Sunday, 24 June 2018

Lady Troubridge


It's 23 degrees in the garden and Winnie has been given strict instructions to lie nipple down of the cool concrete of the shady patio.
For the next five days I am on my own in the cottage and I have been musing what to do with myself today.
The roads have been busy with day trippers, so after buying salad items, crab sticks and lime cordial and half toying with a trip to Colwyn Bay, I have contented myself with a comfortable sit under the garden parasol with the 1926 publication of Etiquette and Entertaining by Lady Troubridge
I'm presently reading the chapter entitled Modern maids and how to use them! 

I'm liking Lady Troubridge, her encouraging words to the faint hearted 1920's housewife is true spirt that won the war stuff.
"We are not all born with courage, but it's latent in all of us and can and should be pulled out whenever the occasion arises. Pulled out for all these fears. For the little ones first, by way of practice , and then, when you've made friends with courage , you'll only have to stretch out your hand to find it materialising at command. .............never ever be afraid . Be sad and sorry sometimes , because we all must be that way now and then . Be perplexed because life is not all plain sailing . But never let life be too much for you. It won't if you take as your motto these three words which I'll repeat again........NEVER BE AFRAID." 
Lady Troubridge



66 comments:

  1. Una Vincenzo, Lady Troubridge was a British sculptor and translator. She is best known as the long-time lesbian partner of Marguerite Radclyffe Hall, author of The Well of Loneliness

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    1. Yes, good words, Never Ever Be Afraid. Thanks John.xxx

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    2. Lawks! Radclyffe Hall. She was a barrel of laughs...

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  2. Oh this is so perfect for so many people to read .. now, these days, at this time in our world and in our lives.
    Your timing is perfect John.

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  3. have a nice day relaxing in your garden, john.

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  4. A good motto to live by. Your tray looks very appetising.

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    1. I may not be a lady Troubridge but I do have my standards

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  5. John you never disappoint. That passage is a keeper.

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  6. I don't know about never being afraid. That dog looks kind of terrified :)

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  7. Love the thought - though I'm not sure how you can born without courage, yet somehow it is latent within you, haha...

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  8. John, I love those words, "never be afraid". Good words to try and live life by. I had to look up 23 degrees Celsius. Living in the USA I am afraid I don't hear Celsius temps very often. It looks like you have a lovely garden.

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  9. Never be afraid - I love that! The jug with fruit slices looks very thirst quenching. I hope you have lots to amuse you over the next five days. x

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  10. Good advice here! Lady Troubridge was a wise woman.

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  11. She doesn't look like she'd be afraid of anything.....If there's day trippers abroad why not make a few pennies off them by offering tea in the garden and a tour of your lovely cottage. Winnie would certainly enjoy it.

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  12. Oh my. Our ideas of a hot day are certainly different!
    What are crab sticks?
    Thanks for including the picture of a woman who was NOT AFRAID! And pray tell- how does one use a maid?

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  13. Yes, I am wondering the same as Ms Moon.....what are crab sticks??? I shouldn't need the info on using a maid, as I AM the maid. :-)

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    1. See.....
      https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crab_stick

      Lovely with half fat creek fresh , herbs and lemon

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  14. I never used to be afraid of anything (apart from the dentist) but as I get older I seem to be afraid of everything!

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  15. Sensible words 🙂

    Your table, food and drink look like a little oasis of cool on a roasting hot day, enjoy.

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  16. Oh yes! Una Lady Troubridge and Radclyffe Hall! Lesbian heroes!

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  17. I love your new look! My mother taught me how to use old-fashioned maids. It wasn't very nice.

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  18. I would love to read that book, sounds like something I would enjoy. As does the lime cordial.

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    1. It still can be bought on amazon ...it's a delightful read....and very Of it's time

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  19. Lady Troutbridge's advice should be given to all at risk from suicide. Perhaps The Samaritans should read out that extract as a matter of course whenever somebody phones up to express their suicidal thoughts.

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    1. She sounds a remarkable woman the more I read about her

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  20. Think I would just join Winnie.

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  21. "Never let life be too much for you." Indeed. Once you let life overwhelm you, you're in big trouble. Onwards and upwards!

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  22. For a second I misread "for the little ones first"; mentally it was show children how to overcome fear.That's OK, too. I need to look into her work.

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  23. After your comment that Lady Troubridge was the lesbian partner of Radclyffe Hall, I just had to Google her for more info! However, the results have left me confused, as there seem to be a number of Lady Troubridges, and it may have been a different one who wrote the etiquette book!
    http://lucindaville.blogspot.com/2009/07/etiquette-wednesday-lady-troubridge.html

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    1. Perhaps we will never know

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    2. I have seen a photo of the lady in the front of the book I was talking about , she looks the same lady just somewhat older

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  24. Her words do hold wisdom. I think most people have their own wars to win, we seldom know what it takes for anyone to get through their days. Especially when they are going through a difficult time.

