Let down

You tend to get used to some aspects of human misery when you are a nurse. It is not the nicest part of the job, nor is it one that you should ever get blasé about, but when you consistently have to deal with families in crisis you kind of develop a nose for the unbalanced and stressed.

Today was a case in point. I went into work at 4pm, (I was on the unenviable 4pm to 8pm shift) and as I walked into the hospital (looking like Rebecca of Sunnybrook farm-complete with trug of vegetables and 2 dozen eggs for sale. I saw a middle aged woman smoking a cigarette. She looked rather down at heel. Hair a mess, clothes crumpled , forefinger stained with nicotine. She stank of stale beer and was sporting the start of a black eye, and I couldn't help thinking that there was something incredibly forlorn and sad about her resignation and isolation.
She must have touched a nerve with me, for as I passed, I stopped and asked if she was ok.
The woman smiled, but it was a long sad smile and she shook her head
"Just kids........ ", she said "they always let you down, no matter what you do and say for them......don't they?"
I nodded and eventually walked on, there was little I could say or do.....but the image of this disappointed lonely woman has remained with me all evening.

I know what it is like to be disappointed by a parent....sometimes that is just the way of the world, but being let down by your children seems to have a cold hardness about it....., and that in itself must be a very bitter pill to swallow, especially when you think your child has failed in life because of something you did or didn't do.

Message to self.....thank god we have animals...I couldn't quite cope with the awesome responsibility of children!!!

The Vicarage Gardens Prestatyn Flower Show 2009

A brief video from today's show, you can just make out Chris and William standing to attantion at the endof the clip.

Nephew Chris with partner Rebecca and their "prize" Broad bean

First place for my mega courgette ! (I said it was a marrow)

Susan

Hens are like people....., some get sick, no matter what you do for them! Susan is still looking rather poorly, even though she rallied after her serious bout of sickness when we were away in San Fransisco earlier in the year.
I have done everything I can think of to pull her through this time. Antibiotic in her water, lice and parasite treatments, wormer and vitamins! The pasta has helped too, as does the occasional egg, but still she looks anaemic, lethargic and weak.
This morning I have syringed her a good dose of olive oil and sugared water, and she has eaten some white bread and a tiny bit of wheat, but she remains very thin and sick.
There is a general rule of thumb that all sick birds are removed from the flock, so she is at present sitting in a cat carrier overlooking the field.
I know I shouldn't have favourites, but her gentle personality and valliant battle with ill health, over the last few months has endeared her to me somewhat

Kisses,Wild,Wild West ,The Prestatyn Flower Show and duck trauma.

I caught up with Nige at 3.50 pm in Manchester and at 3.55pm we were sitting in the Cornerhouse Cinema, watching an Irish Indie film Kisses (2008).
Growing up next door to each other on a rough estate, 13-year-old Dylan (Shane Curry) and 11-year-old Kylie (Kelly O'Neill) have always been close, bonding over the harsh treatment dished out by their respective families. After narrowly escaping his father's fists one day, Dylan and Kylie hop on a canal barge and sail into the city centre, swearing that they'll never return home again.
I suspect that director and writer Lance Daly, wanted to produce a slightly whimsical fantasy that has something profound to say about the simplicity and needs within childhood, and in part he succeeds thanks primarily to the naturalistic performances, timing and chemistry of his young leads. The pouting. foul mouthed, and incredibly pretty O'Neill is especially good as the spunky, optimistic heroine, .
The problem with Kisses, is that we have seen it all before -and I am talking about the rubbish strewn landscape, the depressing black and white photography and drunken violent parent stereotypes- I didn't really find the whole thing original, which was a pity.
I know that tales of Working class physical and sexual abuse are not easy to watch, even though the tender love story does shine through all of the inner city angst; but having said all that, the direction of two key sequences (the attack on Shane by his father and an abduction attempt of Kylie by paedophiles, are wonderfully tense, and would indicate that Lance Daly would be better off directing a thriller or action film rather than this downbeat love story.
7/10
After the cinema we had a drink in a pub on the way back to Heaton Chapel, then chatted for the rest of the night over pizza and wine.
I returned to Wales this morning on the awful arriva train coastal service, which for some reason seems to attract the true dregs of trailer trash society.
The carriages always seem to be crammed to the gunnells with track suited, beer swilling, rude ,bickering louts and I always think that these train journeys resemble something from the wild West rather than a so called semi rural train service! And all this actually occurs before 10 am!!!!!!!!!!!!
Anyhow,I just about survived the Jerry Springer train journey only to be pampered and cossetted by the genteel surroundings of the Prestatyn Flower show , which opened this morning.
I was excited to see that I won a first place for my Marrow!, and a third place for my cauliflower (which was a bit of a bummer) my jams and vegetable trug, unfortunately were not placed. (which was a shame) Janet won a first for her orchids and Ann won second place for her floral art! Chris and I will go down to the show tomorrow to give all the entries a detailed review. Hopefully the weather will be brighter then, the weather this morning has been truly atrocious

