I can’t seem to settle at anything at the moment. The deadline for voluntary redundancies is four days away and so my colleagues and I have to live with the uncertainty until then and beyond.
I’m not sleeping well and I don’t feel like writing the blog
I feel lethargic and out of sorts .
Of course things divert me for a while The Gilded Age has proved a slow burn of a watch with Bertha Russell’s social climb in 1890s New York and the sudden arrival of the dishy English Duke Hector ( Ben Lamb)
I may omit posts these next few days…until I know what my employment fate it
Hey ho
Thinking of you John and hope things work out right for you. x
ReplyDeleteWendy (Wales)
Thank you Wendy xxx
DeleteJohn, waiting is the worst! I’m so sorry you’re being dragged through this. I will miss you if you aren’t up to writing, but I want you to do what is best for you. You are loved by so many. Don’t forget that. Sending love and hugs, Carol in Atl❤️
ReplyDeleteIt’s lovely to be loved and I truly thank you for that x but I have bills to pay
DeleteStress means not thinking easily...so no blogging is understandable.
ReplyDeleteVirtual ((Hugs)) sent x
It’s the sleep which is an issue, I’ve never not slept before
DeleteI put the radio on low...so when I wake there is something there to fill the void. Ironically when it gets interesting I tend to go to sleep....
DeleteThank u x
DeleteThis is a tough time. If you need time off from blogging we'll be here when you get back.
ReplyDeleteI’ll blog when I get the urge xxx
DeleteTake all the time you need, John. I know this is worrisome but no matter what, you will adapt. You have valuable skills and the world needs you!
ReplyDeleteAnd you my friend ..I’m still so sorry about olga
DeleteAww babes!
ReplyDeleteSending e-hugs.
XOXO
I need them my friend
DeleteUncertainty is very stressful. No wonder you can't think straight. I, like most of your readers, am hoping all will be well for you and your colleagues. Take a hug from me. xx
ReplyDeleteTaken with much thanks
DeleteNot easy but be gentle on yourself - enjoy the furries, coffee, the sun, good food and breathe🙏. Hope all settles soon. Jan in Castle Gresley
ReplyDeleteI’m taking financial advice too xx
DeleteSending hugs to you and your colleagues. Good luck John x Bernie
ReplyDeleteGood luck for us all
DeleteSo very sorry that the jobs of you and many of your co-workers are up in the air.
ReplyDeleteWishing you peace of heart and good sleep in these uncertain times. We'll be here.
Big hugs (even if I'm not so big!)
7.5 full time nurses will be going
DeleteThe uncertainty is not good for stress levels. I hope you find a way to achieve some peace and comfort through it all.
ReplyDeleteI’ve never been in such financial terror before , except when the prof left, I hate the lack of control
DeleteHugs to you, John. Waiting for the shoe to drop is the WORST.
ReplyDeleteI know dearHeart x
DeleteNice to see Dame Hilda Bracket back on the telly….
ReplyDeleteAnd meryl streeps daughter
DeleteI hope someone nearby can give you a big hug from us all.
ReplyDeleteWaiting is stressful and you need to find time to do something that helps you. Josie ( ) that's a hug.
The message u sent did that
DeleteYou know that we are thinking of you, and wishing it all OK.
ReplyDeleteI know that and I’m grateful
DeleteDo what you need to do to take care of yourself John, we'll all be here when you return. Stout heart!
ReplyDeleteIt doesn’t feel that stout 🩷
DeleteTits up!
ReplyDeleteSending hugs!
Yes. I’m tugging hard on those bra straps 👙
DeleteHugs to you and head scritches to sweet Mary, dear Roger, beautiful Bun, and warrior Weaver.
ReplyDeleteHoping the recent storm caused no problems at the cottage, your arm is improving, and your brother-in-law is doing well.
No damage ….brother in law is home and doing well, my arm is improved xxxxx yes I should be more grateful thank you for the lesson x
DeleteWe will be here when you come back! Waiting is so hard....
