Thursday, 24 May 2012

* I don’t want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.



I will be turning 50 in one weeks time.
and I have said this all before
Suddenly I feel middle aged 
I felt even older this morning when I was handing my patient over to a new staff nurse on the unit.
Over half my age and with a shit load more chutzpah than I ever possessed at that age, the staff nurse with his over confident air, even tan and perfect teeth, was just that little too bouncy and youthful at 8.00am for my liking.
Even at 23, I was never like him.
I was the shy guy with no dress sense and a bad haircut.
I was the one with bits of my dinner splashed over the front of my jumper!


This morning,as I was giving report, I could see him excitedly planning his work for the day, and with plenty of exuberance, he launched himself into his clinical work like a Labrador puppy mouthing a bone.
With my sagging jowls feeling even more "saggy", and my eyes looking like piss holes in the snow I left him to it and walked to a colleague in her side room on the way out . 
Gently I leaned my weary head on her shoulder and said tiredly "I wish I have perfect teeth and energy to die for!"
My co worker who is  a motherly welsh woman, knocked heads with me,
almost bumping my £5.99 reading glasses off my head


"..at least you can make me laugh" she said.......


" I bet Woody Allen is always being told the same thing" I replied

* The title is one of Woody's more thoughtful quotes

46 comments:

  1. Don't worry, John. It'll wear off, and he'll be like all the rest; just getting on with his work, and swearing under his breath.

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  2. At least we are in it together bro ! with a hop skip and a trip-off to buy you a birthday present xxx

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  3. I get that feeling every morning in the school cloakroom. None of the other mothers of the five yr olds seem to be having hot flushes, pouring sweat and wanting to get the hell outta there . . . probably because they're 25 and I'm 49. Boo Hoo. I don't even make anyone laugh, so think yourself lucky ;-)

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  4. It's taken you a while to start feeling middle aged, then. Just kill the new staff nurse and have done with it.

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  5. Embrace your inner crone, John.

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  6. I would rather cuddle someone with dinner on their jumper than feel like I was standing inside a whirl wind! I go with cosy and dishevelled every time. Lily. xxx

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  7. Don't worry, all that energy and enthusiasm won't last for ever. The NHS will see to that. ;)
    50 is the new 35, John, You are still a spring chicken!

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  8. We are adding a new front desk person in our office and we decided that to work in our office you have to be over 35--We don't want young and cute and bubbly, we've all been there and done that too!!

    But I'm a year ahead of you John, and will be turning 51 in a couple of weeks--50 isn't fatal, but some days it feels like it might be...But they say it's the new 30--I wonder who says that?

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  9. We are who we are, I suppose having our own "hay day" way back when...lol

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  10. I don't get all this fuss over numbers. Let's all just be thankful we are still on the green side of the lawn - the longer and older the better!

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  11. I'll be 52 this year and damned if this middle aged thing isn't a tough pill to swallow. Not in a cosmetic 'gee I'm all wrinkly' kind of way, although that, too, is a royal pain in the arse; mostly in a 'my days are now numbered' kind of way.
    We were camping on the weekend and friends had allowed a 12-year-old friend of their daughter to come along and this kid was obnoxious in a way only 12-year-old snotty girls can be. She was guessing everyone's ages and thought I might be 67. And she grinned wickedly, knowing her comment had found its mark. That girl, the new nurse, young people in general (and I was like this, too) seriously believe they're never going to get old and completely write us off as having anything valid to offer.
    Oh well, your Welsh nurse is absolutely right. You make us laugh and that is a rare talent, my middle-aged friend.

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  12. Getting older beats the alternative.

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  13. But the younger is yet to be tested by the vicissitudes of life... anyone can be young. Not everyone can be a survivor.

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  14. "no dress sense and a bad haircut.
    I was the one with bits of my dinner splashed over the front of my jumper!"


    I've suspected this for a long time, do you think we could be long lost siblings?
    I'd be your OLDER sister of course :-)

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  15. Could be worse. You could be pushing up daisies!

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  16. Well, John, someone told me recently 70 is the new 50. Bull. I remember 50. Be pleased with what you have and enjoy everything. Except maybe nasty cockerells.

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  17. Hahaha!!!!
    Sorry. But you do have a way of making us laugh, John. ;o)

    Young whippersnapper.

    I'll be doing the next decade this year and to me, you are the bubbly energetic one, with all your gardens, ducks, chickens, turkeys and dogs!

    Can't forget Albert the cat now, can we? ;o)

    *hugs* ♥ Have a great weekend, John. :o)

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  18. Well, happy birthday a week early, you messy old comedian.

    I couldn't stand being in the company of a jumpy tanned 20-something for very long before I had to throw that bone of his out the window, hoping it would take him a while to find his way back!

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  19. I'm not the only one who's worn mi' dinner on a regular basis, then. That's strangely comforting. The perky people sort of make me want to slap them with a wet kipper.

