No, I am not referring to the Sally Field tv star vehicle here but to those relationships that usually last much longer than any other we experience in our lives
I have been thinking about sibling relationships as a result of the little indie film I went to see at Theatre Clwyd last night, which was entitled confusingly Cold Weather
This strange ambling little movie tells the story of Doug (Cris Lankenau) a shambolic but likable young man who gives up his University forensic studies to move in with his sister in Portland. His slightly aimless existence which centres around reading Sherlock Holmes novels, is changed somewhat when his ex girlfriend goes missing and helped by his friend Carlos (Raúl Castillo) and his lonely sister Gail (Trieste Kelly Dunn ) he sets out to work out what happened to her.
 |
| Cris Lankenhau and Trieste Kelly Dunn |
Several scenes had a resonance with me and when I was driving home I came to the rather shocking conclusion that for us that have siblings, we will experience a relationship that may well last for the majority of our life on this planet!
I have been with chris over eleven years now.....my best friend Nuala and I have known each other for over 22 years...and yet my relationship with my brother and sisters has now lasted for 49......
49 years that seems more like 10 in the great scheme of things
How time gallops by.......
Cold Weather captures those quieter moments between siblings that don't need words to explain what is going on. For some that wanted to enjoy a pacy mystery flick, I am sure would have been disappointed... but for me, I loved and recognised the gentle silent interplay between people with a shared past and an ongoing present.
The relationship between siblings is the one that is taken for granted even more that the one that we have with our parents, it is overlooked more often than not because it can be overshadowed by the shit we all have with our own mum and dad.....but you know what it shouldn't be....by nature of time lines....they are going to be the constant in your life long, long after you all are left as orphans!
ps Gummy Meg is doing alright after her facial injuries inflicted by the somewhat unforgiving bulldog.
Tuesday night she spent all night curled up pathetically in the crook of my arm periodically showing her painful gums to me as she moaned all night and today she somewhat theatrically managed to eat several pork loin steaks only after I chewed them first ( the things I do)......
You are a good man pre-chewing Meg's food, John the dogs!
ReplyDeletejacq
ReplyDeleteI am a sad fuc*er!
xx
No you are not! I have a daughter who would do exactly the same!
ReplyDeleteI have a friend, a twin like you, who says you have to take care of your siblings, because at the end of the day who is going to be wiping the drool from you face when you are in your 90's? You brother/sister.
V has told me, she doesn't intend checking out until she is 93 and that I have to take care of her. Being 18 months older, that means I've got to hang in until 95!
That didn't work with my Mom's family. Nine kids and no one spoke to anyone all the time. There was always a major feud going on. I think, with that example in front of me, it's a good thing I'm an only.
ReplyDeleteI know lots of people who would prechew their pet's food if that is what it would take to get them to eat.
Glad to here Meg is having the attention she deserves poor lady.
ReplyDeleteSiblings are lovely to have I'm sure unless you have as an adoptee found them late in life when they can be a nightmare.
Siblings are an odd bunch...sort of a love hate relationship at the best of times....
ReplyDeleteI'd stick with the dogs.
Meg is probably hoping her sister Constance won't be in her life forever.
ReplyDeleteI have 2 brothers and one sister. We have always gotten together and now that we are older we are so very close. I'm now 67 and so glad I had great parents that showed you how to get along with each other and to love each other.
ReplyDeleteI would of never thought of pre-chewing food for a dog.. but I like the idea. You are a wonderful pet owner and I know Meg loves you.
Have a Tiggeriffic Day~! ta ta for now from Iowa:)
Aww you're one of a kind John...you're pets are VERY lucky to have you. I have two half siblings but sadly we all grew up only children...it must be wonderful to grow up in a home with others close to your own age. I'm grateful to have them though and my step family. At this moment I have two kittens playing on my desk in front of my monitor ...I better send this off before I loose it! Have a wonderful day.
ReplyDeleteMaura :)
So sorry to hear about Meg's run-in. Hope she is feeling better. She looks like such a love. I had to rescue my In-Laws Shih Tzu RBI (pronounced Ribbi; Runs Batted In; he came from a baseball family) this past Sunday who was under attack by a cranky female Poodle-Maltese mix. Poor RBI. No wounds, though.
ReplyDeleteAhh...Sibilings, it would be nice if they came with a "non-complete" clause ;)
lol...guess that should have said, "non-compete" v. non-complete...sometimes I do wonder :)
ReplyDeleteHeroic behaviour, but I think I'd use a machine.
ReplyDeleteMy three children get on very well together. I would have hated it if they didn't!
There's one of my three sisters (I won't name which one) - who would have eaten the Dog.
ReplyDeleteYou're a very nice man. I'd do the same for my Dog too.
I'd pre-chew food for my dog...but not my siblings.
ReplyDeleteI have four, siblings that is, but our relationship doesn't bear any resemblance to that of which you speak....
alice
Buy a blender!
ReplyDeleteSeveral pork loin steaks?!
ReplyDeleteDo all your dogs get that, or was it that you didn't want to pre chew tinned dog meat?
lol
ReplyDeleteshe's eating fine now!
Meg being a drama Queen? Let me see, where could she have picked that up from :)
ReplyDeleteGlad to hear Meg is doing better. :)
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, sibling relationships can definitely be interesting. :)
I always wanted an older sister or brother but I'm an only child. My parents look one look at me and thought better of it...
ReplyDeletePoor Meg. Is Constance sulking and mooching about in the dog house?
Isn`t that sibling relationship fascinating and sad all at once??
ReplyDeleteMy thoughts are as follows John:
ReplyDeleteWhat some folk will do for their love of dogs.
Sibling relationship are different from any other, I agree. There ae three of us and we are each eleven years apart, so my sister was 22 years older than me and has been dead for some years. However, that strong tie still existed between us - an altogether different tie from that of even my dearest friends.
I have two older brothers. All three of us were born in 3 different decades. I like having such an age difference in some ways.
ReplyDeleteWe've almost never fought (I think I've fought with my middle brother once, and never fought with the oldest)...I'm also glad they're boys, because I've always gotten along better with guys. Maybe that's why!
I dislike the age difference sometimes though, because we're not very close. In fact, we're not close at all. We talk very infrequently, because our lives are so different, and we all live so far apart.
I love them anyway. That's how it goes, isn't it? :)
john you are the best any family could want and i have known you all your 49 years abd it has been brill love carol
ReplyDeleteI have a good relationship with my 4 brothers, but I don't have one with my sister. I just hope at some point she realizes that these relationships are important because they really are a connection to your past and many of your memories.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad Meg is feeling better--I go today to pick up the Scottie--Nothing heals a heart like a puppy, or turns a household on its ear! :-)
Glad to hear Meg is on the mend.
ReplyDeleteMy brother and i were quite close, and even though it's been over 20 years since he died, i still miss him.
megan
Poor Meg! A pretty hard way to learn the 'family dynamics'.
ReplyDeleteGood post John.....with some my sibs we really don't have to say much. With others, well, it's like getting to know them each time we meet. Strange.