Sunday, 3 November 2013

Being Crossed

Truce. Winifred shows Albert her arse
The secret of coping with a minor war between two animals is threefold
1. Keep both well fed
2. Keep both well exercised
3. Have a dirty  " look"that could fell a small child at 20 feet ready if violence is indicted

Albert's bad mood and subsequent whipping of Winifred's arse yesterday afternoon went down like a pork chop at a synagogue. It was all over nothing as Winifred got all hefty and silly following an unthinking face rub from the cat........but the bulldog sulked dreadfully following this uncharacteristic show of feline power and sought her revenge this morning when she caught Albert snoozing on the couch.
Luckily I caught the fat fart with a withering look before she could do some serious damage with her big mouth and her heavy paws and both animals returned to their respective corners
peace has now returned to chez Bwthyn-y-llan.

Bitches, in my experience , never forget a slight
They are like most women and middle aged gay men in that respect
Cross a bitch and her eyes will narrow ever so slightly she she sees you
Cross me and I will do the same

Winifred will have her revenge
In this life ....or the next

35 comments:

  1. 'Hell hath no fury like a woman's scorn'. Just don't mess with them I say. What you need is one of those loud bells that you can ring when they get into a scrap whilst shouting 'time out, time out'.

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    1. I posted this in the hope of getting some " crossing the bitch" stories

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  2. oh my! winnie could inflict nasty pain on albert.

    and yeah, as a woman, I NEVER forget an unkindness done unto me; that person is dead to me from then on. that person never gets a chance to hurt me again.

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    1. I hear you sister!
      Jane x

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    2. Do tell your " I've been crossed " stories

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  3. Why not make a small saddle for Winifred's back so that Albert can ride her around the Ukrainian village? You could also make Albert a little cowboy suit with a hole at the back for his tail. Cats rule!

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    1. YP.....
      You are too placid
      Can't envision u being pissed off with anyone

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  4. My money is on Albert. After having dogs my whole life, a stray kitten came along and adopted the whole lot of us. We all know who the Queen Bee is around here and it ain't me...

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  5. So what happens if a woman and a middle-aged gay man cross each other?

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    1. You can hear the screaming across the atlantic

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  6. I used to have an airedale terrier. (just saying that makes me want to get another one. I must wait.) I also had a (questionable) Persian cat. The cat came about two years before the dog. And every now and then, for no reason at all, the cat would Bitch-slap the dog. Sounds right to me!

    Cindy Bee

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    1. We always wanted an Airedale but had 2 welsh terriers instead

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  7. Albert will be cat napping & keeping one eye on Winifred I suspect.

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  8. Not to worry about Albert....cats have eyes in the back of their heads. Winnifred needs to take care.

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  9. Whoa, this is serious. I can't read bulldog, but I see it in Albert's ears.

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    1. Strangely they both have just been sitting together ten minutes ago
      !

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  10. Reminds me of when my daughter came home after graduating from college. She brought with her the Basset Hound she had adopted - and I had a cat. Kitty (the very rare and exquisite name of my cat) objected strenuously and told Amos off in so many ways I lost count. However, the dog really wanted to be friends and persisted. Then came the day when both were sleeping on Diane's bed, though at opposite ends. The space between them grew smaller. I can't say they ever cuddled, but they did learn to tolerate each other and sometimes napped closely.

    Nancy in Iowa

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  11. We have to keep our new addition separated from our cat--He thinks that she's prey, and would never be able to get a swipe in before she becomes a meal. We've had 'CC' for about 12 years, and there's never been a Golden or another dog she couldn't hold her own against until now. I've a feeling Albert has that same tenacity, so my money is on him too!

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  12. A lawyer advised me once that 'revenge is good for the soul'. Watch out Albert!

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    1. Have you ever taken a good revenge jimbo?

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  13. I have several Scotty/cat stories but my favorite one has to do with a rabbit.
    45 years ago I was working at a hospital lab and one of the techs had a pet rabbit. It had survived Valley Fever testing she thought the rabbit should have a break and took the bunny home. That (huge) rabbit ruled the home with an iron fist, like a guard dog and was the "Top Dog" so to speak.
    When people came to the front door he would make a sound and run towards the screen door and impale himself standing up and open his mouth and hiss.
    I crack-up over that. Once inside he was fine, he ignored you and everything inside. He was house trained. Had his own little box.
    So he kinda slapped us all.

    cheers, parsnip

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  14. Have I ever crossed you? I do hope not John as I don't care for the thought of seeing your eyes narow.

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    1. I doubt you could have crossed Hitler pat

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  15. Your blog is outrageous! I mean, I've never been so entertained by anything in my life! Your videos are perfect for this. I mean, how did you manage to find something that matches your style of writing so well? I'm really happy I started reading this today. You've got a follower in me for sure!

    Cardsharing Server

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  16. Oh, they will work it out. Great read.

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    1. They will work it out. Again and again and again.

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  17. did winnie eat the cats food? we had a cat who would stand in the dogs dish so they couldn't get their food. taking swipes at their noses. and then when bored would wander off

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  18. The mother to our kittens, Snickers, hates our lab/beagle cross Waters and I haven't figured out why. The young newf Grace has snapped at and grabbed at a kitten in passing and snickers doesn't bat an eye. If poor old deaf Waters walks by her she goes all ninja on him! Doesn't seem fair....but maybe she is just annoyed with his general dense ness.

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  19. Glad to hear you were able to save Albert from Winifred. Have a great week, John. :-)

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  20. remind me to never cross you!

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  21. I find a withering look and a sharp AA, works a treat, the animals respond quite well to it too :-)

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  22. The best weapon I have in my small arsenal is the "teacher stare". Talk about withering.

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  23. In the photo, it looks as if they've worked it out, since Winnie has her back to Albert.

    Phoebe is spayed and never had a litter, but she's the most conniving animal who's lived with us. She attacked JoJo when JoJo was a kitten, biting her tail and it got infected. We caught the infection in time, and they learned to tolerate one another. Grace helped with that, as she was the eldest and Jo took a shine to Grace and followed her around. If JoJo got too much, Grace would turn and hiss, and that would be that.

    When Jim came bounding along, Phoebe hissed and would strike at him. I'd give her "the look" but she learned not to look at me before wanting to go after Jim. Late one evening i had left the room and as i returned, i saw her strike him in the face. She got his eye. He came over to me and cried, and i was ready to choke her.

    I called the vet's because i thought of Grace our feral cat, who lost an eye because the cornea had been scratched, most likely by an older cat. It was after hours, so i left a voicemail would he ring, please, and of course, i was in the loo when he called back. I had the cordless phone with me (having just finished things up as it were), and while talking to him, Jim came into the loo. As soon as the vet asked, "And what's Jim doing now?" Jim saw the shadow of his tail on the ground and started chasing the shadow and his tail with all his might. I laughed and cried as i told the vet. My relief was evident, and he told me just to bring Jim along in the morning. No need to pay extra for a midnight call. Jim's eye was fine as it turned out, and i had to apply a salve for a few days.

    Several months later when my FIL died, I still didn't trust Phoebe with Jim, so while no one was home during the few days needed for travel and funeral, he stayed with the woman who'd first told me about Jim.

    I'm guessing Winnie didn't understand Albert's face rub. That's a cat's greeting of saying hello, and as Albert initiated it, that means that he's accepted her. It's not the message that it's okay to be slobbered over or mauled, and it's not aggressive. Maybe Winnie understands that now. I hope so.

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