I’ve heard it said, that people come into your life…..for a reason
Bringing something we must learn……..
I have lost two old friends recently.
One hasn’t been a part of my present life the moment we left for Wales in 2005.
The other stood next to me in choir and ballsed up many a song.
I had respect and affection for them both
David was a charge nurse on the spinal injury unit in Sheffield. He was shy, intelligent, taciturn and patient focused.
We were not friends, for I always thought that he didn’t know how to take my humour , but we were colleagues and I’d like to think that he respected me as much as I did him
Peter was a local counsellor who enjoyed being on a committee. Elderly and carefully spoken , I always sought him out in choir where he was kind, and friendly and where he could always be trusted to get the more difficult bits wrong.
Two men , not my friends
But two men, I think fondly about.
Thinking fondly about someone is such an importance
And we are led…to those who help us most to grow
I'm sorry for your loss, John. People touch our lives, sometimes fleetingly, but they leave their mark. The best are those who make us smile when we think of them. xx
ReplyDeleteIt's sad to lose people even when we're not close to them.
ReplyDeleteA lovely remembrance. We need all sorts in our lives.
ReplyDeleteA tender remembrance, John. There are many people you may not be close to who nevertheless leave a mark on your psyche. Concentric circles may touch briefly, then move away. And sometimes that is the secret of the connection. I am so sorry for your loss - why do these things always happen in clusters? - but everyone has been a part of who you became. No man is an island.
ReplyDeleteYorkshire Liz's comment above is so kind and well written. I'm sorry for your loss.
ReplyDeleteAlways a reminder of how important we are to others and how fleeting our time is here.
ReplyDeleteMy sympathy in the loss of these two caring and intelligent men who made an impression on you as you likely made on each of them. "Friends of the road or friends of the heart" both matter as we live our days as best we can.
ReplyDeleteHugs, my friend.
You likely made an impression on them too, so sorry for your loss. Gigi
ReplyDeleteI could count my friends on one hand which is why I cherish them. So sorry for your loss.
ReplyDeleteTake time and take care of yourself.
ReplyDeleteAnd you still have many friends, in the village, throughout the island, and here on the World Wide Web!
ReplyDeleteI find, people move in and out of our lives constantly. Everybody leaves their mark on our lives, one way or another.
ReplyDeleteYou speak fondly of these two individuals and I'm sorry for your loss.
It's hard to lose even people you haven't been in touch with. Just knowing they're there somewhere counts. And you too will have had an effect on people, even ones you've met in passing.
ReplyDeleteI have found this very true on many occasions. Some are Teachers and come into your life for this reason and stay only for a season. At another time they are the ones learning. Some come into our lives just to generally help and keep us on an even keel. I believe it is a dual role that can affect any one of us through our lives i.e. the Learners or the Teachers.. The verse struck a chord with me many years ago and helped me deal with situations where I thought I had offended when indeed I had not. Bit of a Worry Wort here taking responsibility for things that are not sometimes of my doing. Most of the time these Travellers they help when they are needed and then move on gracefully with their lives. They are on a different path but learning too. It is a natural thing. It is a beautiful verse to live by and I find it very comforting. Losing people is very difficult at the best of times, but knowing that their goodness and their souls have touched yours for a brief amount of time is reward enough. Pure Gentle Souls. Hugs Pattypanxx
ReplyDeleteDid both men die?
ReplyDeleteGrief doesn't seem to care how we feel about others, stranger, or lover, friends or aquaintances, it all hurts.
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ReplyDeleteI am sorry for your loss. It is a sobering thing, isn't it?
ReplyDeleteTrue that we can feel so much for someone who we are fond of but not close friends with. They all do touch our lives and bring something to us. Makes me think of a sentiment in the film "The Life of Chuck" - that we are all multitudes.
ReplyDeleteLosing someone you know brings one up short, suddenly even though you were not in touch; now it's too late. I have regrets about not making an effort even though to be honest they didn't either. Processing those feelings are tricky for me. That said, I'm sorry for your loss.
ReplyDeleteFarewell David and Peter. I hope you had more good than bad times in this land of the living. Perhaps you will meet up in heaven and enjoy a pint together in "St Peter's Arms" or "The Angel's Wings", gossiping about your mutual acquaintance - The Rascal of Trelawnyd who will be joining you in a few years... maybe twenty if he is lucky.
ReplyDeleteMoving countries meant leaving sixty+ years of relationships behind. This post has made me focus on that loss of community and I realize I have been in mourning for that loss of connection that was so important in my life. Making new friends in a new culture has been a slow process. Heading into my third holiday season here I have
ReplyDeleterecently felt lighter and more grounded in my new home. Losing people is hard…even if they are still alive.
weavinfool
You have been changed… for good. ❤️
ReplyDeleteMy Hubs says people come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. There are many of each of those kinds of people in my life. My work in therapy has given me the gift of clarity - that I cannot make all people my lifetime people, and I don't need to feel shitty or guilty about that. Rest in eternal peace, David and Peter, and hugs to you John for appreciating their impact on your life.
ReplyDeleteI think of the bloggers I read as friends, too.
ReplyDeleteLife is all love and loss.
ReplyDeleteA tip regardng Weaver shitting on your bed - if you have 2 cats you need 2 litter trays. We've had many cats over the years and not only do you need to empty and clean the trays regularly (something you've said you don't always do) but they prefer to have a tray each.
So sorry for your loss. People come into out lives in all sorts of ways and at all sorts of different times, what we learn from others can help shape us in ways we sometimes don't even realise, and what we give of ourselves to others also helps shape them.
ReplyDelete'our lives'.
DeleteThanks, John. You're totally right and I appreciate what you say. Somehow I have lost six friends and colleagues over the last few months, and I really miss them. It's making me hold other friends close, but it's tough. Thinking of you and hugs, Jxx
ReplyDelete