The heavens opened yet again, just as I got onto the field to feed the pigs (it has been raining off and on all morning), and I have never experienced so much heavy rain all at once.The pigs scattered to the warmth of their sty, and all the hens disappeared within seconds. Kate Winslett darted for the cover of her small broody coop with the chicks desperately in tow as it lashed down and the brook on the far side of the field burst its banks for a short period as the run off from the fields channelled through the mud filled ditch
I hurried over to the ditch to check on the ducks who have just recently gotten into the habit of bathing in the shallow water, only to find one lone female stranded in the swirling water! inches from the dump drain. She looked frightened and tired and was caught up in mud,and tree branches that had been washed down the stream by the floodwater.

I clambered down the narrow bank (with water tipping merrily over into my wellies) and somehow grabbed her by one wing just as the poor girl disappeared under the water! I couldn't quite believe that by a fluke of fate I was in the right place at the right time to save her.........

Prestatyn

I know I big up Trelawnyd all of the time but I still have an awful lot of affection for Prestatyn, the town where I was born and bred (Until I left aged 18)
Prestatyn is 2 miles from our village.......and it was nice to find this positive video about it on u tube....
I would love to find something similar for my "other" favourite home town of Hillsborough in Sheffield...

Manchester

Off to Manchester today......art house film (at the corner house near Oxford Road), a few wines and lots of chat is the order of the day with old friend Nige....a simple but very welcomed night out.....great stuff!

Flower show entries and animal ties

This afternoon I have organised some of my entries for my sister's Flower Show, which opens on Friday morning. It is a little too early to be cutting vegetables but as I am off to Manchester to see Nige tomorrow, it is the only time I can prepare things.

Halleh (Centre with Rogo watching on)

I have written before about how some of the animals constantly seem to have the ability to amaze and move me; and today I witnessed another little "gem" of an interaction.

Halleh now has been officially abandoned by his adoptive mother Blanche which is pretty normal behaviour for a broody hen. For days he has been following the dog attack survivor flock which is led by the red cockerel Rogo, in an effort to obtain security and company, and today I realised just how effective his stalking behaviour has been.

I made some rice for Chris' tea this afternoon and took the leftovers over to the field .As I called the hens to come forward, Halleh as usual joined in with the rush for food but unfortunately got one of his feet trapped in the fencing. He panicked, as ducks have a want to do, and fell flat on his face calling out with a loud hysterical call . Immediately Rogo was at his side dancing in a typical male defence pose, and I had to drive the cockerel off before I could free Halleh from the fence. It would now seem that the duck is firmly part of Rogo's small flock

This evening we are holding the last of the Trelawnyd Flower Show committee meetings before the big day in August There seems a great deal to do but generally I think that most things are in hand. I am also pleased that we received an official invite for two members of the committee to attend the grand opening of the newly refurbished memorial hall on the 18th of September. I think it was a nice gesture that we were included in the celebrations and I am sure it is a reflection of how much the Flower Show has supported the Memorial hall with sizable donations over many years.

After discussion the committee agreed that Carol Royles and I would be attending, which is fun