ReplyDeleteThat’s reassuring x thank u
DeleteBeing in limbo is debilitating, physically and emotionally. A terrible state to endure. We are all out here waiting with you. Hugs. Kris in Ohio
ReplyDeleteKris big hugs🙏🩷
DeleteWe understand if you don't feel like posting and will wait until you are back. Take care of yourself x
ReplyDeleteThanks Sue x
DeleteBeen there, been just how you are feeling. It is horrible; you can't think forward, you can't plan anything, you are hoping for the best but expecting the worst. Do not apologise for not feeling like blogging - because anything and everything you say feels like tempting Fate, whichever way it goes.
ReplyDeleteWe are always here, rooting for you through the silence, the good times and bad. I only wish I was nearer to offer hugs, casseroles, dog treats and flowers. Take them as read, though. Good luck and God bless.
A kind post read and accepted with gratitude xxx
DeleteSorry to hear you are struggling with the position at work, it is horrible to have the uncertainty hanging over you.
ReplyDeleteWill miss your posts but understand how it is hard for you .
Jane
I will post if I’m up to it, I just wanted to warm you if I don’t x
DeleteRest, and rest easy, JG.
ReplyDeleteI m trying
DeleteI hope you can de-stress a bit while you wait.
ReplyDeleteAnd through it all, the nurses ( and only the nurses)are being chosen to go, yet we have to perform with patients as if nothing is happening…and doing so with professionalism
DeleteIt is an appalling position to be placed in.
DeleteHugs
DeleteA note from The Upper East Side NYC
ReplyDeleteSquire Gray
You have pulled your bra straps up before,
first when your beloved Prof left you got and you got through things with no money, no car, and a poorly George doggie as I remember.
You got through that
You will get through this
So titties up
Up
Up
And I love ya!
Leex
And that message lifted me too, you potty mouthed New Yorker x
DeleteTake all the time you need, John. We'll be here when you get back. xx
ReplyDeleteThank you dearHeart
DeleteThis can't be fun. I stand with everyone else here, sending support and hugs. XO
ReplyDeleteThank u
DeleteHugs from afar!
ReplyDeleteI know David xxx
DeleteI've been through it before. The angst and sense.of.doom is unbearable.and you fear life.will never be the.same. But slowly you find.a way and life.becomes normal.again. Wishing you the best. Linda.from PA
ReplyDeleteAnother baseball from left field
DeleteKeeping my fingers crossed for you, John. xx
ReplyDeleteThank you dearHeart
DeleteOh blimey , it’s hard for us waiting to hear, it must be ten times worse for you. Thinking of you and hoping it is a good outcome for you x
ReplyDelete🩷🩷
DeleteIci on dit menton en l'air, droit devant ,un terme de cavalier Amities et courage de France Paule Caillou
ReplyDeletePaule Caillou, tu es une personne adorable qui m'a bien soutenu
DeleteTake care of yourself, John. Hoping things work out for the best for you. xo
ReplyDeleteFingers crossed
DeleteYou are never far from my thoughts during this hugely stressful time xx
ReplyDeleteThank u Kath xxx
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteThere is many unemployed counsellors locally
DeleteSorry, tried to edit and managed to delete.
ReplyDeleteMy original comment was-
When you are ready, I wonder if you might consider remote counselling. My son's counsellor conducts on- screen sessions, working from home. I'm sure you'd have a great take-up xx
Do the unemployed counsellors rely on having premises, or can they work remotely?
No need to delete my friend xxx
DeleteI believe your job is safe bec you always do nights, weekends, holidays, plus it's good to have a male nurse there. Add in your years of experience and so thoughtful care for your patients--I think you will be fine. But I understand the sleepless nights. PS online therapist idea sounds good. worth a try!
ReplyDeletehugs from lizzy x
We will see
DeleteFingers crossed, prayers said hoping for the best!
ReplyDeleteYes
DeleteMy thoughts are with you John. Waiting for management decisions is never easy.
