The Ghost Hens revisited


This afternoon I caught a young woman dropping a container of cooked pasta over the field gate.
I didn't recognise her, as she is new to the village.she's divorced, lonely and perhaps somewhat depressed I thought
The hens love spaghetti she told me rather guiltily....I warned her that Irene the sheep loves pasta too!
I love that people " adopt " the animals on the field from time to time...they all do rather secretively , as if what they are doing is wrong which is rather sweet......i think
The bachelors seems to have endeared themselves to many of the locals, which is a common thing for tiny birds to do. They bring the underdog support  nature of people.
It's a British Thing, I always think
I was reminded of my old broiler birds The Ghost Hens because of it all
Now, for those that don't know, the Ghost Hens were five genetically fucked up broiler hens that arrived at the Ukrainian Village as brainwashed , psychologically damaged little pullets. Designed to eat themselves fat in a matter of weeks, these sad little hens had been brought up in a massive barn of a building under artificial lights with thousands of other little fuck ups .
They had never seen the sun, never ate a blade of grass and had never had the room to scratch their own arse without getting battered by another goggle eyed clone.

Faced with their very own warm hen house and a miniature run, these sad little characters continued to eat themselves fat in silent desperation, but they did eventually react to their brave new world, and calmly and very slowly they started to turn their faces into the sun to live a little.
Surrounded by animal drama and chaos, The Ghost Hens always looked unflappable but their inactivity was just a useful way of coping. They were too big and too comical to run around in silly chicken circles.
They just couldn't do it.

Anyhow,
I remember taking the above photo very well.
It was approaching dusk on a summer's evening and the rest of the field was in constant motion.
The other hens were mooching homewards to roost, the geese were bickering over a patch of grass like they do and the hysterical runner ducks were being , well, just hysterical.
Only the Ghost hens remained still. Sitting gently and serenely  in the evening sun until their white plumage tinged pink..........in the warm evening light

Chatty



I bumped into the vicar yesterday. We talked about retiring. He hangs up his cassock next year and is looking forward to it. I always thought that vicars just carried on until their spinster  house keepers found them dead in the vestry clutching a mysterious note ........perhaps I've watched too many episodes of Midsommer Murders? 
Mrs Trellis tottered through the village and informed me that another village character Tinkering Pete had lost his  shihTzu to a nasty bout of pancreatitis this morning. 
I'll drop in a card later


I forgot to share that If you enjoy bloody, atmospheric whodunnits go and see The Limehouse Golem which is on general release at the moment . It was the movie I saw on Friday and didn't have time to review , suffice to say it's a romp that neatly gets into the psychi of the Victorian poor, with their jet black humour and appetite for gore and it was interesting to see the two police leads ( Bill Nighy and Danial Mayes as Inspector and PC Plod) portrayed as gay men!
I enjoyed it.

I'm presently planning my week. Dinner out and badminton with the Prof, a talk to some retired nhs staff, more work quotes for kitchen work, the garden to clear of dead wood of and a trip to London to see best mate and a trip to see Wings with Juliet Stevenson in the West End !
Oh and I've just bought a smart phone! I'm now down with the yooofff
And that's all before the weekend!

Some of the nursing staff Ive left behind at the bast on Friday! 






Bat 2- The Revenge

12.30 am The Cottage in darkness.
We are in bed
The Prof: " What is that noise?" 
Me ( sleepily) " Huh?"
The Prof: " That noise there! That STRANGE NOISE!"
We listen
There comes a strange intermittent hissing/ squeaking noise from somewhere in the room.
The Prof hunkers up under the duvet " It's that bat!" He hisses
" It's that effin bat!" 
The Prof hates bats, ever since we had one caught in the bedroom of our old house one night, he hates the thoughts of them. I caught the last bat in a pair of my used underpants which The Prof described as a "moment of abject cruelty" 
" The poor little thing didn't deserve that!" As I whipped off my sweaty smalls to cover it
I'm always practical in a mini crisis!

As usual it was me who got up to locate the noise. The Prof pulled the duvet even higher.
"Have you found it?" He hisses as I eventually homed in on the sound
" Yes" I told him " You are quite safe"
The bat was in fact the noise of carbon dioxide gently escaping from a bottle of coke that didnt have it's top screwed on properly! 
Domestic life!

Leaving do

Me pretending to be coy about nice compliments

I noted that during my speech at the joint leaving do ,my former boss laughed long and loudest at my comment that I professionally peaked before I came to Intensive care!
I reminded the room that I was no technical nurse
Four popular nurses have left at the same time, so of course the pub was filled with drunk nurses and doctors all swigging prosecco.
I was sober. I have to pick the Prof up from the airport tomorrow!
It was nice to be sober, and it was nice for nice people to say nice things about me.
Even though many of them were pissed!
What I did like was the " feedback" from a few nurses that ultimately moved me.
Thank you for supporting me
Thank you for giving me positive feedback
Thank you for making me smile and believing in me
Thank you for being kind to me.
Thank you for the back rubs and the stories.
My former manager said nothing to me. It was my peers and the junior nurses that talked the talk
That's all that really mattered, I thought on the way home

Deco

I'm just about to go to the cinema
The lovely old art deco Odeon in Chester has been transformed into
The Storyhouse- an arts centre of some note
The last time I went here was september 1984 

Batty

There is a bat in the bedroom.
I've opened the windows and shut the door on it and have left the little devil to escape but all four dogs are now lined up on the landing sniffing under the bedroom door like drug addicts at a coke party.
I think Albert brought it in but heaven knows how he caught it.
No peace tonight


Disastrous Dates


I am having my kitchen chairs delivered today!
John Lewis has given me a window of 7am to 2pm
Seven hours to kill at home!

The BBC website had a light hearted page on disastrous dates today
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-41173459
It made for a chuckle when I was sitting on the toilet...so much so that Mary tottered in to see what I was laughing at!

We have all had a date that went terribly wrong have we not?
Years ago, I had a date with a guy who suggested that we had a drive into the Derbyshire countryside in order to have a nice pub meal.
Now he drove a new and very powerful car and after just ten minutes I was hit by an overwhelming wave of motion sickness which I tried manfully to subdue as we politely chatted about nice things, like people who don't know each other, tend to do on first dates!

Eventually I could stand it no more and white faced and sweating I demanded that he stopped the car and near fainting I staggered out on the verge in front of speeding traffic and  laid down in the wet grass.
My date got back into his car when I vomited and had to sit there for an age when I slowly recovered still lying on my back as it started to rain!

We did have a few dates after that but nothing came of it , non were in Derbyshire by the way!

Have you ever had a crappy date?
Do tell

Sinking Feeling


James, the Ikea kitchen planner spent over an hour planning my " new" dream kitchen!
Winnie spent the time giving goo goo eyes at him whilst sitting at his feet with her head on his lap
"She's a bit clingy " James noted wryly
" Welcome to my world" I told him as bulldog spittle ran down his pantleg
I nearly cried when he showed me my dream sink!
I'm bloody well easily pleased