Who was your favourite patient ?
It was a question a more junior nurse asked me a few days ago. She punctuated the question with the word ever!
Thus making the answer all rather difficult.
Forty one years of patients
You’d think they would merge into one.
They don’t!
Former medic Should Fish More will, I think agree with me here
Certain patients will capture your heart, head, humour , conscience, memory and psychi for all different reasons, and will remain close by like memories of a lovely holiday or a particularly sad family funeral.
Favourite isn’t the right word to use here, it can’t be.
A chic Italian interpreter who wanted to dance with me before she died ( we danced)
A lost, and handsome North Yorkshire man, shaken by mental illness wanting to hold my hand when he saw me out shopping in central York in 1987
An Iraqi boy of eleven, paralysed in the war careering around the spinal unit, cackling like a loon, with my first dog Finlay tied to the front of his wheelchair.
Indumati, a bad tempered, irascible Hindu lady who could hit me with a piece of fruit at ten feet even though she was blind as a bat.
Being the birthing partner of a Sheffield teenager giving birth to her first baby who she called Harley Davidson
The wife of a man with a lacerated liver who begged me to save his life as he bled to death.
The jovial schizophrenic lady to annoyed the pious chaplain of Chester’s Deva hospital by peeing on the chapel’s floor during Church service.
And the Welsh farmer’s wife who gave me a pair of Turkey poults after I had looked after her on intensive care.
I could go on….. I’m on a roll.
Any writer stuck for character ideas, ask a nurse. I hope Indumati's fruit was ripe - leaving a stain rather than a bruise.
ReplyDeleteShe was a vegetarian and used to yell “ you dirty man you smell of pig ! “ at me
DeleteWhatever the career, we all have our memorable ones.....the lady celebrating her 100th birthday who put her long life down to eating a rice pudding every day. The diamond wedding couple who threw a bucket of water over me to send me away because they thought they had to pay to have their anniversary in the paper. The Hollywood star who had us both laughing so much through a lunch interview I didn't take a single note yet remembered every word. The TV favourite who proved the most obnoxious man I have ever interviewed. The memories you spark, John!
ReplyDeleteWho was the star
DeleteDo tell
Just give us a clue!
DeleteWas it Captain Pugwash?
DeleteSorry, a good journalist never reveals her sources. And if I did he'd probably come back and kill me, as cheerful good nature never has been his image. I only wish it was Captain Pugwash, Yorkshire Pudding, I was always fond of the fat old idiot.
DeleteIntriguing !!!!!
DeleteI agree, favourite isn't the word. Memorable is a better word. I'm sure many of your patients remember you with varying degrees of affection, humour and possibly irritation! The main thing is, your lives touched, briefly and left their mark. Humanity in action. xx
ReplyDeletePossible irritation? How very dare u lol x
DeleteWell, we all rub people up the wrong way at times and I suspect the possibility of doing so with psychiatric patients is greater than most. xx
DeleteIndeed we do xx
DeleteThere are children I remember from decades past and wonder about. Occasionally, I am lucky enough to catch up with them.
ReplyDeleteOne of my sister's students went on to be a famous Aussie Rules footballer and in our company she ran into him in a lift. They ignored each other. She later said he was only student she really hated. I expect the memories of teachers as against the memories of students don't match. They will remember certain teachers but the teachers will remember different students.
DeleteWell you can’t like everyone xxx
DeleteJohn, I did a job that benefitted people greatly and of course I was paid for it. I had to remind myself at times that I was doing the public a good service. I hope you remember the same about your working life. You must have cared for hundreds of people. Paid? Yes. Done well, it seems very much so.
ReplyDeleteI’ve met a great many people at their lowest ebb, and been totally blown away by their abilities to cope and dire adversity .
DeleteI’ve also met a great many shits
Definitely memorable. You can't have favourites.
ReplyDeleteMy mother did
DeleteIt's a bit like someone asking 'Which is your favourite child?'.
ReplyDeleteLike I said, my mother could answer that one
DeleteCro, my dearest man, would you have any pull to get someone to read John's blog to make a BBC series out of it? No need to answer. Just thinking aloud.
DeleteIncredible memories and stories and I'm not surprised you were put off by the word “favorite.”
ReplyDeleteThe sad ones can’t be favourites x
DeleteI enjoy reading about them all, so I hope that you have many more "favourites" to share with us.