ReplyDeleteWhen you get through this, it would be good to establish an emergency fund for times like this. Jobs in all sectors (except AI) are at risk today.
Let’s hope x
DeleteHave read your blog for so long that I care about you -- and have certainly been in your situation (it's awful). Holding good thoughts and crossing every finger I can for you. Mary
ReplyDeleteDearHeart xx
DeleteWishing all the best. We will be here when you come back. Take your time, xx
ReplyDeleteThank you Jackie x
DeleteI have just started watching The Gilded Age (I've not caught up to you b/c I have no idea who that man is). I am wildly addicted. I am hoping the next 4 days pass quickly. I can only echo everyone else's wishes for a good outcome. ♥
ReplyDeleteIt’s a slow burn for sure
DeleteI've picked up on the stress in your posting over the last week or so and this morning felt very sad for you before I even read today's post. I've been through the cutbacks, went from full time to a smidge over half time. I had quite a long drive to work and petrol costs were significant. "They" thought they would schedule me for 5 half day shifts so I still had to drive in five times a week and pay the petrol bills on half my salary. I just looked at them as if they had gone mad, pointed out the unfairness, and on that at least they gave in. Does seniorority/years worked come in to play? I feel we are just numbers on a page and whether we are great nurses rather than just adequate doesn't count at all. Hang in there.
ReplyDeleteI feel I’m repeating the stress posts of 2018 when Chris left me ..
DeleteSorry you are still at the waiting bit, it seems endless doesn't it. I echo the sentiments of everyone who rightly points out that you are an experienced senior nurse who often takes on the shitty shifts to allow others to take the nicer ones. I've been reading your blog so long I feel like I've been through it with you, and now is no different. My fingers and toes are crossed that you will receive good news and that the serendipity that has shown itself up in your life does so again. Hugs for you ....I was going to toast you when you got your certification but I'm holding off till you get good news. Chin up just so you know I am wishing you all good luck.
ReplyDelete🩷🩷🩷
DeleteHang in there….trite I know! Sending positive vibes for all to be well. Kathy
ReplyDelete🩷🩷🩷🩷
DeleteUgh. Uncertainty is a nightmare. Thinking of you and sending ahug. We're all waiting with you.
ReplyDeleteI will let u all know as soon as I do
DeleteWhat an awful time, waiting for news which can completely change lives so much. Not surprised you don't feel like blogging at the moment. Hoping for the best outcome and thinking of you.
ReplyDelete🩷🙏🌈
DeleteThinking of you John , and hope all goes well , living in Limbo must be so tough . Just look after yourself, only blog when you feel ready . Good luck xx
ReplyDeleteI feel awful
DeleteIt's all been said really but I add my hugs and am keeping my fingers crossed for you.
ReplyDeleteAnd I will repeat
DeleteThank u
Cutting 7.5 nurses from only one hospice? How can that be?
ReplyDeleteJust like all your followers I’m biting my nails along with you and sending my good vibes and hugs for a positive outcome for you. I’m also sad for your colleagues who are in the same quagmire of uncertainty.
weavinfool
It’s the way of the world
DeleteThinking of you dear John and sending you strength for whatever lies ahead. X
ReplyDeleteThank ux
DeleteDear John, of course you're feeling unsettled and anxious. It's a horrible experience and there's so little we can do to take your pain and fears away. But we're here, we're caring, and hoping. As so many of your neighbours are. May your furry family comfort you. 🙏🏻 and hugs. XX
ReplyDeleteVirginia
Virginia , tonight I’m watching AND JUST LIKE THAT with my dogs xx
DeleteUncertainty is the worst thing, wishing you comfort and a good outcome xx
ReplyDeleteUncertainty is killing me
DeleteThe unknown is always stressful because you can't make plans. Your colleagues must feel the same. I hope it pans out the way you wish.
