"Kill them! kill them ALL!!!!!!!!!!"

I have mentioned this before on my blog that I am not good in the mornings and yet again this morning, Christopher "Mary Poppins" Burton bounced awake, ready to walk the dogs at 6am,loudly banging on about the cold and the fact that he was letting out the hens "yet again".Oh ....

I dream for the morning where I can doze s-l-o-w-l-y awake with pretty blue birds twittering in whispers outside the window, perhaps with the faint whiff of bacon as a bit of background colour. The most important thing I love is silence. No banter , no chatter, just quiet time. It allows the body to re charge and acclimatize to the day ahead at a pedestrian pace and if I can't get that, my anger knows no bounds!

There are strategies to maintain the status quo, I usually make breakfast (silently) with a cup of full bodied Italian blend coffee on board. I go and potter in the field, I have a bath, anything to "gradually" wake up to the day.

As a junior nurse I often picked patients who were known to be uncommunicative to sort out first, and have in the past performed a full (and intimate) bed bath completely in silence! As I climbed the nursing career ladder, I could start work later, hiding in my office until 9am when the red mist had risen enough to allow for a more normal conversational discourse to take place with staff who knew to keep out of my way until that first coffee had been downed!

When I am at friends' houses or away in Broadstairs for example I can act Dustin Hoffman off the screen with the occasional dawn performance of "Mr Geniality", but underneath I am gagging to kill a bus load of small children.

I wish I could be a nicer person but that just aint gonna happen.......