ReplyDeleteOh you know me, gob shite x
DeleteThat's what comes of working with people John. Lovely pen pictures you paint. I could do the same with children I have known. You have given me an idea for a post. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteI look forward to your post pat, very
DeleteGervase Phinn
Dr Gervase Phinn is a teacher, freelance lecturer, author, poet, educational consultant and visiting professor of education. For fourteen years he taught in a range of schools, then acted as General Adviser for Language Development in Rotherham before moving on to North Yorkshire, where he spent ten years as a school inspector - time that has provided much source material for his books. He has four grown up children and four grandchildren and lives near Doncaster. Visit Gervase's website, www.gervase-phinn.com .
Hope it's not out of place to wonder - but did anyone give you the glad eye x
ReplyDeleteNever lol
DeleteI remember reading your story about the lady who peed on the chapel floor.
ReplyDeleteHer name was Phylis
Deletehttps://disasterfilm.blogspot.com/2011/11/phyllis-leek-remembered.html
A lifetime of experiences, and the basis for a great book when you make time to write it.
ReplyDeleteI wish I had the talent x
DeleteBut you do have the talent you idiot…write the bloody book. You have demonstrated the talent through this blog.
DeleteI loved reading this. Jean
ReplyDeleteI did too Jean
DeleteI want to know more though.
Keith,
Xx
I’ve posted about most before keith , see responses
DeleteWhat a delightful post, John! I, too have too many memorable patients to count. Gone, but not forgotten.
ReplyDeleteHappy Monday!
Hugs!
And several sad ones too , par for course x
DeleteThe patient with ALS, with a POW tattoo on her forearm, also diagnosed with breast cancer; the multip with a frank breech birth; the old nurse who called on rank as she denied her diagnosis; the boyfriend of the patient with a head injury, the result of a boating accident; the young boy with chickenpox who said his skin felt like a dill pickle; the older sibling who said, "We're rich," at the birth of his little sister. I could go on & on. Yes, memorable more than favorite.
ReplyDeleteNow those sounded worth reading about
Delete“ we’re rich” had me emotional
Please, do go on. Very interesting.
ReplyDeleteSee my links in the comments
DeleteSuch a great post, John. Thanks!
ReplyDeleteIt was nice to remember
DeleteMaybe the question should be your most MEMORABLE patient, though that, too, may be difficult to answer.
ReplyDeleteYes, the liver patient was so memorable because of the intensity of his wife .
DeleteIt was the only time in my whole career that I felt totally overwhelmed , thank god for two quiet Filipino nurses who jumped silently in to help me .
They saved me that day
You have certainly found your calling. A life well lived.
ReplyDeleteOr just well remembered
DeleteWe had some very memorable customers in our stores, including a murderer! He did 25 years in prison and then was released, and was seen in our neighbourhood. Gladi I have never run into him but we both probably look very different now.. oh I forgot another customer [with mental issues, murdered his Mother one day] We had some doozies and every day was interesting. Gigi
ReplyDeleteI’ve nursed prisoners but never a murderer!!!
DeleteJohn
ReplyDeleteYes, a near impossible task. It's now been well over a decade since my last patient, and memory is starting to either slip or blend into a composit.
I remember some, comical and tragic both. Watching a famous scientist and author succumb to an unsuccessful bone marrow transplant while he tried to keep my spirits up, the author of a popular book react when I said I hadn't read his book, that 'I usually only read literature'. They go on and on.
I’d like to hear your stories
DeleteThe ways in which we can affect people's lives can show how the way we treat someone matters When I was moving out of state a patron of a place I worked at handed me an envelope with a lot of money in it and said" I don't know why I have always been so good to you,what did you ever do for me?"
ReplyDeleteSpeaking quietly so only he would hear me I told him what we both knew was the truth - I said
"I never came on to you,
you would have willingly had an affair with me or left your wife if I wanted you to . I spared you from
making a huge mistake that we both knew would ruin your life " He kissed my forehead and left....
Mary
What a lovely story
DeleteMuch more interesting than mine mary x
Now, that made me laugh!
