Cock Joke

I worked last night, and it was busy shift.
Intensive care can be a bit of a bunfight when you are looking after a critically ill patient....you can feel rather like a juggler with too many balls in the air...and by the time I finished my shift I was jiggered! Thank goodness for my colleague Richard, a diminutive Filipino staff nurse who possesses more energy than Auntie Glad,, without his help, I would have never have finished all of my jobs before morning staff staggered onto shift


So I took the dogs to bed when I got home and slept soundly for an hour with Meg's paws around my neck.....how do full time nurses cope with the stresses of intensive care? I 'll be buggered if I know.


I will leave you with a joke sent to me by my friend Geoff.....enjoy!



"A farmer buys a young cockerel
As soon as he gets it home, it rushes around like a lunatic and shags all 150 of the farmer's hens.
The farmer is impressed
At lunchtime the cockerel again shags all of the hens again without a break and the farmer starts to get somewhat tense.....
the next day the farmer finishes the milking and finds that the cockerel has shagged all of the ducks, turkeys and geese.....and by the end of the day the farmer comes across the cockerel pale , gasping and half dead on his back, with a flock of vultures circling slowly in the sky above him

The farmer bends down and says quietly "you horny little bastard..you deserved that!"
After which the cockerel opens just one eye slowly saying in a whisper
"Ssssshhhhhhhh...they are all about to land......."

Meek's Cutoff

(Glory White) Shirley Henderson ,(Millie Gately) Zoe Kazan and Emily Tetherow (Michelle Williams)
wait for their husbands to decide the course of action

I have been wanting to see the Kelly Reichardt Western Meek's Cutoff for an absolute age, and just managed to squeeze in an afternoon's showing of it at Theatre Clwyd yesterday.
I was so glad that I did,, for it is a slow burn of a movie which draws the audience in at the oh-so-slow pace of a wagon being drawn across the Oregon desert in 1845.
For the majority of the movie the story of the ponderous yet tense trek of three families who have put their trust in a mountain man who has stated he knows a quick way to the promised land of the West, is centred around the visually claustrophobic views of the esentially lost characters.
As the inside view of the covered wagon canopys  obscure the prairie view, the camera shots mirror the blinkered views from under the women's bonnetts and as the characters struggle with the terrible hardships of fatigue,low morale,hunger and doubt, for the most part in near silence, the audience is witness to a dreadfully tense and austere tale which is so different to the more garralous and traditional Westerns we have all become accostomed to.
Despite the sparse verbal interaction between the characters, the performances in Meek's Cutoff are exemplary

Michelle Williams is especially good as the strong willed and self contained
 Mrs Tetheroe,who alone challenges their guide's assertion that he knows the 
right way to go.

Through some subtle physical acting rather than any speeches, she perfectly portrays
the grim determination and acceptance of her role as a women that her character
is forced to possess.
Will Patton underplays her husband, the measured Solomon Tetheroe ,with skill and 
Scottish actress Shirley Henderson is a real stand out as the devout and nervous 
Glory White.

Like I said, for some the slow, almost unbearable pace of the is movie will put some 
off it,but for me, the long interchanging tableau's of  lost, tired settlers crossing
the faceless prairie was a stunning cinematic experience.
9/10

Old Lady Down............but not out

The next village down the valley is a old mining Village called Dyserth. Between it and next large village called Rhuddlan   there is a long fast straight road , bounded by the neat fields of the Bodrhyddan Estate.
I often drive down this road, on the way to the Hospital, to the supermarket and to the animal feed shop, and early this morning I hurried down the road to pick some corn up before I needed to go to the doctors for a routine blood test.

Often I see a rather sprightly elderly lady walking with some purpose on the path next to this road, She always seems to wear a tweed skirt and a hat and as she strides forward with some gusto, she always holds a long stick in front of her and continually slaps it onto the ground with the same tip tap rhythm. At the end of the stick is what looks like a large white tennis ball, and I presume that this lady is seriously visually impaired if not blind.

This morning I saw her on her constitutional, marching forward with her head held high......and as I returned home I spied her again standing at a field gate.
She was holding the top bar of the gate with her face raised to the sun with eyes closed and there was the biggest smile on her face as  she was obviously enjoying the warmth of the morning sun.

It was a brief snapshot of a simple pleasurable moment, but it touched me so much I suddenly felt like crying

Anyhow enough of the soppiness
Its become a bit of an "old lady day" today...word went around the village last night that Auntie Gladys had had a fall at home and had fractured her pelvis but was still at home.
I called around this morning to find a pale, slightly frail Gladys sat at her kitchen table surrounded by worried neighbours and friends.She had indeed injured her pelvis in the fall but felt well enough to be at home with help from family and loved ones.
I could have kissed her as all she seemed worried about was the fact she couldn't sell her usual number of Flower Show Raffle tickets!
Now that's the spirit the won us the war!
When I left, she called out after me
"I can still make some scones for your open day!" and then added with a chuckle
" I'll just do them sitting down"

(Gladys on video from earlier in the year)

Police Beat

One of my favourite web sites  that I delve into on an evening is the dry-as-a-piece of toast police blog entitled Police Beat at The Unalaska Advertiser.
This is a chronicle of the the police work in a small Alaskan city.... and unintentionally some of the reports are hysterically wry in the way they are reported
have a look if you have a minute (below is a typical example)

"Assault – A drunk at the Harbor View Bar grabbed the buttocks of a man he mistook for someone else and when the butt-grabber offered to make amends by buying the grabbee a drink, the grabbee insisted he instead be paid $20 for the offense. A third person, attempting to intervene in the ensuing argument, was struck by the grabbee in the face and received a broken nose for his trouble. The third person pushed the grabbee to the ground, whereupon he began banging his head on a parking lot stop block in order to obtain some injuries to show police. No charges were filed.




