Mrs Thomas Has A Funeral



Mrs Thomas was an old farmer's wife
For the past couple of years she has been resident in a local residential home ( where I nursed her last year) but before that she lived in Bryn Rodyn Farm on the outskirts of the village.
She had a sing song Welsh voice, a bad tempered red terrier called Barney and made loaf after loaf of bara brith for one of my allotment open days , the big one that raised a thousand quid in two hours!
She was well known and well respected by the older members of the village community.

Well it was her funeral today.

I say Funeral , fairly loosely as all you are " allowed" nowadays is  12 mourners and an outside service of sorts, and so as a mark of respect I stood in my field with the ponies as the Minister led he family into the graveyard, the little knots of people separate from each other by the required six feet.
It looked like no Funeral I was used to.
The minister had a fine, strong voice and I could almost hear every word of the bilingual service from  a hundred yards away and as I stood the ponies congregated around blowing down their noses at me.
I turned and for a few moments exhaled loudly as they inhaled our noses touching.
It's always a magical moment when ponies do that.
A breathing hello between two species.


Everyday now in lockdown the Churchyard cockerels fly over the wall to have a brief meal of old cat food. They come because the dogs are all over at Trendy Carol's and there is no hysteria over their visit.

It's been a warm , blue sky day today

70 comments:

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  2. It's like a very grounding moment when ponies do that, I know what you mean. My friend 'attended' her father's funeral this week via video link from the crematorium as did all the mourners. Funerals are like no other at the moment, as you say.

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  3. Maybe it was the sort of funeral Mrs Thomas would have liked. When the farmer died farmers from miles around came to pay their respects - the church overflowed and so did the churchyard and there were well over a hundred at the reception afterward. The farmer was a very private man and I have often wondered what kind of funeral he would have liked. The idea of the cockerels and the ponies would certainly appeal to me.

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  4. I was wondering how the funerals would look like while most of the world is in quarantine. Now I imagined it, while reading your post.

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    Replies
    1. Another thing in common across the world

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  5. I sadly attended my Mothers funeral by video link in November last year due to me living in NZ (for 35 years) her in the UK...we cried and snotted and felt the same feelings as we would have had we have been there in person in the flesh as my sister and her family did on the day... no emotions were that different to my mind... R.I.P Mrs Thomas... you are mourned and very much missed by whom...it matters not!

    Jo in Auckland

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  6. It's a new normal. A little heartbreaking.

    Communing with another living being in a way that both beings understand is a wonderful thing. Glad you had a moment with your hooved friends.

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  7. To me that seems preferable to the usual Church /Cremotorium full of people.I think on occasion a Funeral can be impersonable and this sounds more poignant somehow x

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    Replies
    1. Apart from the distance between the mourners

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  8. Barbara Anne3:03 pm

    Mrs. Thomas certainly seems to have been a contributing member of her community. Even though odd, the funeral seems very fitting for her. I'm glad you could show your respects beside the equine attendees.

    What beautiful cockerels!

    Hugs!

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  9. We are living in truly strange times aren't we. RIP Mrs Thomas.

    It was my Mum's neighbours funeral today and of course none of his many friends could go, just the very immediate family. We chatted about it for a while and in a very strange coincidence a hearse and lone funeral car drove slowly past our place as I stood outside in the sunshine. Very poignant, very sad, a strange kind of visual link between Wales and England while we chatted.

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    Replies
    1. We are living through very odd days

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  10. You make me sorry that I never knew her. Nice eulogy.

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    Replies
    1. The minister was magnificent , he sounded like Richard Burton

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  11. Farewell Mrs Thomas. Farewell.

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  12. Both my parents had graveside services rather than formal funerals. They can be quite lovely if the weather's good.

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  13. When I got news by phone of my mom's terminal kidney cancer, I (once I got off the floor and the ground outside, because this knocked me right to my knees twice), I headed out to the pasture where there were about six horses. I'm wary of horses and wasn't seeking them out, but they came gallopping up to me and gathered closely around me as if in solidarity. What a comfort that was. They are sensitive, compassionate creatures. -Kate

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    Replies
    1. Wow, how wonderful ♥️

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    2. Animals can be a great panacea to crap and anxiety

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  14. A graveside service sounds nice. Hope you have better weather than we do. It's chilly here, still.
    Mrs. Thomas seemed like a fun old lady. May she rest in peace.
    Those are two nice cocks.
    XOXO

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    Replies
    1. The weather has been glorious , which is unfortunate in a lockdown

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  15. Thank you for being there for your neighbor, in life and after. One lesson learned from 1918, was that people who gathered for funerals, often had more funerals to attend. Though not easy, we have learned a bit over the past 100 years.

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    Replies
    1. Show girls like this would feel cheated if we had to have a small affair

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  16. Even now, in some way, the rituals of life and death continue.

