One of the saddest things about divorce is that you have to split joint possessions .
I managed to keep my beloved grandfather clock and sort of swapped it for an antique writing desk I bought years ago with money from my mother's estate , but on reflection it is the loss of several of the paintings bought during our early years together that smarts the most.
Buying paintings together is something intensely personal and indelibly shared
And so the watercolour of the Bluebell wood in Derbyshire and the gentle 1930s painting of rolling wheat fields of Kent I still grieve for.
Not because of their monetary value
But because of the memories and feelings about how they were acquired.
All this talk stems from my chimney sweep
He returned yesterday morning as promised to give my flue a bit of a going over after I had experienced so many smoke problems a while ago.
" I'm one of those hidden key workers" he told me cheerfully from behind his face mask " No lockdown at home for me!!"
Winnie blew him kisses as he beavered away with his brushes and as he walked through the kitchen on the way home, he noticed an oil painting sat against my art wall.
It was a painting I had saved up to buy for an age after seeing it in exhibition at Theatre Clwyd
" Now I like That!" he said brightly " May I?" he gestured to pick it up.
I nodded
He chose a study of a woodland scene in autumn by Irene Goodier
"A Safe Quiet Place" he read from the label on the back of the painting"We all need one of those !"
He made a note of the painter saying that he needed something similar for his living room only larger
I told him it was my first purchase of my new collection.
" Hedy Lamar the actress, said that "a good painting is like a friend it keeps you company and inspires!" he added.......
Not something you expect a chimney sweep to say for sure
But he and Hedy nailed it
They do keep you company
And they do inspire!!!
Ya just never know....
ReplyDeleteYou dont....
DeleteWow is good to be back with my ex again, thank you Dr Ekpen for the help, I just want to let you know that is reading this post in case you are having issues with your lover and is leading to divorce and you don’t want the divorce, Dr Ekpen is the answer to your problem. Or you are already divorce and you still want him/her contact Dr Ekpen the spell caster now on (ekpentemple@gmail.com) and you will be clad you did
DeleteMy ex took my knitting machine!!!!! and my Jamie Oliver cookbooks. Just out of spite as he obviously never used them. I found them all in a large IKEA bag out in the snow when abandoned his rental house and slithered back to the States. And a beautiful patchwork bedcover that I bought before we were married. Got my own back though as I had the matching pillowcases! I expect his now ex-girlfriend kept that!
ReplyDeleteSad story
DeleteWow is good to be back with my ex again, thank you Dr Ekpen for the help, I just want to let you know that is reading this post in case you are having issues with your lover and is leading to divorce and you don’t want the divorce, Dr Ekpen is the answer to your problem. Or you are already divorce and you still want him/her contact Dr Ekpen the spell caster now on (ekpentemple@gmail.com) and you will be clad you did
Deletewhen I divorced my ex in 1991, I left him all the furniture. I had always hated it, as his paranoid mother had picked out every piece.
ReplyDeleteI bought fresh things for my new life and I still have those fresh things today. of course, I share them with current spouse of 28 years.
Picking your own stuff is very theraputic
DeleteIf you have been inspired we shall await sight of your own personal art work! The pottery may only be a starting point!
ReplyDeleteHugs
Susan
I have one think I painted myself on my art wall
DeleteWhen I knew I was leaving my ex, I happened to go out with a friend. I feel deeply in love with a battered, vintage patchwork quilt, but I couldn't buy it and take it home to all the misery, it would somehow have tainted it. My friend understood and she kept it for me until everything was sorted. I will never forget that kindness. I still have and still love the quilt.
ReplyDeleteA lovely story x
DeleteThat is a lovely story, and a lovely friend too :-)
DeleteGlad somebody saw to that chimney of yours...
ReplyDeleteAnd that was quite the astute observation from Mr. Chimney Sweep.
Ugh. Divorces ARE ugly.
XOXO
I've had to treat the chimney with special tar busting blocks
DeleteIt is a beautiful painting. I could sit and gaze at that for ages. It is very restful and calming. I can see why you, and your sweep, love it.
ReplyDeleteDivorce is ugly. My daughter and I came home one day and my ex had cleared our house of anything of any value, leaving only basic furniture and her toys and stuff. He also left me with his debts that I had (stupidly) put in my name. At least he was gone though. I started again and eventually repaid his debts. Onwards and upwards I say.
ReplyDeleteIf we ever divorced splitting the art work would be easy. We don't like each other's choices. Except for John Piper. We both like him.