ReplyDeleteI know some lovely people at work, lovely lovely people
Deletewww.baysideradio.co.uk
ReplyDeleteJuly 14, 2025 - 448 views
St David’s Hospice has today confirmed with a heavy heart the temporary closure of its four Holyhead in-patient beds from October 2025. Services at its Llandudno and Bangor sites will continue.
Sadly, this means a number of clinical and non-clinical positions are at risk at St David’s Hospice and a full consultation is now underway. Staff wellbeing is of utmost priority, and the Hospice is providing support to staff during this difficult time.
All patients and families currently receiving care from the Holyhead hospice are being informed and will instead have access to St David’s Llandudno and Bangor sites — where they will continue to receive the highest standard of care that St David’s Hospice provides.
This difficult strategic decision has been made due to a number of factors, during a challenging time for the charity and care sectors in the UK. The combination of rising running costs and reduced income have made it economically unviable to continue operating all three hospice sites — despite St David’s Hospice’s best efforts to mitigate these factors.
The temporary closure of the Holyhead in-patient beds will, however, allow St David’s Hospice to focus on strengthening its operations — helping to deliver on the Hospice’s mission to ensure that the people of Anglesey, Conwy and Gwynedd receive the end of life care they deserve.
The temporary closure of the Holyhead facility will be reviewed in 12 months.
In the meantime, services at Llandudno and Bangor hospices will continue, allowing St David’s Hospice to maintain its vital work in providing sustainable, high-quality palliative care to the people of north Wales, long into the future.
As a charity, St David’s Hospice relies on income from Welsh Government, the Local Health Board, fundraising, donations and local hospice charity shops to cover the costs of its care provisions. If you would like to find out more about how you can support St David’s Hospice or to make a donation, please visit: Donate - St David's Hospice
See also
What the article doesn’t make clear is that staff at both sites are at risk of redundancy.
DeleteI am not sure how it works there, but in my country, shutdowns mean that jobs will be shuffled. Someone from a facility closing has the ability to 'bump' other jobs at other facilities. Once people that dust settles. Management has the 'opportunity' to eliminate jobs at facilities not being closed.
DeleteIt's completely understandable to be out of sorts at the moment, and blogging while feeling like that is extremely hard to do. Waiting for any news or information can be awful especially when it has the potential to be bad. But look at how well you've coped in the past, and while you wait keep trying all sorts of different distractions, especially things that will physically and mentally tire you out, perhaps then some sleep will return.
ReplyDeleteA beta blocker helps
DeleteHoping for the best for you, John. Gigi
ReplyDeleteI know you do
Deletewishing you the best outcome on the job front and yes, isn't that The Gilded Age livening up a bit since the Duke arrived!
ReplyDeleteHis sister is a cow
DeleteIt sucks. No two ways about it. Sending thoughts of support to you and your fellow nurses--the very heart of any hospice. Hoping you will retain your job, in particular, because you are the very best, John. xx
ReplyDeleteThank you dearHeart
DeleteAlso holding you in my thoughts from afar, Olivia
ReplyDeleteThank you Olivia x
DeleteThinking of you and hoping for the best. Hang in there … things will work out! Cali
ReplyDelete🙏🫰🏻
DeleteHugs and love John. Wish I could do more.
ReplyDeleteYou already have
DeleteYou had given the impression that you would become a paid counsellor and give up the hospice job. What's changed? Perhaps you've realised your lifestyle and your prospective earnings don't match up? Add up your leisure spending over a year including impulse buys and you'll have a shock.
ReplyDeleteNo, I always said the transition was a gradual one
DeleteBut you wouldn’t see that or would want to see that my friend
Anonymous. Yes. You hide and you accuse. Go take a hike!
ReplyDeleteWe love you, John. Anon is jealous. Sure hope your past luck comes through again! We are here with you and for you...
No worries runnrose, ,she’s obviously not well
DeleteI agree she is not well. Isn't it strange how word patterns can be a clue who "she" is? Please enjoy your break John.
ReplyDeleteWorry/anxiety is a beast. There's no way out but through, one minute at a time. I'm thinking of you. xx
ReplyDelete