Arrrhhhhh me hearties!

The former vicarage gardens where the show is held
Yesterday morning was spent taking admission money at The Prestatyn Flower Show. You meet a nice lot of people, you feel useful and you play with money, so it's a win win sort of experience all round and I kind of enjoyed myself.
Of course there are always a few difficult customers.
" How much to come in love?" One old bag asked
" £ 1.50 " I said giving her  big smile
" HOW MUCH?" She shrieked
I repeated myself and added in my best PR voice  " there's lots to see and enjoy"
" You can bugger off" she said huffing away.
So I couldn't resist a call of
" have a nice day" as she left

She wasn't my favourite bad tempered customer.
And Chris can verify this story as he was stood feet away from the exchange, which had to be seen to be believed ( he has actually left his first (AND LAST) comment on GOING GENTLY below!)
  1. I have been asked to verify the truth of this story, which I can. The only thing he missed was that her false teeth fitted none too well, so the oooohhhh and ahhhhss were interspersed with a high pitched whistling of air. Delightful.
    ReplyDelete.......Anyhow
Picture the scene
Very old lady in a blue mac. She walks firmly up to my " meet, greet and pay " table and plonks down a one pound coin.
I smile and say in my best Nanette Newman voice
" I' m sorry admission is £ 1.50 I'm afraid"
She starred at me long and hard
" I am not going to be very long" she muttered
I smiled again
" Admission is still £1.50, you can't just have a pound's worth of a look"

There was then a bit of a stand off.
The pressure was on
The queue was starting to form and she knew she had me at a slight disadvantage
She gave me another long stare
I thought I would play it hard ball
So I looked the old bat straight in the eye and said slowly
" ONE....POUND.....FIFTY.....PLEASE"
She then played her trump card
And I am not exaggerating when I say this,
For suddenly she started to make a noise I can only liken to Robert Newton's Pirate voice from the film TREASURE ISLAND
" arrrhhhhhhhh arrrhhhhhhh arhhhh" she croaked ( thank fuck she didn't add " Jimlad" ....) and I looked helplessly at Chris not knowing just what to do
It's not often you see an old lady giving a pirate impersonation....and a good one at that
" arrhhhh arrrhhhhh" she repeated gnashing her gums at me.....and I did what any self respecting Flower Show admission steward would do in that sort of situation
I waved her through the gate.
John O
Old pirate lady 1






Posted by at 55 comments:

Encore


Chris has been working in London for most of the week
He took one day off to go over to France with his mother 
And he bought me a typically French themed gift
What do you think?

When the visuals are THIS GOOD
A blog is worth repeating
I have been running around the field in it frightening the sheep
Who said ponchos aren't sexy

We could be twins
Posted by at 56 comments:

French Leave

Chris has been working in London for most of the week
He took one day off to go over to France with his mother 
And he bought me a typically French themed gift
What do you think?


Posted by at 52 comments:

Dirty Feet, The Winner Is.........and English but not as we know it

I spoke to Chris last night.
He has been working away all week and will be back today
" have you been looking after yourself ?"
He asked after he heard I had been mooching around Bosoms all day
" yes" I told him
" have you had a bath today?"
" Of course" I replied
And then I looked down at my feet

He knows me well
Ps
Just been down to the Prestatyn Flower Show......my veg box won second prize...my cabbage won second prize and my curly Kale won second prize........always a bridesmaid and never the bride eh?
The winning veg basket.....a worthy winner...the bastard!

My curly kale!


My flowers ( fifth from theleft top row) didnt get placed...bastards!

The Floral Art Section
and to end....
The Open Allotment Day has had some publicity
in the local paper.
Nice Picture of village despot Peter Vincent with "the turkey"
but i have to say that I despair that the twelve year old reported referred to the day
as a FATE
rather than a FETE
Even I know the difference
Posted by at 52 comments:

Bosoms comes up trumps


Before our own flower show here in Trelawnyd, there is the much grander and comprehensive Flower Show down in Prestatyn to contend with. My elder sister Ann, runs this show , and has done for years, so today, is the day that I have to prepare my entries. Tomorrow the show opens.
I have not really got a good eye when it comes to arranging veg, but I hope that the above basket may win me something......
Tally ho
Posted by at 47 comments:

George

I guessed right
The Royal Prince of Cambridge
Will be a 
GEORGE

Posted by at 34 comments:

A Phone Call From A Stranger

I heard a rather heart warming story yesterday.
The Red Faced Welsh Farmer's son stopped his tractor for a chat just as the storm clouds fizzled into nothing over the village. Like his father, he's a straight talking  country bloke but shows a softer , more articulate side when you get beyond the pleasantries.
The RFWF' S mentioned that he keeps far too many contacts in his mobile phone. He was sorting through them the other day and picked out a name of a person he hadn't spoken to for at least a couple of years.
On impulse he give the number a call , but the guy that answered was not his former mate, but was in fact a complete stranger from Birmingham.
Being a sociable soul, the RFWF'S started to chat to the unknown guy on the other end of the phone.and after a few minutes of friendliness he said his goodbyes but not before the stranger thanked him for calling.
" I had been having one of the worst days of my life" the stranger honestly confided
" your call's turned all that around..."
Kismet? Fate? Call it what you will
I thought it was all rather lovely.

Posted by at 36 comments:

No Apologies

I am a Royalist
No apologies
No explanations
End of statement
Posted by at 48 comments:
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