ReplyDeleteMany years ago I briefly worked in a dietary department in a hospital which also had a few permanent patients. An elderly man that was paralyzed was always fun to talk to and I enjoyed his good humor. I was taking his lunch preference one day as a young female nurse with a very large bosom was straightening his bed covers. He was clearly distracted and tore his eyes away from her chest and looked at me with a twinkle in his eye and said "all that and not a thing I can do about it!" Great post John! Jackie
ReplyDeleteAh the benny hill twinkle
DeleteI remember it well
Patient comes from the Latin “patiens,” from “patior,” to suffer or bear. The patient, in this language, is truly passive—bearing whatever suffering is necessary and tolerating patiently the interventions of the outside expert.
ReplyDeleteMost of the stories are here
ReplyDeletehttps://disasterfilm.blogspot.com/2011/11/phyllis-leek-remembered.html
https://disasterfilm.blogspot.com/2011/03/hatim.html
https://disasterfilm.blogspot.com/2020/09/indumathi-indu-hindu.html
ReplyDeletehttps://disasterfilm.blogspot.com/2021/07/ally-mcbeal.html
I;doubt that, you just don’t remember them
ReplyDeleteWorking in a rest home in a hospital wing the clinical manager asked me to work with an elderly gentleman who terrified the younger support workers as he was very handy with his hands, she knew I would be able to handle him. I went along, introduced myself and began to make his bed. He was sitting in the chair next to the bed; I felt his hands begin to creep up my leg under my uniform I turned my head and said to him quietly ''any higher love and I will knock your head into next week". He rapidly removed his hand and I finished the bed and left. The clinical manager the next time I was on shift said to me "I knew you would sort him out he's an angel now". Thing is I would never have touched him but I knew the threat would do it.
ReplyDeleteJo in Auckland
Ah the good old days lol
DeleteThanks for information.
ReplyDeleteA great blog entry and brilliant comments.
ReplyDeleteLooking forward to Weaver’s post on her pupils.
Yes I suspect that will be emotional
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteFavorite is an odd word. Some of my most memorable meetings were with people that I didn't especially like, but in the end, they left a mark, an indelible memory. We are, all of us, able to make and leave marks. I try my hardest to leave a good one. I know that I have not done so. I like your stories. I wonder how many times these people are remembered by anyone else but you.
ReplyDeleteNot my word but the questioners ,
DeleteSome of the examples I gave , were not “ popular”
Oh I wasn't disparaging anyone for the use of the world. It just gave me something to think on for the day, and it was just a personal observation that surprised me.
Delete*word
DeleteI was a Reading Recovery teacher for over 20 years, and the children I remember most clearly I wouldn't call 'favourites', but those I had most respect for .... was in awe of .... moved me most deeply ... were those who had to work the hardest, who had to be so courageous to overcome their difficulties. I'll only recount one child's story. At one year of age, she had been in a child restraint in her mother's car when hit by a truck. She came to school needing callipers to walk, a special chair to keep her upright, full time Teacher Aid (TA) assistance. She couldn't speak in full sentences and had very poor motor coordination. When she turned 6 I said I wanted to try Reading Recovery. The Principal agreed to a 6 week trial, and I negotiated 10 weeks! The first weeks were a huge learning curve as I adapted books and experiences for her. But, slowly, miraculously, I saw progress. As she started to read, she learnt to control full sentences, and every day, her fantastic TA repeated much of my lesson with her. By the end of 20 weeks, she was reading above the average for her age, and speaking confidently in full sentences. It was as close to a miracle as I've ever seen. Her writing wasn't where "the average child's" was, because her fine motor control was still poor, but I still get quite overwhelmed by what that gorgeous girl achieved.
ReplyDeleteAn example of going gently at its best
DeleteThe comments outweigh the post
Bloody lovely
All very good, but I'm still laughing over the Hindu lady and her ability to hit you from 10 ft away, was she related to a Dolphin with excellent echo location? :)
ReplyDeleteShe was known a “ Indu the hindu” terribly racist now but a nickname enjoyed by her. Which she would roar with laughter about. She was incredibly over weight too, but dressed beautifully in blue saris
DeleteSuch intense and varied experiences of life! I have even more respect for any doctor, nurse or carer than before.
ReplyDeleteSome lovely memories there John. I'm sure you are as imprinted on them as they are on you. I should imagine the little Iraqi boy, now a man, still remembers his wheelchair chariot ride and the special dog that accompanied him.
ReplyDeleteAs Yorkshire Liz says so many careers leave us with special and detailed memories of people and events. The volunteer stories I could tell from my charity shop managing days ... charity shop volunteers are a brilliant and varied bunch.