Mr Dixon Is Back

It's back tonight!

The final part of who will survive in post apocalypse Atlanta

Will asperger Daryl ever hold hands with abused mom Carol

Then tell her " I'm gay'"

will Hershel ever get proper rehab for his amputated foot?

Will anyone realise that Beth is 27 and not 17?

And will anyone else even bother to utter those famous words

"Where's Carl?"

And before any of you say it

I KNOW I'M 51!

But deep down , I am a burger munching, sad teenager

Who lives a fantasy existence in his rubbish strewn bedroom!

Gotta go!

Mom's calling me for dinner

Next Time I'll Lock The Door

Being a cat amongst a household of rambuncious terriers cannot be an easy job

But after nearly six years Albert has managed to maintain an existence which is practically stress free, injury free and thankfully totaly devoid of the rather stomach churning dog habits of adminstering agood bottom lick.

This morning , as I was sat on the loo reading the BBC news on my Ipad, I could hear the dogs galloping around the cottage. Dogs cannot have intelligent horseplay, it is just part of their genetic make up. Once a chase has started , they seem to put on their idiot heads, they throw any good sense out of the window and they turn effively into hairy , uncoordinated morons.

Cats on the other hand can enjoy a good romp, but know instinctively when to draw the line, their control is a product of quiet self serving intelligence.

The chase went up and down the stairs all the time I was reading all about that amazing meteor shower in the Urals and by the time I was catching up with the Oscar Pistorius affair Albert shot into the bathroom and jumped silently into the bath, where he sat quietly and still as a statue.

The dogs then all burst in victorious in the presumption that they had cornered the cat in the smallest of rooms. They were all goo goo eyed like excited babies, but suddenly all calmed down when Albert was no where to be seen. Not one of the three, thought to look inside the bath, where Albert was sitting, silently licking his paws.

Deflated, the dogs thundered off to recheck the other rooms of the cottage, and after a reasonable and relaxing moment of peace Albert climbed out of the bath and walked over to offer me a face rub.

His expression said it all

"Suckers!"

He was thinking

Things I Have Never Done

Last night I read with some interest Angola Tom's Wild West adventures on A HIPPO ON THE LAWN. His latest blog entry outlines what only can be described as a brawl between himself  and a shop customer and reading the blow by blow details I realised that at the age of 51 I have never actually had a proper fight with ANYONE.
Now sure I have had my fair share of lively disagreements in my time:-
(Many years ago I actually had an animated few words with the RFWF which on reflection could have resulted to my hasty admission to the local A&E)
But , the limits to my testosterone has kept my aggression to  the shouting kind as well as the odd flounce.

This whole subject has gotten me to thinking.
What other things have I never done or experienced after living on this planet for over half a century?
( and I am thinking experiences that I wish I had done)

1. I have never walked up Snowdon ( which is at 3,500 feet is the highest mountain in Wales)
   As a native Welshman this is a terrible omission on my part.

2. I have never walked out of the sea in blue budgie smugglers like Danial Craig from CASINO
    ROYALE

3. I have never made a quiche Lorraine without it having a soggy bottom

4. I have never climbed a ladder any higher than the sixth rung

5. I have never owned a car with a clean interior

6. I have never finished off an attacking zombie hoard with technically impressive brain shots

7. I have never caught a fish on a line

8. I have never owned a proper suit

9. I have never eaten a meal without dribbling something where it shouldn't go.

10. I have never miked a cow or been on a jury

What I have done!

I have seen 4 babies born

I have sipped cocktails in a swanky New York piano bar overlooking the Manhattan Skyline

I have hand reared three goslings to goosehood

I have had my fat arse filmed during a TV documentary

I have chased a psychiatric patient around York Minster

I have walked a bride to be down the aisle

I have been mugged

I have caused 3 minor car accidents

I had had 4 serious girlfriends ! ( a long time ago!)

I have had three serious boyfriends

I nearly chocked  to death on a mint imperial

Flower Show Schedule

The weather deteriorated this afternoon

so I have been busy updating the Flower Show Blog Site

here it is

http://trelawnydflowershow.blogspot.co.uk/

 

I hope we get a few non Trelawnyd entries again this year?

Listen to the nice song and have a look at what you could enter!!!

Victims of the Recession

The new girls in their tempory run

Yesterday a rather sullen poultry owner called John called at the cottage
His five tame hens ( 2 warrens and 3 delicate silkies) needed a new home. The credit crunch and the recession that we hear about every single day has visited his home with a vengeance and through no fault of his own, he has had to up sticks and move to where the work is.
North Wales is a pretty place to live.
But like many rural areas, jobs are not two-a-penny.
I Felt very sorry for the chap.
His birds were beautifully cared for and healthy and before he left, I made sure that his warrens had rings on their legs, so that if he or his wife visited again ( he said they would like to) he would be able to recognise his own hens amid the main flock.
I have read that due to this bloody awful recession we now find ourselves in, animal abandonment and cruelty is at an all time high.
At least these five have found their way to the Trelawnyd safe haven thanks to their caring owner

The weather has closed in again....this rain is seriously pissing me off

Llanasa WI

When you're ready

They were a lovely audience

Only one lady fell asleep

Thank you
You was class

Birdy Coonan Was Right

'What a story......'

My favourite film of all time is ALL ABOUT EVE. In my dreams I live a life where wisecracking one liners, waspish divas and suave villains are the order of the day.

It's a common day dream of middle aged old queens.

As a favour to animal helper Pat ( who is high up on the Women's Institute hierarchy table) I am giving a talk to the Llanasa WI branch this evening.

The subject will be " blogging" in general and " Going Gently" more specifically 

and as usual I have left my preparation rather late in the day.

As I was bucketing water into the ducks' paddling pool this morning I stopped briefly to go through a rough version of my introdction, and the animals, who at that time are not used to me even farting once let alone spouting a whole pile of 'prose' in their direction, all stopped what they were doing to listen carefully to what I was up to.

I had just covered my " blogging as therapy " line when I caught sight of the Ewes  giving me a quizzical stare and all I could think of was Thelma Ritter's famous one liner in All About Eve, which perhaps sums me up more than any other

WHAT A STORY!.....EVERYTHING BUT THE BLOODHOUNDS SNAPPING AT HER REAR END

For Cro

Cro asked me to post a video of other parts of the village, so that he could get a mental picture of the place a little more. I made the mistake of trying to take a few clips this afternoon as I waited for the dog groomer to do her thing.
Forgive the poor quality film making, I was trying to hold an armful of flower show schedules, two dogs as well as trying to fend off 'French' comments ( why French?)  from affable despot Jason who caught me filming down Chapel street!

Yes, not known for my sparkling delivery