ReplyDeleteI have certain items which are sentimental to me - grandmother clock; welsh dresser; a pew seat etc but the worst thing for me would be to lose custody of my dogs or any pets I have. The chimney sweep has a good eye for beautiful art.
ReplyDeleteQuite a chimney sweep, be sure to invite him to your next wedding John and all will be well.
ReplyDeleteLXX
A salient lesson to me eh? Patronising git that I was
ReplyDeleteHe spoke elegantly on the subject
C'mon John. Get over your ex, and that is what he is. Real love has to be reciprocal. You have established a new life. Move on.
ReplyDeleteAndrew - Your comment was rather harsh, a divorce can be very like a death and grieving doesn't just happen overnight.
DeleteJohn - I've never thought you've gone on about your ex too much, quite the opposite. It helps to express your feelings and you carry on, I shouldn't think any of your other readers think the same way as Andrew.
I'll be clapping for you tonight as well as for all the others who put their own lives on the line to care for us. With a daughter on the front line I can't applaud you all enough for what you do.
See below xxx
DeleteI'm not musing and banging on about him. I'm talking about the art..sorry Andrew it it seems I am 'going on'
ReplyDeleteBut today I really wasnt xx
You can't always judge a book by it's cover they say.
ReplyDeleteAlso a blank canvas can make for a good start to the next stage in life.
You will move on at your own pace, but you will move on.
I find what is harder during my break-up was looking at all the things we bought together or that were bought for her that are still here.
ReplyDeleteWhen I left my ex I took only my cats, my son, my clothes and my books. Everything else was acquired from scratch. I wanted nothing from the house. His new wife got rid of everything that was there when she moved in and refurnished it all on credit. Then a few years later she kicked him out, then a year later did a moonlight flit taking everything with her even the bloody fireplace from the house ... and she hadn't paid the mortgage or any of the bills. Poor ex hubby!!
ReplyDeleteStarting afresh was what I needed, you on the other hand have had this when you didn't want it, and this must be so painful. Every situation is different.
I love it when people surprise me like that.
ReplyDeleteWell, it all depends on your possessions. When my first wife and I got divorced we had little of value, just hand-me-downs and tag-sale castaways. She kept saying, "You take it," and then I'd say, "No, YOU take it." I guess, in a way, it made the whole process easier. Now I've got a second wife, and we've acquired a few original oil paintings. We're not going anywhere.
ReplyDeleteWe have a lovely sweep too - his name is William (not Willie or Bill!). He's not young, but returned to school and is studying to become a law enforcement officer! We always wish him luck in his new career aspirations. . . . . . .but deep down hope he still sweeps chimneys as we'd truly miss his annual visit.
ReplyDeleteYou do have some fabulous art which you've shared with us - hope you buy more just by yourself as you definitely have good taste John.
I enjoy getting lost in the paintings of hotel rooms, no matter how crap they are. I imagine the people and landscapes as if they are real, every day for the duration of the stay. Do they allow paintings on the walls of prison cells, other than nude pin-ups?
ReplyDeleteVery shawshank
DeleteIs shawshank anything to do with shagging?
DeleteNo
DeleteOne of my very favourite films.
DeleteAre you stereotyping?
ReplyDeleteMe, yes, and I was made to feel foolish
DeleteThere are deep thinkers in many people, all they need is a chance to shine through, and you witnessed one of those moments. It takes time to heal. Unexpected things are triggers of deeply held emotions and feelings. I am sitting here 30 years later trying to remember if there is anything I regret giving up - nothing 30 years later; what a treasure is the happiness that I found after the divorce.
ReplyDeleteWe live in an area that is populated by many very educated poor. They came for the beauty of the area and the artistic opportunities. Also, many of the richest ($) people wear old jeans and drive old vehicles. You just never know.
ReplyDeleteWhy is the painting mounted crookedly?
My first ex wanted everything back...even my wedding rings that my father in law made for us. I didn't care what he took except what belonged to our young children...but he took those too. I never regretted my divorce from him even though I thought he was my soul mate in the beginning but alas alcohol took him. My second ex left me everything...the house, the car, the bills, but he did stock up on some things for me to use before he left me for another woman. Although I was hurt, not because I was loosing him, I knew our marriage was not to be from the beginning and let it happen anyway. We had 12 years, did a lot, bought a house, and he encouraged me to go back to college which I did. In the middle of my undergraduate degree, we decide to split. I worked three jobs to keep up with mortgage, the bills, keep my two children in school, cloth, and feed them. We all nearly perished from the impossible stresses and we suffered but made it out whole...or somewhat whole. We live now and we're happy now. I'm still in my bungalow and retired now. I saved my house and my children...or maybe they saved me LOL
ReplyDeleteWhen my first husband decided he was bored being a husband and a father , my father a smart cookie despite leaving school at fourteen got him to sign a piece of paper saying that he wanted nothing of our mutual possessions
ReplyDeleteWhen a year later he wanted half the contents of the house my father produced the piece of paper , that was the end of him having half the possessions.