My favourite tv reality cop Charlie Etheridge

A New Village Shop

Lee, the affable manager of the Village Pub is opening a shop tomorrow.
Until 2010, Trelawnyd has always had a shop. Indeed at one time there was a baker's shop, three general stores, a small electrical shop and a small sweet shop all within the village boundary!, but since the Post Office shut last year the population has to walk a mile up the road to the Spar Garage, which at least provides a basic (if slightly expensive) range of goods.
The new shop will offer home made pies, home made bread, milk, vegetables ,fruit, and the like and will be run from a small refurbished area at the back of the pub....the enterprise shows initiative and thought for the community and should be in my mind, be supported by the villagers who need to be reminded of the phrase "use it or lose it" 
I am sure that the older people here will eventually use another village store...it is the younger, working population that may need a push not to get into their cars and razz down to Sainsburys  in Rhuddlan which is around 5 miles away.
So people of Trelawnyd.....get down to the Crown tomorrow with your shopping bags at the ready!

It's a lovely warm day again today, weeding and strimming needs to be done and it is time for CJ and Badger to have some natural sun in the garden. CJ is not feathering up at the moment and still is retaining  his fluffy down which is not waterproof, so still has to be protected from summer showers, but the odd couple still look rather sweet together and do resemble, as Tom Stephenson described..as looking like Pooh and Piglet.

Tits and Ass (and) "That's one Ugly F*cker!"

I worked last night
Today I pushed through the weariness and with ALL of the dogs in tow, went knocking on doors like some demon Avon Lady in order to capture more cake makers for the open day.
I had another plan. knock on the door, line the dogs all into a row and collectively hit the person opening the door with a whole array of big , hopeful smiles, and a bit of the "tarrrrrahhhhhh! " factor
Yes all tits and ass!.........we were playing the showgirls card!
And it kind of worked!
I have now managed to win over 42 people to bake for me in addition to the 13 people who have promised raffle prizes ...... peoples' kindness is very touching.

Yesterday a woman with a car boot full of bantams  stopped by with a sob story and a winning smile....She needed to find them a new safe home...
sod ya!
You all know how the story ends........
take a look at Phylis Diller there in the middle

                                           

 

A local stopped by this afternoon and took one look at the hen and said

"That's one Ugly "fu*ker!"

He ain't wrong!!!!

George...The Joy of Scottish Terriers 1

Kim over at http://lifeatgoldenpines.blogspot.com/ has a new puppy a wheaten scottie! According to literature, the Scottish Terrier personality can be described thus:-
"Friendly and playful as a puppy, the Scottish Terrier matures into a bold, jaunty, yet steady and dignified adult, with greater independence than most terriers. He is staunchly self-reliant and fearless -- also dour and crusty at times"
Well take out the dignified, the dour and the crusty, and the above description is dead ringer for our George,a dog who often is relegated to the more shadowy areas of this blog by his more robust of animal housemates.

George is that slightly awkward kid from school who always wore his uniform a little too severe and who was always walking home by himself with an over large leather brief case swinging from his arm. He wasn't lonely or unhappy, but was generally self reliant, geeky and on the quiet a bit of a comic when you got to know him......he was also bullied terribly but bright enough to avoid most of the brickbats that was hurled at him.
Our George is a constant. He is never moody,he is always insanely loyal and remarkably unneedy . He knows his place in the pecking order ( even the new Gosling in the shed is of a higher status than he is) and seems content to live  his lot with a cheerfulness which is at times almost heartbreaking in its sweetness.

Kim, if your new puppy is anything like George, then you are going to experience a decade of comical canine company,

ps Village cake contributions so far for the Allotment open now number 31 bakers!

The Big Society and Raspberries

David Cameron's concept of the "Big Society" is said to be the one aspect of his manifesto that is the hardest for Joe public to get to grips with.
For many it is just a cheap way to get things done in a society that is strapped for cash .For others it is a  welcomed step away from the nanny state ideas, when communities can get on with things literally for themselves, but like most political ideas.......the idea is not  really a new one.

Looking at a snapshot of the village and it's infrastructure, it is easy to see where individual and "non official " self directed work has benefited the community......it's been happening for years and years....and all without the sanction and patronising umbrella of government!

 The Village Conservation Group is responsible for the little knots of floral colour all over Trelawnyd.
Pretty flower beds have all been planted out infront of the pensioners' sheltered bungalows, and the Next to the Church a herbaceous border is now in full bloom.
All of this has been organised by volunteers in their own time

 Last year the Flower Show Committee which was an off shot from the village welfare committee, provided the village school garden with equipment they needed and this year we have had an idea to purchase some extra trees to be planted in the old Churchyard.

The present day Graveyard has been totally renovated by the hard work of a single villager, Islwyn Evans, who organised new paths to be laid, new fences to be erected and old stonework and walls to be repaired and upgraded.
His was a labour of love which lasted a few years, and the result for all of his unpaid work has been phenomenal!
Mr Cameron take note......just leave people to it eh?

Anyway, our day has been a sort of restful one. Chris helped me dig over the lower veg patch.
and he did also helped me pick some raspberries before he darted back to the cottage for a snooze in front of Miss Marple.

Despite being a lofty academic his is not adverse to aspot of "Carry On " humour