The Pillow of Porn

Not much happening tonight
Chris went to Church
I've been watching Eurovision past winners on youtube
And Winnie
Well Winnie has been rubbing her fanny all over the new bulldog cushion
She now has her own sex toy
It's all got rather unsavoury
We've had the infamous slippers of sex
Now it's the pillow of porn

26 comments:

  1. never a dull moment at your house, is there?

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    Replies
    1. Not for masturbating bulldogs...
      For me ....it's getting all a bit dull x

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  2. Anonymous10:24 pm

    Maybe now she'll leave Chris' feet alone lol.

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    Replies
    1. The " slippers of sex" are in the wash

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  3. I hope you removed the loved-up cushion before Chris returned from church. There are certain things a respectable church warden just doesn't want to witness.

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    Replies
    1. He wears the " slippers of sex" he's under no illusions

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  4. John, you are the light and laughter in my life! I'm in sad shape, aren't I?

    Happy Easter.

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    Replies
    1. I am the wind beneath your wings xxx

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    2. You're the cream in my coffee... you're the salt in my stew... you're the starch in my skiiivvvies... what would I do without you?!

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  5. Oh village life! A little of this, and a little of that.

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  6. Omg! What would happen if Chris was wearing the slippers of sex and holding the pillow of sex ??????

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    Replies
    1. He would be in hospital......

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    2. Lol!!!! Best Chris remembers not to wear the slippers of sex anywhere near the pillow of sex .

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  7. Anonymous11:53 pm

    lol
    Do you have Lover's Lane there?

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  8. Does that make you a voyeur ? ! Happy Easter !

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  9. ummmmm the pillow is looking pretty bad !
    Worst for wear I think.

    cheers, parsnip

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  10. Gotta love that Winnie and her wicked ways!!

    Jo in Auckland, NZ

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  11. Sounds cozy. Or something.

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  12. The Great Scot, of the witty rejoinders, walked by as I was laughing hysterically at this post, scanned it quickly, and rejoined with: "OMG, the bulldog just snatched herself!'

    *crying here*

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  13. Ah such visions of backward village life you conjure with your delicate scribing my good man.

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  14. eeh lad, yer've a way with words! Winnie is in need of the 'op'?
    Hope you're both having a lovely, quiet day and maybe some sunshine too.xx

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  15. Has W caught the habit by spying on you?

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  16. Will it be joining the slippers of sex?

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  17. Our Lab, Rosie, has a teddy that we not very subtly named Humpy. :) Acually he's her all around comfort woobie. She also likes to suck/bite his face when she feels emotionally overwrought, and our younger Lab knows if she wants a game she only has to start playing with Humpy and laidback Rosie will come to try and get him back, so he is now resewn in every seam after many a tug of war. He should be renamed Frankenhumpy, since he now has a creepy fake fur patch sewn on over part of his much-sucked face to keep him going for her a bit longer. :)

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