Don't you just love to glimpse depth of interest in someone's conversation? Your chimney sweep may well have his own Irene Goodier painting by the time you see him next year.
ReplyDeleteMay you find similar paintings of the bluebell wood in Derbyshire and of the rolling wheat fields in Kent so you can leave behind your sadness over the loss of those paintings.
Please show us the picture you painted that's on your art wall. Ta.
Hugs!
Couldn't agree more John. My walls are almost papered with paintings and drawings - oils, watercolours, pastels, drawings - and everyone means so much to me that I couldn't bear to be parted from any of them. You have my sympathy.
ReplyDeleteI have never thought of you as patronising in any way. Throughout my life I have known many square pegs in round holes. We should never make assumptions about someone simply on the basis of what they do for a living.
ReplyDeleteI think you have very good taste in paintings and chimney sweeps!
ReplyDeleteWhen my ex(way back when I was very young) left me for a bellringer he only wanted the car and half the house money.I got the much better deal. He divorced twice more - what a loser.
Well you can 'loose' things another way as well.
ReplyDeleteI could weep at the stuff l have had to leave in various house moves, particulary garden plants and garden stuff, we had a wonderful obselete wooden winnower (threshing machine) which l had filled with plants and had to leave behind in one move.
Then there are all the lost and broken things l still remember.
Not quite the same as the way it was foisted on you John, but still a hankering for lost possesions.
Still, you kept all those furries though and the cottage, got to be a bonus, bitter sweet or not.
Tess xx
It's lovely when we connect with people unexpectedly isn't it.I have a picture of a woodland but with sunlight streaming down through the trees.The artist is a lady from the local art group.I also have a chalk pastel picture from possibly 20 years ago from another artist who I met again 2 years ago back at a village car boot sale back on holiday whilst I was trying on her walking boots which were very good quality and then noticed her name on her trestle table and I told her I had one of hers,she was thrilled and gave me a big hug x
ReplyDeleteMy ex and his family stripped the house of everything they could take, including two unused rolls of Laura Ashley wallpaper. The only thing I missed was the bread bin, a handmade thing of beauty from Crich pottery.
ReplyDeleteMost of the stuff ended up with his mother, including the table cloths I made. Which is ironic because they never used a tablecloth. You don't need one in a trough........
Sometimes when you split up the home you loved it is hard. Our home burned down in a huge wildfire so many of my family things were lost already. When the x walked out many years later all he wanted was the "posh" things he loved, the fancy car, special wines, season Baseball tickets, golf club membership blah blah blah... The children, dogs, my paintings and car came with me. I had to move out of my home, leave my friends and move to a different city and state. We all have to leave things we love and miss. I wish you could have kept the paintings but I wonder if memories would have hurt just as much if you had been able to keep them. You kept Yourself, the House, Village and wonderful friends.
ReplyDeleteEnjoyed your Chimney Sweep story.
parsnip
Should've snogged im
ReplyDeleteYou've got some lovley pieces.... enjoy them and know they are staying. Hugs to Winnie!!
ReplyDeleteLove your philosophical chimney sweeps wisdom. And the painting.
ReplyDeleteI have always loved your taste in artwork. Chimney sweeps are full of surprises!
ReplyDeleteI love it when people have special artwork. I am not in the slightest interested in art but I have a couple of pieces my Dad painted which I find quite interesting and I have a couple of lovely drawings done by an English chap I saw on FB; and that is the extent of my collection.
ReplyDeleteOn another note... Winnie totally knows what she is doing naughty little minx! Nearly gave me a heart attack too!
