The Significance of touch

 Once, many moons ago now, I embarked on a short weekend retreat course in the Lake District.

I remember little about the event save for a few vague memories of group exercises which had more significance then than they could possibly have now, but most had to do with trust issues, self awareness, sharing , personal development and motivation. 

One I do remember though and that was an exercise that I think was called Walking The Hedge.

The “ hedge” as it turned out was made up of two lines of the group, an eclectic bunch of individuals made up of psychiatrists, psychotherapists, Occupational therapists, nurses and social workers.

The two lines faced each other and one by one volunteers from the group would be blindfolded and walked slowly down the line. The hedge would gently touch the volunteer ( I’m sure we were told to do so appropriately but with sensitivity) and at any one time the volunteer could be overwhelmed by hands which were described by the French leader as a “ Shower Of Cuddles” “ showerrr of cudd…elles”

I remember feeling dreadfully sceptical and somewhat threatened by the exercise but I participated reminding myself to place my had in non sexually ambiguous places.

It was a strange, incredibly powerful exercise for some

I remember one serious young medic who always seemed isolated from the group suddenly react to the touch “wave” with intense emotion and the more moved he became the more the hands of the hedge seemed to encircle and support him as the French leader slowed the pace of his walk.

It was incredibly moving to watch.

This happened several times with different group members.  

And not surprisingly I was not of them, as I had opted out of the Hedge Walk.

Which perhaps says a great deal about me at the time.

On a different level, I remember getting a gift from a patient from intensive care , who I looked after the day we woke her up from an induced coma. I washed her after she was extubated  and she confided in me later that it was the first time anyone had physically touched her for 17 years. 

The gift, surprisingly was two baby turkeys.

I touch people everyday at work. Even with covid at its highest I would hold hands and mop brows, and put my arm around a relative whose knees had started to buckle in grief.

Now that I’m older, I’ve become a serious hugger

I hugged Gorgeous Dave only yesterday when I bid him goodbye 

I think men are much better huggers than they ever used to be.

I wondered about the Hedge Walk and thought, today how wonderful it would be to walk the walk “ again”