    Practicing courage on the little problems first is a particularly good idea Lady T had. I find that exercising our courage adds to the confidence needed to cope with life's hardest times. Often if I feel overwhelmed I tell myself to just begin to do the next right thing, without committing to finishing it. Once I'm busy doing that I find it easy enough to complete it and go on to the next one. -Mary

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    1. Best foot forward dearheart x

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  25. Thankyou for this John and Lady Troubridge,I will repeat this to myself often.I've always been afraid but have been a bit braver since I turned 50.I sometimes visualise myself as Dorothy or the lion in the Wizard of Oz x

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  26. Words to live by, John. Love to all at your cottage.

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  27. Thank you for the words on fear. I shall use them this week when I have my lengthy dental appointment.

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  28. Women of her generation almost had no choice but to be courageous. Many in the US don't realize the toll WW1 took on England. We here across the pond lost more to the Spanish Flu than to combat. England lost almost an entire generation of men. And how actually egalitarian the losses were: A soldier who had been a bus driver before joining might have a Lord on one side of him and a famous author on the other. Women, Englishwomen, were left to maintain the country and family. Their courage was admirable.

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  29. Your afternoon sounds so civilized! In the heat I drag around like an old slipper and eat whatever is closest to hand, guzzling water like a thirsty camel. I do like that quote and think a lot of people could use that advice.

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  30. That hit me directly in the old memory bank.She sounds much like my grandmother...raised 7 children almost on her own...husband died suddenly. No social safety net in those days, but she was the queen of making do. When things get me down, I always think of her and her courage to "pull herself up by her bra straps" and get things done. Your picnic looks lovely- I also like to dine under the umbrella in my garden whenever possible.

    Barb

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    1. I love your expression "her courage to 'pull herself up by her bra straps' and get things done". Your grandmother sounds much like my own grandmother, whose husband suffered collapsed lungs (and, soon, emphysema) and became an invalid at a young age, during the Great Depression. With three young school-aged children and her desperately ill husband to feed, and bills to pay, and with, as you note, no social safety net back then, my grandmother took a factory job. She literally ran home during her lunch break to see if my grandfather was still alive and to feed him, and then ran back to the factory to finish her shift.

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    2. It's one of mine ginger

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    3. Excellent! Thanks for letting me know. You have a witty way with words, John. I did a quick search of your blog and found many references to bra straps, including this gem, aptly titled "Pulling Oneself Up By The Bra Straps", from four years ago this month. https://disasterfilm.blogspot.com/2014/06/pulling-oneself-up-by-bra-straps.html So I donned my bra this evening, firmly pulled up the straps and do you know what? I was able to take a DEEP breath, the kind of breath needed to resolutely get things done!

      I will certainly remember this pithy expression and act accordingly when the need arises. And I will think of you.

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  31. Easy to say/ write; hard to live up to....

    lizzy

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  32. Great name for a race horse. A filly of course. I can see her winning at Chester.

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    1. I'd love to have a lady Troubridge in the village

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  33. I don't believe I've ever seen a woman with a monocle before.

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    1. It's a statement piece for sure

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  34. After reading Liz's comment on there being more than one Lady Troubridge, I googled :Lady Troubridge" and your blog post comes up third in the entire list of results, John!

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    1. I'm an internet sensation

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  35. I would love to be there with you John enjoying the cool temperature under the parasol - it's 100F here and our air conditioning is on the blink upstairs, phew it's roasting. . . . . and I'm not happy today!

    . . . . . . . I so agree though, "life is never plain sailing!".

    Mary - whom today, wishes she never left cool Devon!

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    1. It's bloody hot here for Wales it's sweltering

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  36. It's interesting how some words of wisdom stick with you when challenges are upon you. My husband is a Builder so faces difficulties regularly which can be testing. He is often heard to mutter to himself a saying from one of our former Prime Ministers Malcolm Frazer "Life wasn't meant to be easy" somehow it takes the edge of the difficulty of the task so I can see how Lady Troubridge wanted to share this empowerment with women whose position in service would probably have been without voice and is still very relevant today particularly with regards domestic violence, courage is so vital to make changes to ones circumstances.

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    1. Terry wogan used to shout " courage Camille !" On his Morning radio show

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  37. What a delicious and cool collection of food you have prepared for a hot day, John. I see a 'friend' eyeing it up though! You might have to share. Lady Troubridge is someone I will follow up. Thank goodness for Amazon's secondhand books.

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    1. George was there too but he's kinda short to get in the shot

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  38. You leave me with a grin.

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  39. I needed that quote John... I needed courage the last few days and it was seriously lacking.. I've started a new job after 10 years of not having to work.. I'm finding my brain a little rusty...lol Its very much a public speaking job and i don't do well public speaking... whatever possessed me to apply for this job?? But i so want it to work out... so i must have courage.. and faith that if i stick with it long enough i will no longer be afraid.. Hugs! deb

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  40. Anonymous10:36 am

    I had to laugh upon realizing the gist of your story. After all, Lady Troubridge had a dachsie! Dachsies are never, I mean never afraid, and have well developed self-discipline, so she had a wonderful example. Penelope - from the far west coast of the northern hemisphere :-)

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  41. Thank you so much for sharing this.

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