Going Gently

A Dark Day

There is only one thing worse than seeing a bad film and that is sitting through a bad film with the director sat there in an audience of fifteen hardy souls.
Tonight I went to see the Welsh horror/ adventure film The Darkest Day Which is a cheerful little period piece which the programme described thus
"Set in the aftermath of the famous Viking raid on Lindisfarne in 793 AD, The Darkest Day sheds some light on the brutal reality of Saxon Britain as a Viking raid chase down a monk protecting a Holy Book"
Hummmmm
I managed 34 minutes of it before I followed another decerning cinema goer and limboed under the projector and slipped out of the cinema .. We were followed by the usher who was sat next to the door.
He looked upset and stopped both of us by stage whispering
" you both aren't going are you? There is a question and answer session after the film...it sounds very interesting!"
I smiled weakly and said ( I can't quite believe this)
" I couldn't stay late because my dogs needs a walk"
The woman behind me was more direct
" I'm off home......The film's crap" she said shortly

Perhaps if here had been a bit of singing..it would have been better

Giving As Good As You Get

Bosoms' new fruit trees!

I took the dogs out for a walk yesterday and when I returned there was a gift waiting for me by the back door.
Two fruit trees and a fruit bush had been left all neatly packaged up alongside a bottle of mite powder and a container of some apple cider vinegar ...a present from two friends from Prestatyn .
Today a large pile of spare egg boxes had been delivered alongside several loaves of stale bread for the animals from someone unknown and back on Sunday afternoon another bag of warm home made scones had been dropped off by a windswept Auntie Glad.
In my mind acts of kindness always need to be repaid.
Being on a limited budget, necessitates some lateral thinking when it comes to gift giving.....having a boost of thirty or so refugee hens has increased my egg production drastically, and so a thank you of a dozen eggs can oil the cogs of good relationships in and outside the village.

Yesterday I went all Mary Berry and made a pumpkin pie, the remainder of which I will share out between the fruit tree givers and Auntie Glad. I have boxed up some eggs too.and will drop everything off today......mind you the lurid looking pie may not be that gratefully received ...it does look like shit on a plate.....

Bitch Slap

As you all know....I adore a good bitch slap

The one at the end of this scene is a cracker

Enjoy

Bulldog Training

It's not been all plain sailing.....

But Winifred has now settled into our cottage and into our lives.

She remains a hefty, spatially unaware, clumsy dog

Who is surprisingly over active for a breed which has often been labelled lazy and lethargic

some of this may be connected to the fact that her attachment to me is incredibly strong, so

Where I go, she goes , but I am sure that most of her " constant need to be on the go" is a result of an over inquisitive nature

She is a watcher.. And constantly needs to be " in the loop"

She has come to adore her daily walks with the other dogs and will line up impatiently when the leads are picked up, stamping her fat feet on the mat in excited anticipation

She has now accepted Albert as one of the pack after he had whooped her arse after being cornered in the bathroom

She understands that Meg has top dog position on my knee at all times

And she likes to nip your toes when she is feeling particularly playful.

But, for the most part she will sit right in front of me. Still and alert

With her heavy brown eyes watching mine

I would pay a kings ransom to find out what

She thinks about

In that big sad bulldog head of hers

Treat

I had to go to weightwatchers tonight

Then had an interview with my Samaritan director in Rhyl
It's all bloody go

I have now lost a total of 20 lbs since I started my diet 7 weeks ago

So stopped off on the way home

And had 2 scotch eggs from sainsbury's

...........

in quick succession
Eaten in the car park
.......
Fucking lovely

Hey Jude

The Great Storm Jude passed us by with barely a gust.
The villagers didn't have to huddle within the safety of St michaels's thick stone walls as Auntie glad rang out a warning to the parish on the church bell.
And no one held hands behind the pews singling " Abide with me" like they did at the end of the 1950s version of The War Of The Worlds
Everyone just stayed at home and watched Downton Abbey

I think we are all in need of some some sort of disaster...... Not a real one, I have you know......I wouldn't be that flippant seing that people have actually been lost down south when Jude hit land, no..what I do mean is that a national " threat" is long overdue , one that galvanises the population into action and a sociability that stops this " little bubble" existence that most people now inhabit.
Something not too life threatening
Just a calamity that would bring out the Best of British Women's institute mentality out in all of us.