A Bad Death

I noted with some sadness that the former Lib Dem leader Charles Kennedy died following what his family described as an "alcohol related hemorrhage." I hope that his cause of death wasn't a ruptured oesophageal varice, but unfortunately I suspect that  it was.
This depresses me greatly as Charles Kennedy always struck me as a sweet natured and principled politician.
I have only seen one death from a ruptured oesophageal varice and I never want the experience again. It was a 45 year old woman who had been brought into hospital with acute liver failure, and unbeknownst to me as a junior student nurse, her cirrhotic liver had caused a back up of blood to the blood vessels feeding from the junction of her stomach and windpipe
As I helped the charge nurse slide the woman from trolley to bed, she gave a little cough. She then said something like " oh no" very quietly and suddenly the entire bed was filled with blood. She coughed again and what I can only describe as a tidal wave of blood erupted from her mouth and I just stood there opened mouthed as the woman literally bled to death in front of me.
It all happened within, what seemed like ,a couple of seconds.
Another experienced nurse raced over with a morphine syringe as the alarm bells went off and the arrest team was called and she dragged  some spare sheets and blankets from a nearby bed and threw them at me
" put them on the floor around the bed" she hissed quickly and then I understood.
The bedclothes were to dam the blood from spreading across the ward floor.
There was nothing we could do.
I was soaked in blood by the time the charge nurse told me to clean up and get a cup of tea and
I remember stripping into pair of  borrowed theatre scrubs in the staff toilets, sobbing in shock.
The poor, poor woman and poor Charles Kennedy, they both deserved better than that

A Break In The Shade

I've been strimming the field today. It's a backbreaking job especially in hot weather. The animals all congregate by the field gate, in the cool shade. From there they can watch  the lane, keeping an eye out for people to scare.

I sat down to eat an orange with my back against the old church wall.....and promptly fell asleep

I only woke up when Islwyn's brother stopped his landrover by the gate to ask me if we wanted an old piano!

Albert at his usual place next to Winnie

The dogs on guard

Meg day dreaming, watched by Bingley

Albert and the Ukrainian Village Hens

The Lane Down The Hill

The lane down to the village....today

At some stage the road which is our existence here in the village will take another turn. Like the lane down the side of The Gop , we will turn around the next corner and instead of venturing down High Street, we will be off to pastures new.
I have known this for a long time now.......such is the life of a successful academic.
I am not playing games when I share this, there is no hidden news waiting in the wings, no new University City where we are off to tomorrow, but in the fairly near future the Prof will need to move onwards and upwards and with a full heart I will be by his side.
I am ok with this.....I have known it ever since we moved to Trelawnyd ten years ago. Then I moved from a Northern City into a village without knowing anyone and I surprised myself that I could forge a new life and a whole new way of looking at things so easily.....I adapted when I thought I never would
..So its a case of I have done it once......I can do it again.
That is very liberating.
Hey ho

Flower Show News...more tits please Rachel

I won't go into details but the Flower Show Committee has agreed on the following new changes to our 43 rd Show

• The Official Opener of the Show has now been chosen given the fact that the vicar has declined the job! After an unanimous vote ( with me abstaining) it has been agreed that Professor Burton will be opening the Show this year. I skyped The Prof with the news informing him that he can sit at his own table with cakes and tea all afternoon......unsurprisingly he has agreed
• We are having sandwiches in addition to cakes for refreshments! ( it took 30 minutes to discuss this!)
• Committee Member Terry has challenged me to a " cook off" in the quiche, boiled fruit cake, bread loaf and novelty vegetable classes!....he is still smarting because I whoooped his arse last year.
• At Auntie Glad's insistence she WILL be having her stall and raffle this year!
• It was UNANIMOUSLY agreed that the BLOGGER PHOTO COMPETITION FOR BEST NOVELTY VEGETABLE be run again this year as it was so popular in the last show.
• 
  
  
  
  
  Rachel's award winning tits from last year's show
  
  
  See link
  
  
  http://disasterfilm.blogspot.co.uk/2014/08/i-will-pass-on-blog-news-mr-butler-our.html