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  17. Horses just know.
    Glad you could pay respect, even if at a distance

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  18. Funerals here are 10 people or less. There are "drive through" visitations now, and live streaming services. Mrs. Thomas sounded like a dear woman, and deserved much better than this.
    Oh, the warm snuffle of a horse, by your face, those whiskers tickling skin - the gentleness of their souls, their pure connections with us. J'adore.

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    Replies
    1. They were and are so gentle when you quieten them with your breath

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  19. Lovely story, the horses were wonderful addition to the service.
    The Churchyard cockerels have grown up ? they always seem so small.
    parsnip

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    Replies
    1. They have survived so well during two winters

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  20. Nice to be able to pay your respects from the pasture side of the wall. And, what a lovely and grounding treat to have the ponies join you. I love that exchange of breath.

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    Replies
    1. It's very relaxing
      I try to do it daily

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  21. I am glad my father passed away before this started. We have still not placed his ashes in the wall. We were waiting for a warmer day. Now we are just waiting.

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  22. That's 5 more people than allowed here. My sister-in-law's mother-in-law's funeral is in a few weeks' time and it's only 5 allowed including the vicar. What a lovely John Gray way to show your respects - I'm sure she would have loved it!

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    Replies
    1. The perk of living next to the graveyard

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  23. Both of my parents had simple graveside services as that was their wish. But we were not separated by distance as is necessary today. We were able to support one another as it should be.

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    Replies
    1. I want a MASSIVE funeral

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    2. You mean with a MASSIVE hole? They'll have to bring in a couple of MASSIVE JCB diggers.

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    3. We know ... with your elegant lady dressed head to toe in black, wearing a thick veil and putting a single red rose on your coffin.

      We have it planned ..... hehehe

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  24. Most funerals are being live-streamed here (a maximum of ten attendees including the celebrant and staff) with memorials put on hold.
    I am glad that you could attend (at a distance) and love the pony presence (and the cockerels).

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    Replies
    1. The ponies are staying another three weeks or so

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    2. There are so many people dying in NYC that the funeral homes are not able to handle the demand. Those whose bodies were not claimed by loved ones were put in boxes and buried in mass graves on Heart Island. For 150 years this has been the final resting place for the poor and those who have died unloved and forgotten. It was stunning and heartbreaking to see that scene on TV.

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    3. SpikesBestMate3:19 pm

      That is so sad. I once read of someone who devoted her retirement years to attending the funerals of the unloved in her locality. She and a few like-minded souls devised a rota system to ensure all funerals in their area were covered. They received no payment, nor claimed travel expenses.

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  25. May Mrs. Thomas rest in peace. I agree with Weave, perhaps it was just the kind of service she may have wanted. There are no funerals taking place in our area right now...none. If it's a burial then caskets are being placed on hold in crypts and cremation ashes are sent via UPS to the family. All the obituaries read "service at a later date". There's going to be quite a crush in a few weeks (or months) when the ban is lifted. Take care John. Glad you're feeling better. X

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    Replies
    1. Oh God ... imagine getting your relatives ashes through UPS delivery. I can think of nothing worse :-(

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  26. A sad and touching event, but rather touching in an oldfashioned way, to gather in the churchyard. My family doesn't do funerals, just cremation then optional party later on.
    Not sure what is happening here in NY with all those who have succumbed to the virus, rather ghastly and a long wait.

    I'm not familiar w horses but my previous pug would blow in my face and wait for me to puff back; we 'd exchange silent greetings that way, he never barked.

    lizzy

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  27. I can not tell you how much I love the pictures of the chickens. They are so beautiful. Could we please see the ponies?

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    Replies
    1. The ponies are in the first (top) picture! Noses to the camera!

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  28. This made me a bit teary. The cockerels are beautiful.

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  29. Wonderful picture of the cockerels.

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  30. Very sad John. Maybe they can have a remembrance service at a later date.

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  31. It's my uncles funeral next week. He died in hospital having caught Covid 19 there after suffering a fractured hip. As he lives the other end of the country, only my cousin is attending her father's funeral, I shall go and sit in our Church yard at the time.

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    Replies
    1. So sorry to hear this, how sad. xx

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  33. I'm glad you were able to be out there. Somehow even more powerful than being part of the group. Even 12 aren't permitted here. It must be so hard.

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  34. OK John, I had to come back to your blog and post this for you once I had read Allison's post, (http://retiredbicycle.blogspot.com/) for today, "These are the cockerels who live in Wales in the village with an unpronounceable name. That's a plate of cat food between them. The man who writes Going Gently posted it. It's just a lovely photograph."

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  35. I'm glad you were able to pay your respects, it is so difficult for Mourning the deceased during a Time of Pandemic. Most cannot be there in person at the Death Bed if the Loved One is Hospitalized it's just not allowed and at least lovely, kind Nurses and Doctors are using their Phones for a Last Goodbye to the Family via Technology. We live near a huge Cemetery and every day now there are numerous Funerals, but the processions have to be Small and usually limited to Immediate Family Members. Just an added layer of sadness and vast Change from our Normal.

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