Fat Balls

 


I’ve only just realised that I’ve grown a full beard .
I’ve had it tucked away beneath my mask for so long, I’ve got out of the habit of looking at my face.
I FaceTimed a Sheffield friend last night and noticed it...
I look like a pirate
Dorothy ate several bird fat balls at Trendy Carol’s the day before yesterday so has been suffering from explosive shits for the last day or so which has been lovely.
In between bouts of mopping I’ve been reading The Fine Art of Invisible Detection by Robert Goddard in the bedroom window seat
The ash trees in the corner of the Church Yard are not doing well, I’ve noticed 


67 comments:

  1. I hope you don't mind me saying John but in those stylish specs sitting in your armchair and your description of your recent times Alan Bennett came into my mind x

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  2. John I think you look very handsome!

    About the ash trees.... I hope your area does not have the "ash borer" disease that we have gone thru. Around my area all of them have died.
    Best to you from Joyce In Indiana

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    1. John, I think you look very much like an old geezer with a beard...

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  3. Be glad Dorothy isn't a parrot perched on your shoulder 😁

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  4. I like a man with a beard, that's why I married one! Poor Dorothy, she does get in some scrapes, and poor you having to deal with the aftermath. You might have to get planting again if those ash trees are diseased! xx

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  5. Barbara Anne3:48 pm

    What in heaven's name are "bird fat balls"???? Poor Dorothy to have had such a bad reaction and poor John who has had much to clean up. Too bad one of the deckhands wasn't available to swab the decks for you. Arg!!! :)
    I think you look perfectly fine. DH also has a beard.

    Hugs!

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    1. They are seed balls held together with suet

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    2. Barbara Anne8:03 pm

      Ta! I can see why they made Dorothy sick and hope she's better now.

      Hugs!

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  6. The beard looks great! Will you keep it through the summer? (If we get a summer. It might get hot under a mask.)
    Your description of Dorothy's problem makes me wince...runny bulldog scale...ah well, you're a dog owner...just part of the price we pay for loving them, with their disgusting eating habits (anything...)

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  7. damn, this post title is a disappointment. I was hoping to see some fat balls (on lovely hairy men, of course).

    the full beard looks good on you.

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  8. Curious as to just how Dorothy was able to eat bird seed suet balls aka Bird Fat Balls [not ugly, hairy dingleberries] ... usually the suet balls are hung up on birdfeeders or from tree limbs and not usually accessible by chubby little bulldogs!

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    1. Also ... how can you NOT realize you've sprouted a full beard? Do you NOT look at yourself in a mirror every morning when you comb your hair, wash your face, brush your teeth ... survey the facial territory?!? SMH

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    2. To answer your questions
      I don’t know
      No

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  9. I've investigated whilst lounging after too much floor cleaning-I think you are possibly a bear man John(not sure what I am)x

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    1. How rude-I have abstained for over 10 years x

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    2. flis.5:38 pm

      Ps-very sorry John-I have delved into google again and yes I believe you are right-I had not heard the term fag hag before-(last time I was called a hag was from my trolls son)-I like it like that x

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  10. There have been lots of ash trees cut down locally due to ash dieback, let's hope that's not the case in your village. You need a motorbike and helmet to go with the beard 😀

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  11. Oh dear - have they got Ash Dieback?
    I suspect a lot of people will have a full beard now they permanently remove their masks

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  12. i really like the beard. you are looking more and more like russel crowe on your sidebar.

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  13. You look nice. The Ash trees sound poorly. The puppy ate masses of bird seed having ripped open the sack and has been pooping out seeds for days 😂

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  14. You look pensive. Be well.

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  15. Now you and your band of guerrilla tree-planters will have to plant new ash trees in the churchyard too!

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  16. Our ash tress in Ontario are being attacked by an insect. Our butternut trees are suffering too.
    we give our labrador pork scratchings rather than regular dog treats for training.

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  17. This is not the first time you have tricked me into reading your post with that title. One day the wind will change.

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  18. Yorkshire Liz5:39 pm

    My husband had had a full beard all his adult life, and most people thought it hilarious I never did see his chin. Consequently I am very fond of beards, and think it suits you! Someone once said that kissing a man without a beard was like dark eating a meal without salt and pepper. Or fat balls! Depends o. Your point of view......

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  19. The beard suits you, I think.

    Fat balls! Haha! I need to take a lesson from you on naming my blog posts.

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  20. Yes, I thought, "Oh here we go!" when I read your blog title. But it didn't go where I thought it might!

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  21. I think you look handsome.

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  22. That's a great picture of you and your beard looks neat and well trimmed. So many men these days have rather long "pandemic beards" and many are not well trimmed!

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  23. i like beards, and pirates xx

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  24. Oh lord. Our dog "recycles" at times. I had my girlfriends over to see the new house over a year ago. About a half an hour after they left, the dog vomited up a nasty pile of poop, onto the carpet where we were all just sitting. So glad she waited until company had left. Ugh! They're lucky they're cute!

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    1. William my old welsh terrier used to back into my bookcase and poop halfway up it

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  25. Got me worried re beard and I'm female . Tipped yoghurt over my scrubs - thankfully the apron hides the stain. What joy are we ever going to be without all this PPE?

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    1. We have a date that masks may be taken off ...July

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  26. love beards if well kept - husband and 2 sons have one. suurounded by facial hair

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  27. Pirates say, "Splice the Mainbrace!" and "Avast me Hearties!" They wear eyepatches and drink gallons of rum. They do not work in hospices caring for people whose lives are entering the endgame.

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  28. You look awfully stuffy in that photo. Still adorable, but stuffy. That book, "The Fine Art of Invisible Detection by Robert Goddard in the Bedroom Window Seat" sounds unusual.

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  29. Time to replace the ash trees with more laburnum?
    Bonnie in Minneapolis

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  30. Our Rocky once ate a seed feeder ball. The wind had blown it onto the grass and being an Elkhound with an appetite (they will eat anything) devoured it.

    Two days of perfectly formed seeded stools dropped on the lawn.

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  31. I do like your current glasses.

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  32. New glasses, a beard and a book - all very academic looking. Why, oh why, do our dogs eat odd things and then get disgustingly sick?

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  33. Looks good on you, you should keep it.

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  34. I love the beard - it is definitely echos of Russel Crowe (with a much nicer nature thank God! - he's a nasty piece of work). Dorothy is plain stupid - she must have felt sick well before the second ball. It's a pity there isn't a crate you could put her in to minimise the cleanup area.

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  35. I'm looking at all the pictures of you in the sidebar to the right, and your face is fairly bearded in all of them, so it's not like there's that much extra growth.

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  36. Sometimes I'm glad I don't have a dog - this is one of those times.
    Will you keep the longer beard or do a tidy up when masks come off for good?

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  37. You are looking thoughtful in the photo. Quiet contemplation?
    Our local birds rejected our last purchase of fat balls! Perhaps for good reason...
    An interesting thing about Ash dieback. There are two genetically different strains of Ash in the British Isles, and only one is susceptible to it.

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  38. You’re very handsome ♥️

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  39. I don't think all men suit beards.... but you do. You look very suave or swerve as my mum used to say. Love the specs too. Am pleased I don't have dogs to clean up after... but my cats keep me busy enough with headless mice etc.

    Jo in Auckland

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  40. Lovely photo of you John the glasses really suit you. I hope Dorothy is feeling better.

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