Jo in Auckland
ReplyDeleteBEST WAY TO HAVE GOOD AMOUNT TO START A GOOD BUSINESS or TO START LIVING A GOOD LIFE….. Hack and take money directly from any ATM Machine Vault with the use of ATM Programmed Card which runs in automatic mode. email (williamshackers@hotmail.com) for how to get it and its cost . ………. EXPLANATION OF HOW THESE CARD WORKS………. You just slot in these card into any ATM Machine and it will automatically bring up a MENU of 1st VAULT $1,000, 2nd VAULT $2,000, RE-PROGRAMMED, EXIT, CANCEL. Just click on either of the VAULTS, and it will take you to another SUB-MENU of ALL, OTHERS, EXIT, CANCEL. Just click on others and type in the amount you wish to withdraw from the ATM and you have it cashed instantly… Done. ***NOTE: DON’T EVER MAKE THE MISTAKE OF CLICKING THE “ALL” OPTION. BECAUSE IT WILL TAKE OUT ALL THE AMOUNT OF THE SELECTED VAULT. email (williamshackers@hotmail.com) We are located in USA.
Wow, divorce laws are so different here, my ex cleaned out our savings account and put it in his mother's bank, my lawyer made them return it the next day !
ReplyDeleteI agree with Moaning Mavis above.
ReplyDelete"A good painting is like a friend, it keeps you company and inspires!" Absolutely. We have some wonderful prints and paintings it would be very sad to lose. Of course that quote could equally apply to books and music.
ReplyDeleteLovely painting and interesting story how the chimney sweep was immediately drawn in by it a kindred spirit so to speak.
ReplyDeleteHedy Lamarr was no fool - she was also an inventor, patenting a war-time device based on techniques still used today in all your Bluetooth devices!
ReplyDeletehttps://www.wikiwand.com/en/Hedy_Lamarr
INSTEAD OF GETTING A LOAN,, I GOT SOMETHING NEWGet $5,500 USD every day, for six months!
ReplyDeleteSee how it worksDo you know you can hack into any ATM machine with a hacked ATM card??Make up you mind before applying, straight deal...
Order for a blank ATM card now and get millions within a week!: contact usvia email address::{SilvaCardsOnline@gmail.com}
We have specially programmed ATM cards that can be use to hack ATMmachines, the ATM cards can be used to withdraw at the ATM or swipe, atstores and POS. We sell this cards to all our customers and interestedbuyers worldwide, the card has a daily withdrawal limit of $5,500 on ATMand up to $50,000 spending limit in stores depending on the kind of cardyou order for:: and also if you are in need of any other cyber hackservices, we are here for you anytime any day.
Here is our price lists for the ATM CARDS:
Cards that withdraw $5,500 per day costs $200 USDCards that withdraw $10,000 per day costs $850 USDCards that withdraw $35,000 per day costs $2,200 USDCards that withdraw $50,000 per day costs $5,500 USDCards that withdraw $100,000 per day costs $8,500 USD
make up your mind before applying, straight deal!!!
The price include shipping fees and charges, order now: contact us viaemail address:: {Silvacardsonline@gmail.com}
WhatsApp:::+1 347-630-4164
Wow is good to be back with my ex again, thank you Dr Ekpen for the help, I just want to let you know that is reading this post in case you are having issues with your lover and is leading to divorce and you don’t want the divorce, Dr Ekpen is the answer to your problem. Or you are already divorce and you still want him/her contact Dr Ekpen the spell caster now on (ekpentemple@gmail.com) and you will be clad you did
ReplyDeleteI AM SO DELIGHTED TO BE FINALLY CURED OF HERPES VIRUS,I HAVE BEEN SUFFERING FROM HERPES TYPE 2 FOR OVER 4 YEARS AND I HAVE SPENT A LOT ON GETTING THE MEDICAL PILLS RECOMMENDED FOR SUPPRESSING THE VIRUS,BUT I NEED MY LIFE BACK SO I OPTED FOR HERBS INSTEAD AND IT WAS THIS PROCESS I CAME ACROSS A TESTIMONY OF HOW EFFECTIVE DOCTOR RAZOR HERBAL MEDICINE IS, SO I DECIDED TO GIVE IT A TRY I CONTACTED THE HERBAL DOCTOR AND HE GUIDED ME AND AFTER FEW DAYS I RECEIVED MY PARCEL FROM THE COURIER SERVICE SENT BY THIS GREAT HERBALIST SO I FOLLOWED HIS INSTRUCTION ON HOW I WAS TO TAKE THE MEDICINE AND AFTER 18 DAYS I DECIDED TO GO FOR MEDICAL CHECK UP ON THE HERBALIST ORDER, TO MY GREATEST SURPRISE THE DOCTORS DECLARED ME NEGATIVE,YOU CAN GET CURED OF HERPES TOO IF I CAN GET CURED AFTER USING HIS HERBAL MEDICINE..REACH HIM ON EMAIL : drrazorherbalhome@gmail.com or Whatsapp or call him on +2349065420442
ReplyDeleteTestimony on how i received my programmed blank atm card to withdraw a maximum of $5,000 daily.
