Officialdom

Do academics make passes as nurses who wear glasses.?.....I will ask chris

It's the curse of the middle aged.....
I have been battling officialdom all day
And my stress levels have been sufficiently raised to a level  that would make the likes of Mother Theresa kick the shit out of one of her fellow nuns.
First my " emergency" designer scotch Egg gift from Tom Stevenson was NOT delivered by the post office ( the postie left one of those " we couldn't deliver your parcel" letters even though I was in the cottage at the time!) .....The lady in the sorting office told me that I could not retrieve the eggs until tomorrow and could not quite understand my chagrin as I shared with her my worry that the said egg may " go off" in the warmth of its packaging!........., then I had a somewhat lively debate with the water board about one of their tankers who has clipped  my field wall yet AGAIN! before spending a wonderful 45 minutes explaining to a painfully polite but ever so vague call centre lady in the Indian sub Continent , that Bt had sent me the wrong broadband hub replacement .
I could spit
At least my new £ 1.99 ebay magnifying spectacles WERE delivered without incident

For the first time in months I can actually read the small print!

46 comments:

  1. They suit you, Sir!

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  2. so we shouldn't have gone to specsavers...ebay it is then

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  3. Blimey, you do look cross, perhaps you need to do video calls with all the folk on the phone, they be so frightened they would do whatever you wanted!

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    1. I am not Rebecca of SUNNYBROOK farm everyday!

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  4. I hope that scotch egg kit has gone missing for ever. I am keeping my eye on you and those eggs.
    As for the specs - they are very distinguished looking - and all for £1.99. Perhaps I should have sent for some rather than visit our local optician, buy titanium frames and have no change from £300. (and I can't always read the small print.)
    Has that slipper turned up? And is it unchewed? Perhaps she just wanted something to cuddle up to.

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    1. I have scoured the cottage but have not found it..... Weird eh?
      Another reason for my ill humour

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  5. I like them!!! They make you look like a professor haha

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  6. Perhaps I should do the same rather than screwing my eyes up all the time.
    You do need to take the sticker off the lens though..

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    1. Lol..... I wondered what that was Jess

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  7. forget the scotch egg and eat the glasses; they'll taste an awful lot better

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  8. Without reading your post first, I was thinking you are either really pissed off or passing a fart. Nice magnifyers......what is that smell?

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  9. Shall tell husband to get his own glasses now - he wears my old ones with pretty frames !

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  10. Anonymous4:23 pm

    You look very distinguished.

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  11. We all have those days don't we ~ having to deal with call centres on the sub-continent I mean.

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  12. You're lucky you've managed without them until now. I hung on squinting until 43 and now I can't read anything without them. I used to think they were sexy until I and to wear them myself and looked in the mirror. You, however are sex personified in them, obviously.

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    1. Did you put them on before you typed that?

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  13. Tom Stephenson's a feeder !!!! XXXX

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  14. You certainly look like a man who means business. I wouldn't like to mess with you John!!!

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  15. I love men in glasses and suits! all Clark Kent like.

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  16. You look just like the chicken in your header photo in those glasses, and the chicken isn't even wearing any.

    The name is 'Stephenson', not 'Stevenson' btw (actually, it isn't either, but show some respect, for fuck's sake.

    So sorry the eggs came when you were out, but I thought you lot in the Welsh villages made other arrangements when it came to things like parcels and wife-swapping.

    I need not have spent SIX POUNDS NINETY FIVE FUCKING PENCE on a Special Delivery, need I?

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    1. I told you when the bloody things were going to arrive - what's the matter with your dogs?

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    2. 1. I look like a chicken.... Well I have been told worse
      2. I should remember the ph after all you are so acid like
      3. I appreciate the huge postage costs..I am touched
      4. They were asleep
      5. My usual postie (pop it in pete) usually taps on the window

      I am touched you have gone out of your way to feed me thomas

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    3. Pop in Pete, the Postman? Sounds like a Carry On porn film.

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  17. Lucky you had the new magnifying spectacles so you could read the small print on the Royal Mail "couldn't deliver" card.

    Could the sorting office lady not have put your scotch egg in the fridge?

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  18. Anything I say will be anti-climactic after Tom's comment :)

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  19. But I would just like to say that once you can read the fine print you own the world.

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  20. You can't imagine how much the thought of Mother Teresa kicking the shit out of a nun makes me smile. You look very handsome in your specs.

    Love,
    Janie

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  21. I had the same experience with Purolator. They left the notice that they could not deliver on the garden Gate 50 feet away from the house!

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  22. Anonymous9:12 pm

    Don't you feel like you are the first person that officialdom has ever had to deal with and they are writing the instruction manual as they deal with your problem.

    Do you call them pound shops? Don't the have reading glasses?

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  23. Our postman (In fact women) loves nothing better than to come to the gate setting all the dogs off barking just to hand me a small package or letter which could be put in the letter box at the bottom of the drive. But when she needs a signature to deliver a parcel never knocks, just puts that annoying card in the box making out I'm not in. And by the time I find it it's too late to collect until the next day. Which is really upsetting when you children are waiting for a present from someone. No xmas tip I think.
    Rosezeeta.

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  24. Ohhh, the glasses do lend you an air of authority!

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  25. You look sexy in the specs!

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  26. I can see by your photo that you'd had quite the day, John.
    We've had the post office do the same thing, but not with a good item.
    Good luck!

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  27. Very fetching in those glasses, girlfriend! Best wishes for a better day today. Can anybody send you Scotch eggs -- or just Tom Stephenson?

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  28. I used to make fun of my father; when he hit around 40, his arms grew too short to read the menu. He didn't live to see me reach that stage... and beyond. After resolving the arm-length issue with magnifiers. Then came the angle issue. Finally could twist and tilt the page enough to read it. Prescription! Then came bi-focals! And then tri-focals! Reading, computer, distance. You have so much to look forward to. But, yes, men will still make passes (well, at least the academic will).

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  29. 'Boy, I got vision and the rest of the World's wearing bi-focals' - Butch Cassidy,
    You look very Germanic in those goggles.

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  30. You wear those specs well, John.

    I had a spate of officialdom myself and am now in the "i've done all i can, let's see if they told me to do is really the right thing." sigh.

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