Catch Up

Chic Eleanor nodded and sipped her gin 

I told her I had stalked my ex husbands’s wedding on social media last weekend 

And she smiled 

I think we all would have done that she said kindly 

And I think she was right 

So how did it feel ? She asked carefully

And do you know that it felt ok I told her

I saw an in law family I once loved posing the same poses they did at my own wedding

And I saw my ex husband looking older and heavier and balder  and happy as he danced with his husband 

And in that very moment I let him go

After a long five years, I let him go …….

Eleanor listened to my words and smiled her benign smile again 

And she reached forward and held my hands firmly on the table top

As we sat silently in the chatter of the pub, 

Holding hands 

And the tears that followed were the relief