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  20. Well, imagine how I sometimes feel at the age of 65 when I'm dealing with some bright-eyed and bushy-tailed 25 year old!

    They're not all like that though. I've seen plenty of jaded, cynical 25 year olds with much less energy and enthusiasm than myself.

    And as others have said, the enthusiasm may very well wear off in a few months and they'll be looking for another job.

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  21. You need a good night's sleep...and let perky do his perky thing...we are all different and we need some perkys to do all the menials.

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  22. Anyone can be perky on a day shift!

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  23. I found that at 50, too, John. Suddenly aware that most likely more days were behind rather than ahead of me and with amazing clarity.

    I have NEVER been a morning person, and although i can fake it pretty well these days, Perky in the Morning people make me curmudgeonly in nanoseconds. Even now i find i want to choke the sh*t out of them. Now, yes, they can be very useful and doubtless think that i'm a b*tch or dull-witted, but they fade before they see me revving up my gears in the afternoon.

    You're still here. There's some sag and wrinkles. Shrug. We've done stuff and been places and not all the roads were paved.

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  24. John, You made me smile this morning.

    When I encounter the perfect and perky, I just think to myself "You'll get yours, it will come faster than you think!"

    I'd kill to be 50 again!

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  25. I turn 50 this year too!!! My brain tells me I'm 25, but my body is screaming that I'm 80!!!! :)
    I wouldn't go back to being 20 again if you paid me....too many good thing would have to be erased along with all that wisdom. I am happier at 50 than I ever could have been at 20, 30 or 40.
    If you are happy with who you are, then you walked the path that was meant for you.
    Chin up John, you are still a handsome, kind hearted, hard worked chap with good friend and people that love you. And THAT is a sign of a life lived well.

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  26. A sense of humor is better any day. How boring life would be without it. Aging, on the other hand, is troublesome. I can't figure out how to embrace it myself. Perkiness has never been something that I do well either. I always feel like the perky ones are trying to hid something behind their perkiness.

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  27. Let's see - beginning of his shift/end of yours . . . day shift vs night shift . . . yeah yeah yeah youth is on his side but experience is on yours. I'll bet ya a buck you could battle your way thru most medical emergencies and he couldn't battle his way out of a paperbag on his own.
    That, and in a pinch we could eat your jumper.

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  28. I just don't understand why the young are so darned youthful!!! "youth is wasted on the young", George Bernard Shaw, this is definitely an excellent assessment of the situation ;)

    perhaps you'll find as I have that the older I get (70 in July) the more I really rather like the young!

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  29. Happy 50 John, makes me feel like such an old duff ;o/

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  30. Happy birthday for next week, in case I forget, due to my age.

    At 50 you're worth two 25 year-olds. Youngsters may have more energy but give me a 50-year old who will use his initiative and experience any day, even if there is dinner down his jumper.

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  31. Oh, I'd take 50-year-old, kind, funny, clever, sarcastic, fascinating you over a 20-something with an even tan and perfect teeth any day.

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  32. I know who I would sooner have at my bedside if I was ill John!

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  33. he won't look the same in 25 years time when his toothline is receding and his hair is all crooked and he has an electricity bill and a mortgage to pay!!

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  34. So you can hear me, eh? Even from a few rows back. (You read ALL of them?!! Considering your following, that's quite a feat my friend.) Happy to know and thanks for the answer. (Three cheers for Badger!!) I'll continue happily commenting wherever in the depths of your blog I happen to find myself then.

    Oh. And also, you'll be brilliant as an old hag, darling. Brrrrrrilliant. (The looming shadow it casts will make all those brownish, little godlings gnash their shiny, little teeth.) :-)

    xxx

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  35. Well you took down the 'Whatever' clip, but she's still doing it on my bloody list!

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  36. he's actually a nice young bloke.... ( young being the word du jour)

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  37. in response to "whatever" i wanted to share a picture :(
    So here it is anyway!

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  38. AF
    i LOVED IT but I wont blog it for fear Tom will swear himself to death!

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  39. I love any evidence of young enthusiasm for nursing. Don't be jaded, be full of hope for future patient care as we hear so much negative stuff esp from the Daily Hate. And as for '50' is that a speed limit? Cx

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  40. I wouldn't want to be THAT age again! Too much to learn, as he will discover. I am always weary of someone that enthusiastic that early in the morning.....could get on my nerves!

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  41. Oh to be 50 again! You are just a pup. xxx

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  42. 24th May you say: In one week's time. Which makes it the 31st. Does it?

    I have deleted everything else I said on the subject.

    U

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  43. Mr young and perky is probably wishing he knew as much/had as much experience as you do.

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  44. ursula june 1st xxx

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  45. I am feeling that way this morning, after a day in the garden yesterday.

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