A Committee Of Twelve

The scones have been made and are on the side in Auntie Glad's back larder ready to be buttered for tonight is our First Flower Show Committee Meeting of 2015. This year's show is my ninth and Auntie Gladys' 43rd . It is also my second year totally in charge .
The show committee used to be ruled somewhat by protocol and regulations and in years gone by what the Show Secretary said,  WENT. Today, I would like to say,  I have somewhat of a more relaxed and fun view of role, and the meetings around Auntie Glad's table are noisy, lively and generally good natured affairs.
Our committee consists of 12 Trelawnyd souls.
We have John F who is the laid back Committee Treasurer, who with his white beard and ruddy face looks every inch the sailor that he is. Carol, who lives down our lane, is a favourite muse of our resident " teddy boy "vegetable judge who always insists that she accompanies him on judging day' provides the committee with it's glamour and animal helper Pat, who is a stalwart of the local Women's Institute gives the group some backbone.
Derek and Heulwen from High Street , know everything about the competition and can run the show themselves without any help from me and Ann and Terry, a couple who are always laughing with natural good humour, give the committee it's warmth and fun.
Village matriarch Irene, rolls up her sleeves and works as a long as hard as I have ever done over the Show Weekend and the quiet and diffident Julie from Bron Haul, who has spent many years as a cook, looks as though she will be acting as cookery judge this year for the very first time.
Cameron, our teenage boffin who is in the middle of his GCEs at the moment , is our final associate member. He is responsible for the committee's technical and computer support and designs our publicity posters and is a regular contributor to the show's cookery section.
And so we have twelve.
And Last week , I have put out some more posters around Trelawnyd canvassing for new members
As a group, I feel we need to be welcoming and not inclusive after all new blood keeps the traditional show going
Does it not?

Some of the committee at last year's show

Birthday Girl

There's another birthday in the cottage today as Meg is ten today.
With milky eyes, increasing weight loss, and  occasional incontinence,  Meg seems to be fadingvery fast  in front of our eyes.
She had one of her vague fits last night, the first one in well over 18 months, and is at times very restless and bothered with things.
Yet, in the quiet of the early morning. She climbed up into my lap wanting to see, what I found so fascinating on the ipad

My old birthday girl

Born June 1st 1962

The Prof likes to treat me on my birthday, but I have to be firm that we do things I want to do

rather than things HE wants to do

Shopping is NOT my idea of fun

Anyhow tomorrow we are going to Liverpool tomorrow! 

I have insisted that we go and see the latest Juliet Binoche arty movie ( only showing over the border)

( he's agreed through gritted teeth)

then we will have a bite to eat, 

After that I know we will have a mooch around John Lewis ( ok you HAVE  to compromise don't you?)

Tomorrow night we will go and see my twin sister with a cake!

Fifty fucking three! 

I'll be half a century old plus three

Hey, f&cking Ho!

Bells In The Night

After I qualified as a staff nurse in mental health' I got a job in a prestigious psychiatric hospital in North Yorkshire. The hospital had only seven wards which were all  situated within a beautiful Regency style building in it's own grounds. The wards were carpeted and sympathetically decorated in a period style and  their day rooms filled with comfortable sofas and occasional furniture.
It was a pleasant place in which to work.
I was placed on the mother and baby unit , where seriously ill post partum women and their offspring were admitted for treatment, but most of the other wards catered for acutely mentally ill patients, patients with cognitive impairments and people suffering severe epilepsy..
Staffing generally was very good , but when there was an emergency situation on a ward then an alarm bell would sound and each ward would send a " runner" to help with whatever problem was afoot. No wards were ever locked.
I was telling some of the junior staff this story last night whilst on a break, as a sort of lesson of how Intensive Care is one of the few places in nursing that is probably safest from assault and injury ....things in the early 1980s could be very different!
I remember one night at the hospital when  at around 4am the alarm bell sounded. I was one of five nurses  who responded to the call,
The emergency was on the epilepsy assessment ward , a ward staffed by both general and mental health nurses. On duty were three nurses. A heavily pregnant girl, a young staff nurse just out  of training and an experienced male staff nurse. All three had been sitting in what was essentially a glass box which overlooked the dormitory of patients on two sides.
Out of no where, a powerfully built male patient had suddenly become agitated and  very confused and had hurled himself at the windows of the nurses station. He shattered  the glass with his body, and like an animal he went for the nurses inside. The male nurse hit the emergency buzzer then bolted out of the office to get help, but as he ran, the office door bounced shut , locking the two women inside. The pregnant nurse, with great presence of mind clambered over a desk and jumped through a window into the grounds to safety but unfortunately the patient caught hold of the young female staff nurse before she could flee.
By the time we arrived on the scene a couple of minutes later, the patient had fractured her jaw and had broken her arm as well as biting her badly on the side of the face.
This was the only time , I have been truly frightened at work Over the years I have been personally abused many times by patients and relatives alike. I have been screamed at, shouted at, spat at and in one case threatened with a broken teapot! but this situation with a brain damaged patient and a young helpless staffnuse still lingers long in the mind.
A scary story to share with a group of nurses in the wee small hours of the morning eh?