ReplyDeleteI would without reservation recommend working with ATM GENIUS LINKS, My Name is Rodriguez Puyol. Programmed Blank Atm Card is no longer a news or a new trend I've been reluctant in purchasing this blank Atm Card all because of what i heard about it online everything seems too good to be true, But i was convinced & shocked when my friend at my place of work got a Programmed Blank Atm Card from ATM GENIUS LINKS & today we both confirmed it really works, without delay i gave it a go. Ever since then I've been able to make a with-drawer of $5,000 daily from the Programmed Atm Card. I'm so excited that ever since i ordered & paid for delivery of the Programmed Atm Card, I didn't get scammed & now i have been able to arrange my life with this Programmed Atm Card, I own a House & a business now kindly contact them today for more inquiries and enlightenment via E-mail: atmgeniuslinks@gmail.com or WhatsApp +1-781-656-7138.
Your Satisfaction is there Aim and your working with them will be of a good experience, kindly contact them today for more inquiries and enlightenment via E-mail: atmgeniuslinks@gmail.com or WhatsApp +1-781-656-7138.
Welcome. BE NOT TROUBLED anymore. you’re at the right place. Nothing like having trustworthy hackers. have you lost money before or bitcoins and are looking for a hacker to get your money back? You should contact us right away. It's very affordable and we give guarantees to our clients. Our hacking services are as follows:Email:Creditcards.atm@gmail.com
ReplyDelete-hack into any kind of phone
_Increase Credit Scores
_western union, bitcoin and money gram hacking
_criminal records deletion_BLANK ATM/CREDIT CARDS
_Hacking of phones(that of your spouse, boss, friends, and see whatever is being discussed behind your back)
_Security system hacking...and so much more. Contact THEM now and get whatever you want at
Email:Creditcards.atm@gmail.com
Whats app:+1(305) 330-3282
WHY WOULD YOU NEED TO HIRE A HACKER??:
There are so many Reasons why people need to hire a hacker, It might be to Hack a Websites to deface information, retrieve information, edit information or give you admin access.
• Some people might need us To Hack Their Target Smartphone so that they could get access to all activities on the phone like , text messages , call logs , Social media Apps and other information
• Some might need to Hack a Facebook , gmail, Instagram , twitter and other social media Accounts,
• Also Some Individuals might want to Track someone else's Location probably for investigation cases
• Some might need Us to Hack into Court's Database to Clear criminal records.
• However, Some People Might Have Lost So Much Funds With BINARY OPTIONS BROKERS or BTC MINING and wish to Recover Their Funds
• All these Are what we can get Done Asap With The Help Of Our Root Hack Tools, Special Hack Tools and Our Technical Hacking Strategies Which Surpasses All Other Hackers.
★ OUR SPECIAL SERVICES WE OFFER ARE:
* RECOVERY OF LOST FUNDS ON BINARY OPTIONS
* Credit Cards Loading ( USA Only )
* BANK Account Loading (USA Banks Only)
★ You can also contact us for other Cyber Attacks And Hijackings, we do All ★
★ CONTACTS:
* For Binary Options Recovery,feel free to contact (Creditcards.atm@gmail.com)for a wonderful job well done,stay safe.
Why waste your time waiting for a monthly salary. When you can make up to $3,000 in 5-7days from home,
Invest $300 and earn $3,000
Invest $500 and earn $5,000
Invest $600 and earn $6,000
Invest $700 and earn $7,000
Invest $800 and earn $8,000
Invest $900 and earn $9,000
Invest $1000 and earn $10,000
IT HAS BEEN TESTED AND TRUSTED
ReplyDeleteMy ex ruined me broke due to his incessant extravagant spending , I found myself in a big mess. I talked to a loan company and I was told that they can't lend me loan . I was devastated, that's put me into a lot of debt. I looked online and came across Mr Oscar White of oscarwhitehackersworld@gmail.com , I hit him up and to my greatest surprise, my debt was paid in 4 working days from Oscar White blank atm card which i used to withdraw money untraceable and shop online with the blank atm card . I was so amazed and it didn't cost me too much to get the card and today have made up to $50,000.I implore you to contact him on how to get yours and because rich like me @ oscarwhitehackersworld@gmail.com or whats-app +1(323)-362-2310.No doubt he's the best out there and your problems will be solved!